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Archives for July 2010

Rockwell’s painting “The Flirts” should be titled “The Harassers”

July 9, 2010 By HKearl

From NPR

Anyone who believes street harassment is a recent occurrence can check out this Norman Rockwell painting “The Flirts” from 1941.

The photo caption, in part, reads:

“Owner Steven Spielberg comments that the men’s glances are ‘totally innocent, completely moral,’ and ‘at the same time, just naughty enough’ that you know they aren’t ‘total squares.'”

Wow. Spielberg and I have different definitions of “innocent” and “moral.” I guess reading hundreds of women’s stories about how much they hate street harassment and studies that show how much it impedes their mobility and comfort in public has left me with zero tolerance for ANY street harassment. Where he sees innocence, I see men purposefully, or at least uncaring-ly, making a woman feel uncomfortable. Where he sees morality, I see male bonding at the expense of a woman.

He also rates them on their performance of masculinity. They’re red-blooded men, a little bit naughty, not squares, so of course they’re going to leer at a woman! Am I right? It’s all in good fun… for the men, that is. Not for women who simply want to go about their day and are barraged by harassing men leering, catcalling, whistling, honking, stalking, and groping them. We are human beings, not objects to ogle and rate!

This painting is part of a new exhibit called, “Telling Stories: Norman Rockwell from the Collections of George Lucas and Steven Spielberg” launching this month at the Smithsonian American Art Museum in Washington, D.C.

To celebrate the exhibit launch, NPR talked with George Lucas and Steven Spielberg and their collections. I’m horrified by quotes from the radio show regarding the above painting, which I think clearly depicts gender-based street harassment.

“Another Rockwell painting is also movielike. In the 1941 Saturday Evening Post magazine cover The Flirts, a pretty blond in a convertible waits at a stoplight. Next to her, hanging out of the window of an immense turquoise truck, a beefy driver picks the petals off a daisy as if to say, “she loves me, she loves me not.”

“He looks at her with a nice smile on his face,” says “Telling Stories” curator Virginia Mecklenburg. “He’s not leery. He’s just being a guy.”

But the pretty blond stares snootily straight ahead and won’t give the driver the time of day. It’s funny in a gentle way — a Rockwell way.

The scene is reminiscent of something out of Lucas’ 1973 film American Graffiti — although the painting is part of Spielberg’s Rockwell collection.

“That certainly could be Richard Dreyfuss looking at Suzanne Somers down there — although she didn’t have a convertible,” he says.

Wow. I have several immediate responses to this discussion.

1. Insulting to men: It is insulting to men to say that the harassers are “just being guys.” Respectful men do not lean out of vehicle windows to leer (I disagree with Ms. Mecklenburg and say that is definite leering) at women in the car next to them. There’s nothing wrong with looking for a second or two at someone nearby, but there is something presumptuous and disrespectful about invading a person’s space by having a laugh with your buddy and pulling off daisy petals in a “she loves me, she loves me not” way while staring at her when she clearly doesn’t want to be bothered.

2. The snooty argument: Calling her “snooty” because she doesn’t want to engage with her harasser is old. How many women have been called “bitch,” “ugly,” “stuck up,” “racist,” and so forth just because they refused to engage in dialogue with a harasser or act thankful over his “compliment?” We are not snooty, we just want to be treated respectfully. I guess in a patriarchal society those mean the same thing.

3. Responses to harassers: If she did respond in a “positive” way to the harassers, would they have increased their attention? Would she be considered a woman with “loose morals” for flirting with strangers in public? I guess she’d still be “snooty” if she had demanded they treat her with respect. Women are damned if they do, damned if they don’t when it comes to dealing with street harassers.

4. What she’s really thinking: How many times have we as women been in the same position as the woman in the painting? Sitting or standing there thinking to ourselves, “Please let the light change…act like you don’t hear them… I wonder if they will follow me? Where is the closest police station I can drive/run to if they do?” We don’t know what men who harass intend to do and so being harassed can be scary, no matter how “innocent” it seems. Especially for rape survivors.

