I went to London for New Year’s Eve, and it was on the Tube going back to my friend’s student accommodation that I had my first street harassment experience of the year.
It was very busy, so we were all standing up and in close quarters to each other. I had seen a man to my left but I had ignored him in favour of taking my rucksack [backpack] off and holding onto the pole in the carriage to keep myself from falling over. I heard a voice from that area saying, “Happy New Year,” repeatedly, and I gave a non committal hum before ignoring him and facing my friend.
The talking at me continued, until he felt it was perfectly acceptable to rest his head on my shoulder while the train was moving. He kept on trying to get my attention by asking which stop I was getting off at, and I kept on ignoring him, as this is my preferred method of dealing with idiots trying to harass me.
As the train pulled into the next station, he upped his technique by grabbing my upper arm and squeezing it repeatedly and saying, “Hey, hey, look at me, where are you going? Where are you getting off?”
Honestly, it scared me. It was a very packed train, but no one could hear him as he was being so quiet. My heart pounded and my grip on my bag tightened, I was ready to swing it at him if he persisted, and I turned to him and replied with
“Home. Now leave me alone.”
He opened his mouth to say more, before my friend wheeled round and told him to back off before she punched him in the face. He stopped and we left the Tube two stations early in order to avoid travelling with him further.
I spent the rest of the trip home shaken and outraged, but also frightened in case he had followed us. He hadn’t appeared drunk like so many other revelers. Things could have been very different; instead of backing off he could have followed us. Fortunately he didn’t, but you always go through the “What if?” scenarios in your head.
– Anonymous
Location: London, England
Share your street harassment story today and help raise awareness about the problem.
Find suggestions for what YOU can do about this human rights issue.
Concealed Weapon says
Here’s what I would say to the harasser (“you” = the harasser), since he’d probably try to claim that what he did was not harassment.
“””I heard a voice from that area saying, “Happy New Year,” repeatedly, and I gave a non committal hum before ignoring him and facing my friend.”””
Simply saying “Happy New Year” is not harassment, as long as the person saying it does not expect a response. In this case, you said it repeatedly, and expected a response, so it is harassment.
“””until he felt it was perfectly acceptable to rest his head on my shoulder while the train was moving”””
Now you’re crossing the line from verbal harassment to assault. This may have been acceptable if you knew her, as long as you stopped if she wanted you to.
“””He kept on trying to get my attention by asking which stop I was getting off at.”””
This may be a good thing to say to someone you are having a conversation with, not someone who is trying to ignore you. In this case, it is more like a stalking threat.
“””As the train pulled into the next station, he upped his technique by grabbing my upper arm and squeezing it repeatedly and saying, “Hey, hey, look at me, where are you going? Where are you getting off?””””
This would be abusive if you did it to your girlfriend, and you don’t even know her! I really hope you don’t have a girlfriend.