Please share it in the comments.
If you don’t have a go-to response, that’s okay! It’s not necessary. But if you’re like me and often find yourself stunned to silence by harassers, a go-to phrase can be really useful.
So if you’re looking for a response you can practice and give without thinking twice, you may find a conversation that occurred yesterday on the Stop Street Harassment Facebook page helpful.
Stop Street Harassment: Do you have a go-to phrase when dealing with harassers?
Mine is, “Don’t harass women.” I like it because I can say it quickly and it applies to any situation. Plus the phrase allows me to identify the behavior and tell them not to do it and I feel like I’m standing up not only for myself but for all women who are harassed!
1. mine has become, “you can’t talk to women like that. you have no right to harass anyone. it’s gross.”
2. It depends on the context, obviously, but I’m a big fan of just yelling ‘NOT A COMPLIMENT’ or ‘NOT FLATTERED’. Also short and gets the point across.
3. Do you always walk with it in your hand – used this one a couple of times in Hindi
4. Mine’s a little more….direct. Two words- the second word’s ‘off’.
5. i’ve said, “don’t talk to me like that,” “i didn’t walk by for your pleasure.” i want to start saying, “would you talk to your mama that way?” but i think talking about someone’s mama could get a little tricky in certain situations. oh, and my favorite finger.
6. no i don’t.my response depends on the situation and how i am feeling.
7. Mine is “go ___ yourself”. I change it to “leave me the f’ alone” if the situation is more precarious. With either, you must have a total ‘don’t f with me’ attitude to pull it off. I do.
8. I said this to a man once: He told me to smile and I said “stop harassing women.” He said – “I’m gay!” I should have asked him if being gay means it is impossible for him to treat women in a condescending way.
9. I sometimes say “Don’t talk to me (or look at me) like that – I don’t like it.”
10. “Effing perv” seems to be my standby, in the loudest voice I can lay my vocal chords to.
Sarah says
My first response is always stop and turn to face them. I am a petite girl who always looks quiet, but the moment I open my mouth, I can out scream anyone.
I usually go on about how dare they objectify me, how I am not a piece of meat to be stared at, why would they deem it an appropriate thing, that I am a stranger that they do not know, how would they like it if someone said that to your sister, and so on. I find the louder I am, the more I go on, the more shocked they become and the bigger the crowd staring.
At 17, I have been harassed, assaulted, felt up, followed and chases, screamed and yelled at, threatened, and nearly raped.
I refuse to fear them.
kyleth says
I had a guy pull out his penis in the parking lot of a bar after a full night of his trying to get me to go have sex with him in his truck. I told him, “I’ve seen better,” and I went back inside.