5. Class: This painting emphasizes the stereotype that street harassment is only instigated by lower/working class men toward beautiful, well-dressed women. There are men of all races and classes who harass women, so stereotyping is inaccurate and impedes finding a solution to ending street harassment if it’s dismissed as a class issue. There are women of all appearances, backgrounds, and classes that men harass. In fact, women without cars tend to get harassed the most because they must rely on foot, bike, or public transportation to get around and encounter many more men than someone in a car might and they can be seen as more vulnerable than someone in a car.

6. Humor: I see none. It’s not funny to me that “lower class” men are daring to harass a wealthier woman. I see, hear about, and even experience it (i have class privilege) often. No matter the class, women are still “less” than men, so men of any class can feel free to harass women of any class. And they do – men of all classes harass women of all classes. Where’s the humor? Also, the scene in the painting is not funny for the woman and for me as a woman, it’s not funny to look at her discomfort.

7. American Graffiti reference: Suzanne Somers did not appear to dislike the attention of Richard Dreyfuss. This woman does. It’s been a while since I’ve seen American Graffiti but I don’t remember Dreyfuss’s character acting disrespectful (correct me if I’m wrong). The context for their encounter was different. All of the teenagers in town drove around and tried to find their friends and find someone to hook up with. In contrast, in this scene it’s daytime and the men are on the job and she is heading somewhere and does not want to be bothered. Why is it so hard for people to understand the difference between mutual flirting and men straight up disrespectfully harassing women who want to be left alone?!

I shouldn’t be surprised about the dialogue around this painting of gender-based street harassment when it seems like most people dismiss such harassment as harmless, but I’m still sitting here seething!!

What are your thoughts?

(Also, a big thanks to my wonderful partner who heard this story and immediately recognized it as street harassment and called me up to tell me to check it out.)

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Filed Under: News stories Tagged With: George Lucas, Normal Rockwell, NPR, Smithsonian American Art Museum, Spielberg, Telling Stories: Norman Rockwell from the Collections of George Lucas and Steven Spielberg, The Flirt

Harassment often keeps woman in Spain from leaving her house

July 9, 2010 By Contributor

Before starting to tell my stories, I’d like to say something. I’m Spanish. I say this in case I make any mistakes when writing. I usually read feminist websites or blogs often and I found out about this site. Thank you very much for your amazing work and to the people that share their stories, I’d like to tell them that I’m extremely sorry for them and let them know that they are not alone and I hope everything gets better in the future.

I don’t feel comfortable saying this, but I’ve been touched by strangers. I have experienced all kind of harassment (from light to heavy). I once was harassed even when I was 11/12 years old. I once was stalked by an old stranger in the street. Someone took a picture of me topless in a beach. (My brother laught at several of this things. I’ve realised how he is or was and I keep little contact with him. It’s painful.)

I don’t know if this is considered street harassment or plain humiliation. Many years ago I traveled to Liverpool alone. I felt so alone. I was having a hard time. A bunch of strangers came to me in the street (I was waiting for the traffic lights to go green) and threw me a bag of garbage while laughing hysterically. I went to the nearest phone box and I really had a hard time stopping crying and going back to the residence where I lived while talking to my family because it seemed like I could never stop.

Lately I’m really depressed. I almost never leave the house, but sometimes I want to go out, take a walk, clear my mind. Almost 80% of the time I’m street harassed. I insult them or show them the finger but I still feel powerless.

I wish people would talk more about this topic and raise awareness in my country too.

The following is a message for sexists, homophobes, and people who do this in general.

YOU’RE SWINE!!! I WISH YOU’D DIE!!!

EVERY REPLY TO THIS MESSAGE WILL BE SISTEMATICALLY DELETED AND IGNORED.

P.S.: It’s possible that I’m forgetting other stories. Unfortunately there have been a lot.

– Anonymous

Location: Mostly in Spain

Share your street harassment story today and help raise awareness about the problem. Include your location and it will be added to the Street Harassment Map.

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Filed Under: Stories, street harassment Tagged With: sexual harassment, spain, street harassment, verbal harassment

In Delhi, 2 out of 3 women experience harassment

July 9, 2010 By HKearl

Safe Delhi PSA

Two out of three women in Delhi suffered sexual harassment at least 2-5 times during the last year. Via the BBC:

“Women in the national capital feel unsafe in many public spaces, and at all times of the day and night,” the survey says.

