Archives for May 2014

Posted on Reddit:

“Today, my mother and I went to the beach. I’m a 20-some woman and she’s a fairly hot lady herself, no lie. Obviously this means we were around other girls in bikinis, par for the course. I was lying face down on a blanket and my mother was lying face up, just enjoying the weather.

We heard this whirring noise above us and I looked up and saw a remote-controlled plane–one of the square ones that can move really articulately in all directions. No big deal. I turned back down and napped more.

Then I noticed: a. It was getting really close to women. Like, straight up in their asses close, flying really low, staying there for probably three minutes at a time, and b. it had a camera on it.

It then decided to target my mother and I and hovered over us. I got mad and decided that, fuck this, I was going to throw a water bottle at it and take it down (not the best choice, sure, yeah, I know) and it immediately backed up when I advanced on it. So I knew the operator was nearby. Sure enough, there were two men up on the dunes nearby holding the remote, so I put on all my clothes first and then ran up to them. The person holding the remote was probably sixteen; the other was what I can only assume was his father. He was around forty-some. He was also giving the younger kid directions.

So I walked up to the older man and said “That is seriously creepy.”

“What?”

“You flying around your creep drone is really fucking creepy.”

“It isn’t going to hurt you.” He sort of laughed at me now, and I saw red here.

“I’m not worried about my PERSONAL SAFETY, though I am now worried a bit for YOURS. Your drone is creepy and violating. You need to take it out of the air, or I will.”

“Fine, it won’t go near you”

“No, I need it out of the sky. Now. You are violating every woman on this beach. Get it out of the sky.”

He actually got the kid to call it back and packed it up. Even so, I left. I am so mad that I was violated in that way–and the potentials for anyone else being violated that way.”

I was walking to class one morning and an attractive young woman walked past myself and another man. Immediately, he started to shout suggestive lines at her (she ignored him and kept walking) and then he began to shout very offensive things toward her and I had heard enough of it! I turned to him and asked, “What in the world is wrong with you?! That could be my sister!”

He saw I was angry and apologized. I ran and caught up to the young lady and told her that I was sorry she went through that on behalf of my gender. She said, “Its okay” as if it was something she endures everyday. I said, “No it’s not okay” I wanted to keep chatting with her, but I had to get to class. I hope wherever she is she doesn’t have to get used to that kinda thing.

What can we do create more street respect?

I think you have to reach out to men more. The only people that can make the creeps stop is the good men out there. The only problem is a good man doesn’t himself know for certain what is and is not appropriate. He feels it in his gut, but no one ever says anything so rarely do they intervene and are more likely to keep quite when those males around them act creepy.

Honestly, I would suggest holding workshops on appropriate ways of addressing women (Something never taught in schools).

– Richard S.

Location: Outside of the Brooklyn College Campus, NY

I was walking by a local park at 9.30 on a Sunday morning with my hood up (as it was drizzling), when a man crossed the road and began walking quickly behind me. I got the impression he was following me, so I veered to the right to pause and look at my phone, while noticing out of my periphery him turning to see what I looked like as he walked by. I remained where I was until he walked on. I then carried on walking but slowed my pace and shortly after, about ten metres ahead of me, he turned around, walked towards me and said, “Hey, I’ll lick your pussy every night, every night,” to which I instinctively responded “Get away!” and he carried on walking past.

This could have gone very differently I realised afterwards. He was about 15 years my senior and rather built, but I am tall for a girl, but what this indicates is the context is irrelevant, the objective blatant. His pursuit was already in motion before even catching a glimpse of me, aside from my outline. He knew my gender, that was all. There have been countless occasions in which I have been cat-called on the street (not as confrontational as this instance, but it is the same).

Do you have any suggestions for dealing with harassers and/or ending street harassment in general?

Until the persistently objectifying media stops dehumanizing women, until men stop dehumanising women, the only thing you can do is walk away, speak up, raise awareness and challenge the naturalisation of harassment. Most importantly, tell men this is never acceptable.

– MW

Location: Albert Park in Middlesbrough, UK

Sharing our street harassment stories can be so powerful, but it’s not always easy to do, especially in a public setting.

That’s why I really admire Raquel Reichard, SSH’s former social media volunteer (who is now doing contract work for the SSH national report coming out on June 3), who wrote an article for The New York Times about her street harassment experiences and how they intersect with her recovery from an eating disorder. She ends her piece with some hard questions that I don’t have the answers to, but wish I did.

Via The New York Times:

“…Street harassment is a part of my everyday life. And I know I’m not the only one. This is also the reality of countless New Yorkers. So many women in New York City who walk out of their buildings, jump on a subway, head to school, commute to work, jog through a park or grab a bite to eat will deal with some form of street harassment, whether it’s annoying like leering and whistling, or illegal like stalking and sexual touching.

I’m just 23 years old, and I’ve dealt with all of that. But even knowing that the women in this city are surely experiencing the same street harassment that I meet most times I walk out of my building, I still feel isolated and helpless during each encounter.

Even on a crowded block, when my body is threatened, I feel alone. The strong and empowered woman that took years to build loses control, resembling the vulnerable girl struggling with bulimia.

What do you do, then, when you want to fight back against street harassment but you literally fear for your life?

How do you deal with that sense of failure that creeps in when you had the chance to school someone on sexism and the objectification of women but you let your anxiety get the best of you?

How can you truly get over an eating disorder when your fear of the men outside and the potential for sexual harassment keep you in a painfully familiar state of hunger, apprehension and self-loathing?”

Street harassment is a complex issue. It touches each of us in different ways. Through our stories, we can collectively better understand the issue — and then work collectively to end it.

We may feel alone in the moment of harassment, but we’re not. There are thousands of us speaking out and more will join us because of our stories.