Not sure if you’ll be interested in my story, but I’ll tell you anyway in the hope that someone out there might understand and change their attitudes. It’s not of a specific occurrence, more a general description.
I am male – a male with what might be described as a ‘girly’ taste in clothes. I like to wear skirts, more often than not with knee length boots. I’m not a ‘goth’ and don’t identify with any ‘fashion group’ within society – neither am I gay – neither do I dress to appear to be a girl.
So why is it that whenever I go out wearing what I want to wear, I get abuse of the ‘trannie’, ‘gayboy’ and ‘queer’ variety – usually from males ? Do those same males abuse girls wearing jeans/trousers as being ‘lesbians’ ? If not, why not – their logic to me is exactly the same!
– Anonymous
Location: In the city streets
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Jess says
It’s interesting-I think what it comes down to is men, not all of course, feel the need to exert their power and so-called superiority over whoever they can. When it comes to women they feel they need to dominate and treat us like property. I’m a hotly lesbian who has a tough time shaking off unwanted attention, and many men have told me I’m not gay and that I’ll never be gay again after a night with them.
When it comes to men with a fashion taste like yours they probably see another thing that needs to be shown who’s boss, and it’s stupid. It’s not possible for some men to keep their close-minded oinions to themselves,and truthfully I don’t know why.
Keep wearing skirts, do what you need to and want to do. In the end they’re the ones that lose because they clearly aren’t happy if they need to be powerful in a way that harms others.
Clare B says
It’s interesting that you reference women ‘wearing jeans’ and not being called lesbians. That all depends on how they wear the jeans, in my experience – if they wear jeans with boots, have short hair and are not wearing make-up they can often be shouted at in the street for being ‘lesbians’. Men seem to feel threatened when women are not dressing to specifically attract them.
I don’t want to belittle your experience, but you are lucky that it is specifically the fact that what you are wearing is unusual (for a man)that attracts comments. Women are harassed in the street no matter what they are wearing, or what they look like.
Amelia says
I’m often surprised at how rigid the fashion ‘rules’ are for men… if men wear anything that is perceived as too girly they are quickly ridiculed as ‘gay’. It is strange that we have such rigid fashion rules for men (and such a fear of effeminacy or gayness, too).
I have four brothers – the thirteen-year-old one wants to get his ear-pierced, so my other brothers were debating last night about which ear was the ‘gay’ ear. Apparently this is very important to know, but my brothers couldn’t even reach a consensus!
My thirteen-year old brother has more of a metro taste in clothes than his older brothers: his favorite pair of jeans are skinny purple ones. My sixteen year old brother feels “sick” whenever he sees him in his purple jeans – however my eighteen-year-old brother sees nothing wrong with it at all. So even among men there are different standards about what is acceptable and unacceptable.
Kelly says
The people are frightened and/or threatened by things that are different and aren’t very adaptable to societal or even fashion changes. Just ignore them if you like wearing what you wear go ahead. But to answer your question yes some men do insult women wear ‘masculine’ clothing including regular pants or they appear or act too ‘masculine’ because they perceive them to be a ‘bitch’ ‘dyke’ or ‘butch’, this is course because they are threatened by women who don’t fit their narrow standards.
David says
Those who think that men wearing skirts means “the end of the world” need to see a psychologist. They are mentally ill.
Mara says
As Kelly already said, people are threatened when some is different…. I want to ad “when they notice it”. It is just the education they have.
Going back to the beginning of this blog, this boy/man seems to me has just to forgot something: Why is he caring about what other people might think or say?
I noticed a male teacher two years ago who is wearing daily skirts and kilts to school, and the students like it. They learned that skirted garments already a males garment since thousands of years because peole in ancient time were much more related to that what are the body needs, and that is definitely not pants for male persons.
People should say how great a man looks in a male skirt, how strong he is going in public with it and how confident he shows.
That is the reality we should focus, not dump and stupid talking and let other people know what hey might be in some brains.
Blake says
I am in my 40’s….straight,which has NOTHING to do with a guy wearing a skirt.I have a few myself.Pleated are the best.So comfortable and a natural feeling.They are a mini skirt but not the mini MINI skirt that you think of,like what a stripper would wear They are like a tennis skirt style.
Rooster says
I don’t get it either….
For a long time I thought that the fact that I am simply MORE COMFORTABLE in a denim skirt than in a pair of denim jeans was a BAD THING.
I thought it meant I was transgendered…
I thought it meant I was a bad person… etc etc…
No truth is, it’s just a piece of clothing.
As the old saying goes, Its not the clothes that make the man
It’s the MAN that makes the clothes.
You keep wearing what you want to wear, and don’t let them get you down brother.