Public transport, buses and roadsides are reported as spaces where women and girls face high levels of sexual harassment.

Most women who were surveyed said buses were the most unsafe form of transport.

Many said the Metro system, which used to be safer earlier, is now equally crowded and unsafe.

The report says the most common forms of harassment are “verbal (passing lewd comments), visual (staring and leering) and physical (touching or groping or leaning over)”.

Women of all classes have to put up with harassment in their daily lives, but students between 15 and 19 years old and women employed in the informal sector are specially vulnerable, the survey says.

The findings come from a “Safe Cities Baseline Survey” of more than 5,000 people who were interviewed during Jan – March of this year, and the survey was commissioned by the NGO Jagori/Safe Delhi, the United Nations Development Fund for Women, and UN Habitat.

The report findings are unsurprising since a study conducted last fall showed that 96 percent of women surveyed in Delhi are afraid to be in public alone because of the high rates of harassment and risk of assault (view a newsclip about the study).

Also,  another survey of women in Delhi from earlier this year tracked their experiences in specific areas of the city and found that 1/3 of the women faced verbal harassment and half of the women felt unsafe there. Several recommendations came out of that survey, including traffic monitoring.

Like most big cities, men’s harassment of women in public places is clearly a huge problem and one that impedes women’s mobility and equality with men. Thankfully, groups like the UN and Jagori/Safe Delhi are addressing this reality.

In addition to surveying people and writing reports, Jagori/Safe Delhi is doing great ground work to make the city safer for women.

  • In June they held trainings on sexual harassment for bus authorities, who are now training the bus driver staff.
  • They’re holding trainings for women about safety measures in August.
  • They’re co-hosting the Third International Conference on Women’s Safety: Building Inclusive Cities, November 22 – 24, 2010 in New Delhi.

Also, check out some of their humorous anti-sexual harassment PSAs on YouTube.

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Filed Under: News stories Tagged With: eve teasing, inclusive cities, Jagori, Safe Delhi, sexual harassment, UN Habitat, UNIFEM, women's safety

“This is the proper response.”

July 8, 2010 By Contributor

Walking down the street, an older guy standing on the corner held out a publication toward me.

“Wanna buy one, sweetie?”

“No thanks, and don’t call me ‘sweetie.'” My standard response.

He surprised me by answering sincerely, “Oh, I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to disrespect you.”

Thank you!

See, creepy guys who get angry when I tell you not to call me “angel,” “honey,” and “sweetheart?” This is the proper response.

– Cate Burlington

Location: Capitol Hill, Seattle, WA

Share your street harassment story today and help raise awareness about the problem. Include your location and it will be added to the Street Harassment Map.

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Filed Under: Stories, street harassment Tagged With: don't call me sweetie, inappropriately using pet names, proper response, street harassment

Speak up – you can save other people

July 7, 2010 By Contributor

[Editor’s note: The following was posted in a comment on another story and I think it deserves its own post]

Today I took the subway in the middle of the afternoon to go run some errands.  I was inside of the train at Yonge and Eglinton station when a man standing beside me touched my upper part and whispered something in my ear. I got scared and I pushed him off…and moved towards the people. The subway was stopped for few minutes at that station when it happened.

The man got off the subway and disappeared. I thought nothing of it… Just that maybe he wanted to flirt, but then I saw him bug another lady on the platform.  That is when I decided to report him to the Authorities because I thought that he might escalate his intentions and do something even worse to someone else or someone weaker like a kid.  Or attack in the middle of the night. Who knows!! This happened in the middle of the afternoon!! With lots of people around… who know what he is capable of doing when there is no one around.

I am very satisfied with how police and the TTC Authorities handle the harassment. They made me feel confident that I made the right decision.  I actually feel happy to live in a place like Toronto. I feel safe because Police are really looking out for you….

So I encourage everyone who might be in a similar situation to SPEAK UP!!! You don’t lose anything and can save other people!

– TS

Location: Toronto subway

Share your street harassment story today and help raise awareness about the problem. Include your location and it will be added to the Street Harassment Map.

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Filed Under: Stories, street harassment Tagged With: reporting a harasser, street harassment, toronto, TTC Authority

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