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Archives for April 2011

“Hey everyone! Look at this pervert masturbating on the Metro”

April 6, 2011 By Contributor

Earlier today, I was taking the Baltimore Metro from Mondawmin to the Johns Hopkins Hospital. I was sitting alone next to the window. In between stops a guy in sunglasses and a red jacket decided to change seats and sit next to me. I thought this was strange behavior, but I did not do anything. He then put his backpack on his lap to block all the other passengers view of his lap and begin to masturbate. I think he wanted me to look at him, but I just stared out the window. He continued like this for about 10 minutes, started to breathe heavily, and then got off at the next stop.

I was so afraid, that I didn’t say anything. I wish I would have at least switched seats or gotten off the metro, but he was blocking me in and I did not want to look at him, let alone ask him to move. I am a pretty shy person, but looking back I should have had the guts to yell, “Hey everyone! Look at this pervert masturbating on the Metro.” Maybe then he would be ashamed of what he was doing.

– Elizabeth

Location: Metro, Mondawmin, Baltimore, Maryland

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Filed Under: Stories, street harassment Tagged With: gross, masturbation, sexual harassment

Guyland and the culture of street harassment

April 6, 2011 By Contributor

http://today.msnbc.msn.com/id/26317942/ns/today-books/

Michael Kimmel’s 2008 book Guyland is a great manual for male allies. It explores what he refers to as “Guyland,” an aggressive and toxic environment that young men of my generation are growing up in. It’s an environment influenced by fraternities that have misogynistic practices, sports, and conservative talk radio that broadcast constantly this message: the women’s movement, immigrants, and rich liberals are undermining long held white male privilege. It simply follows by logic that in such an atmosphere women are perceived as obstacles to be “won over” and, in turn, degraded. Kimmel offers a powerful study that sheds light on the possible attitudes that create the problems of street harassment. Stop Street Harassment offers numerous resources for men to counteract these cultural forces and bring an end to degradation in our lifetime.

Kimmel explains that in a society where the women’s movement has made significant inroads, the traditional ways of “proving” masculinity have been discredited. They are devolving into infantile acts such as encouraging their friends to “score” and employing politically incorrect speech. Stop Street Harassment offers a powerful charge to male allies to fight against such displays of masculinity and how we can work to counterbalance this disturbing cultural trend.

The cultural norms under which “Guyland” operates are becoming so ubiquitous that they can be difficult to fight. Kimmel explains that many men are afraid to question the actions of fellow guys because it may lead to their exclusion. This fear of social isolation among men is one of the reasons street harassment and other acts of violence go unchallenged. Stop Street Harassment provides techniques for men to intervene in these situations and to not be afraid due to peer pressure.

Another important issue that Kimmel addresses is the gray area that men feel in their relationships with women. What men consider to be a friendly gesture may be interpreted as predatory and the line is often vague. The Stop Street Harassment website offers men guidelines on how to interact with women to make them feel safe and unthreatened.

Kimmel’s book also hits home for me in a more personal way. As I participated in the Anti-Street Harassment Day on March 20, I kept thinking about these issues as I realized there was something wrong. Of all the members of my group I was the only male. The lack of male participation in challenging those attitudes that create street harassment is something that our generation is going to have to address. We have the opportunity to be the first generation with widespread male involvement in these issues. Kimmel’s book should be our warning shot.

– Sean Crosbie
Male Ally

This post is part of the weekly blog series by male allies. We need men involved in the work to end the social acceptability of street harassment and to stop the practice, period. If you’d like to contribute to this weekly series, please contact me.

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Filed Under: male perspective, street harassment Tagged With: gender violence, Guyland, male allies, michael kimmel, misogyn, Sean Crosbie, sexual assault, street harassment

“It was one of the most terrifying experiences of my life”

April 6, 2011 By Contributor

I have loads of experiences like this, unfortunately. Once I was waiting for my bus at 6 p.m. when an older man approached me. He started making disgusting remarks about me and I tried to ignore him. He then grabbed my behind and started to feel me up. I was 13 years old back then, and it was one of the most terrifying experiences of my life. I shouted at him but no one helped me.

More recently I was followed when I was walking home. The guy was shouting demeaning things and I was very scared. This is not cool, it should end now!

– Anonymous

Location: United Kingdom

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Filed Under: Stories, street harassment Tagged With: groper, sexual assault, street harassment

Hello world!

April 5, 2011 By HKearl

Welcome to WordPress. This is your first post. Edit or delete it, then start blogging!

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Filed Under: Uncategorized

“The only thing they ‘respected’ was if I was the property of another man”

April 5, 2011 By Contributor

Riding a city bus in Rome, I was rubbed against from behind by a man.

As with many other people this has happened to, I thought he needed more room, so I moved forward. He moved with me. This went on until I was right behind the driver.

Then I’d had more than enough. When he pressed against me again, I turned to face him & said loudly & very sternly, “Move it or lose it!!” I was a bit taller than him, so I was right in his face, scowling.

I don’t know if he understood English or just the threatening tone, but he moved away & left me alone. I was disgusted that he’d touched me like that, but proud that I made him back away.

Other times riding the bus (I was there as a college student / tourist for 2 weeks) I was approached & bothered by men and even teenage boys. I found the only thing they “respected” was if I was the property of another man… I bought & wore a cheap “wedding” ring for most of my trip. I didn’t feel too good about it – esp. since they weren’t respecting me but some fictional non-present male – but at least they left me alone with no work on my part.

– MKEgal

Location: Rome, Italy

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Filed Under: Stories, street harassment Tagged With: fake wedding ring, groping, sexual harassment, street harassment

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