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Archives for August 2014

National Sexual Assault Conference 2014

August 20, 2014 By HKearl

I’m at the National Sexual Assault Conference in Pittsburgh today to present the workshop “Getting Public Transit Systems to Address Sexual Harassment/Assault” with one of my mentors and long-time, amazing activists, Marty Langelan.

We’re looking forward to a lot of important conversations and hope we can see anti-harassment campaigns on transit systems spread nation-wide!

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Filed Under: Events

USA: Exercising Outdoors While Female

August 20, 2014 By Correspondent

Lorna M. Hartman, Spokane, WA, SSH Blog Correspondent

Image via Shooting Truth Bullets

The discussion has begun on the street harassment women experience when they exercise outdoors. Articles here, here and here (one by our own Holly Kearl here at SSH) describe this type of harassment, and plenty more are a Google search away.

Yet the pushback against this aspect of harassment is considerable. Exhibit A is the comment section of any article on street harassment of women exercising in public spaces.

Kearl’s article cited above gets this gem: “v9988, I don’t make cat calls towards woman and I don’t condone it. On a list of problems that a person could have, cat calls should be near the bottom. If common cat calls bother her then she should grow a thicker skin … She should be happy that she has the ability to run and is pretty enough to get a cat call once in a while. I used to run when I was younger and as a straight man I did not enjoy the occasional cat call that I got from men but it was no big deal.”

A couple of comments down, the attitude continues: “Wait til you lose your looks, become middle aged and the male attention stops. Then you’ll really have something to complain about. Lighten up honey. Not every woman considers a wolf whistle dangerous harassment. Geez. Lemme guess, you majored in ‘Wymyn’s Studies’ in college. Men are the enemy!”

Several more comments down there’s this excerpt: “If you choose to just run along the side of the road in spandex or tight shorts, you will receive catcalls. That is just human nature.”

A 2012 article titled “Running With Breasts: Why Won’t Men Leave Me Alone When I’m Jogging?” by Philadelphia writer Erica Palan describes her experiences jogging in public areas. First comment: “Another woman complaining about her boobs! There doesn’t seem to be one woman on this planet who likes her own boobs (or anyone else’s) … ” and it goes downhill for several paragraphs.

Writer Maghen Nicole says, “As a young, female cyclist, my safety and right to access transportation with dignity has been compromised by traffic and pedestrians,” in her article “Harassing Me While I’m Biking Is Still Street Harassment” published in mid-August this year.

She goes on to say, ““Street harassment is yet another way for men to exert their power over women, far too often without question or consequence. Cyclists have had enough. Women have had enough … cases as extreme as passengers in cars reaching out to touch and grab women biking have been reported … women have reported men making uncomfortable and offensive comments about the way they were seated on their bikes.”

Her article was met with responses such as:

* “Should you be harassed no. Is cat calling really so bad that it makes you feel un-safe? If it does make you feel that way you better just stay home with your mommy while she cooks you din-din”
* “So much women’s studies jargon just to complain about someone saying something to you.”
* “Words are words; learn to be an adult and not some sniveling 12 year old … Now it’s ‘Sticks & stones will break my bones; Words will devastate my inner child, because I’m sniveling cry baby!’”

A blogger named Mountaineer created a Twitter handle called @offsideplays where women can share their experiences of being harassed while bicycling.

She wrote, “Since I created Offside Plays (@offsideplays) as a site to expose the everyday discrimination (e.g. racism, sexism, homophobia etc.) that takes place in sport and exercise nothing has caught my attention more than the harassment that women face while biking … I am consistently surprised by the amount and type of harassment/abuse faced by women on their bikes.”

How do we raise the social and legal costs of harassing outdoor exercisers simply for being female in a public space?

* Push back verbally if it’s safe to do so—both men and women can do this.
* Report physical contact by harassers to police, whether it happens to you or whether you observed it happening to someone else. A harasser moving into someone’s physical space and touching them is breaking the law.
* Advocate for police to have training on what street harassment really is and what it’s really like, and expect police to follow it up when you report a physical assault or stalking situation.
* Press charges when we have opportunity to do so, if we can afford it financially and emotionally.
* Share your stories with friends and family. It gives them the choice: They can either voice their support, or lose the ability to be in denial.

Post your stories to public online places like @offsideplays, the Hollaback website and Hollaback iPhone and Droid apps, following Twitter account @EndStHarassment and tweets tagged #endstreetharassment, following and submitting your stories to StopStreetHarassment and Fuck You Street Harassment on Tumblr, and many more.

