Stop Street Harassment

Making Public Spaces Safe and Welcoming

Archives for February 2011

“He kept following me in his car…trying to get me in his car despite me refusing”

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I was walking home from the store and I heard car honks. My mind didn’t automatically think the honking was toward me. It blared again and I turned around to see a guy in a car following me.

He yelled out, asking me for my address and if he can take me home. I told him politely I don’t give my address to strangers and I’m not comfortable getting into strangers’ cars.

He then yelled his name at me and said he’s not trying to find out where I live. Um, ok.

I had to go into a store because he kept following me in his car for at least three blocks, trying to get me in his car despite me refusing.

– Anonymous

Location: Chicago, IL

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Participate in a study for Dr. Fairchild’s research

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Dr. Kimberly Fairchild is working on another study that’s relevant to making public places safer and she needs your help!  Here’s her request:
In this study, you will watch a short, randomly selected video of an individual and make decisions and predictions about his/her behavior and emotions.  The survey should take approximately 20 minutes to complete and all responses are strictly anonymous. http://www.surveymonkey.com/s/InternetResearch

Thanks for helping out with this important academic study.
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Valentine’s Day advice for how not to be a street harasser!

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The Snoopy Store

With people like James Norton making a living from teaching men how to approach women, I think it’s very important to supplement that with advice on how to approach women without being a harasser!

Here’s an excerpt from a Guardian article I penned to do just that:

While perhaps obvious, the most important factor is treating the person with respect. Do not use insults or sexually objectifying language. A hello, smile or gender-neutral small talk that does not include comments about their appearance (at least, not right away) are rarely going to offend anyone and can open up the door to further conversation. Avoid familiar terms like “baby”, “honey” or “love”. While some people may not find that offensive, many do.

Make sure there is consent in your interaction. Does their body language, including eye contact (not lack thereof), and tone of voice indicate they want to interact with you, too? If you are unsure, you can always ask, is it OK if I talk to you?

Consider if the context might make them feel uncomfortable if you approach them. For example, is it dark out or a deserted area? Are you larger or older than them? Are you with friends while they are alone? If any of these factors apply, be aware that they may feel a little unsafe or unsure if you approach. So make it clear that you mean no harm and then leave them alone if they look uncomfortable.

Do not curse, insult or hurt a person who turns you down. Most of the time, people in public do not want to meet or even talk to someone. They want to get from point A to B or enjoy fresh air. They may be in a hurry or be preoccupied. Therefore, chances are that a person you approach is not going to want to talk to you or interact with you. That has nothing to do with you personally.

Talking with young men about appropriate stranger interactions in public is especially important. Society often suggests that in heterosexual relationships, it is men who should approach women. Men’s peers, family members and the media may tell them that it is OK, and even flattering, to be aggressive or to sexually objectify women whom they encounter (no matter the men’s or women’s sexual orientation). I doubt most men want to be harassers, but if they take these messages to heart, they may become harassers.

What advice would you give? Have you met someone on the street, at a bus stop, on public transportation, or the park? What did they do or say that made it nice instead of harassment?

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Street Harassment Snapshot: February 13, 2011

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Read stories, news articles, blog posts, and tweets about street harassment from the past week and find relevant announcements and upcoming street harassment events.

Street Harassment Stories:

I accept street harassment submissions from anywhere in the world. Share your story!

You can read new street harassment stories from the past week on:

Street Harassment in the News, on the Blogs:

Events:

Announcements:

New:

On-going:

10 Tweets from the Week:

  • nada_rama thats disappointing what happened to the new #Egypt plans ? :/RT: @EngyG sexual harassment was reported during street celebrations
  • ImJDan I’m just shocked by the fact that women can go through street harassment every.fucking.day and men are still “well whose bothering u?”
  • aaw1976 That street harassment is real @Imjdan. It happens to young girls everyday and they can be assaulted if they speak up.
  • abby_go_lucky walk down the street sans fear of harassment/degradation. can someone make that into a pithy protest slogan?! preferably one that rhymes!
  • wandofmirkwood How dare Westerners call the veil oppressive when I can’t even go out in public without getting harassed?
  • sarahsosiak Resolved: My new response to street-harassment will be an academic lecture about the economics of male attention.
  • spokenbeats Call me uptight, but I hate havng 2 deal w/street harassment on a daily basis. It gets old & it always has me on the defense
  • MagneticCrow @littlefluffycat Aw, I used to smile at strangers… But it brought me so much additional street harassment that I stopped. 🙁
  • sarahsosiak Wow. It is way too early to need to come up with snappy comebacks to street harassment.
  • DianeMassage @MTAInsider, please tell yr train conductors not 2 cat-call women as they’re getting off the train. Thx #streetharassment
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“I heard like a squirt squirt and felt something wet on my leg and again on my skirt”

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I was coming up the stairs in Columbus Circle when I felt something wet hit my skirt. Then I heard like a squirt squirt and felt something wet on my leg and again on my skirt. When I got to the top of the stairs I felt my but and smelled my hand and instantly I was disgusted. It was semen. I turned and looked and there was a lot of on my skirt and my leg. When I looked around I saw 4 men but there was no way of telling who did it.

Has anyone ever heard of this?

Who wold do that. I was so pissed I went home and changed and am still creeped out.

– Michele

Location: Columbus Circle, NYC

Share your street harassment story today and help raise awareness about the problem. Find suggestions for what YOU can do about this human rights issue.

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