There’s a lot of work to do before women exercising outdoors are treated with the respect due to any human being. But we are doing the work, and we can achieve the goal with perseverance.

Lorna is raising three young, kindhearted male allies and has worked on rape and interpersonal violence since the 1990s, including serving on the local rape hotline, answering calls, and driving to emergency rooms to advocate for victims and connect them with resources they needed.

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Filed Under: correspondents, Stories, street harassment

Street Harassment is NOT a compliment

August 19, 2014 By HKearl

I am really floored that after the NY Post published an article about street harassment being flattering (and women should just deal with it), major outlets like USA Today, Time and Salon.com all ran pieces this afternoon disagreeing, as did sites like Bustle, the Frisky,

This would never have happened a few years ago, hell maybe not even last year. This is an incredible shift in how street harassment is viewed!! WOW. Let’s keep speaking out!

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Filed Under: News stories, street harassment

“Seriously, your breasts look delicious.”

August 19, 2014 By Contributor

I was at Otakon (an anime convention) with my friend a few weeks ago and we decided to cosplay. We were both wearing low cut dresses because it’s hot outside and it worked for our costumes. The people at the convention were nothing but nice to us luckily, but as a lot of cosplayers know walking around the city outside of the convention center invites a lot of attention from strangers… which is typically pretty understandable when people ask to take your picture or ask you about the character you’re dressed like.

Outside of the convention center on our way to grab lunch a man approached us in the crosswalk and said, “I just want you ladies to know that your breasts look amazing. Has anyone told you that today?” I wanted to reply, “No, no one else has been that rude,” but I just laughed him off because I was in a good mood and didn’t want to start a fight with a stranger in a crosswalk. Then he told us that he saw us walking and HAD to get out of his car to tell us how great our breasts look… as if he wouldn’t be able to sleep at night if no one commented on our boobs today.

I mustered, “Um thaaaanks?” as sarcastically as I could and we kept walking. He ended on, “Seriously, your breasts look delicious.”

I was grossed out and really alarmed that someone would get out of their car at a red light to harass women in a crosswalk. We laughed that he would have been slicker to just ask to take our picture and not comment on our breasts because we probably would have said yes (since we were in costume after all) and he could have had a photo to remember our “delicious” breasts by.

Not an hour later, another guy did exactly that. He approached us, said we looked beautiful and asked to take our picture and as he was taking it we noticed the camera slide down from our faces towards our chests. We probably wouldn’t have noticed had we not just joked about how the other guy should have done that to be more “slick.” If I was alone I would have been scared, but with my friend there I was able to just laugh it off. I’m seriously considering bringing my husband next year to avoid getting harassed again, even though he really isn’t that interested in attending the convention.

Optional: What’s one way you think we can make public places safer for everyone?

The only way street harassment is going to stop is if we share our stories and shine a light on this kind of behavior. We need to let people know that this is NOT okay and that’s never going to happen if we keep sweeping it under the rug.

– Anonymous

Location: Baltimore, MD

Share your street harassment story for the blog.
See the book 50 Stories about Stopping Street Harassers for more idea

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Filed Under: Stories, street harassment

“I see. Sorry, I’m not interested.”

August 18, 2014 By Contributor

I was standing at the intersection near my apartment, waiting for the light to change. I’m autistic, and was flicking my fingers in front of me. I may have given the impression I was stoned.

A man walked up to me and asked, “Are you going to HempFest?”

I said, “No.”

“Do you want to go to HempFest?” he asked.

“No.”

“Let’s get coffee.”

“I’m not interested.”

“Well, you see, my therapist told me that when I met somebody I thought was attractive I should just go up to them and ask them out. I thought you seemed really nice and attractive. You don’t understand how big a step this is for me.”

“I see. Sorry, I’m not interested.” (There are so many ways I could have said, “Your therapist is wrong and you are creepy.” I did not feel safe enough to do any of them in the moment. I apologize if this makes me a Bad Feminist.)

“Well, I’m interested in doing anything outdoors.”

“I’m already in a relationship.”

He immediately got apologetic and said, “Sorry. I didn’t know. Have a great day!” He left right after that. Because my repeated statements that I was 100% not interested were obviously meaningless, so long as I’m designated Available.

– KA

Location: Seattle, WA, USA

Share your street harassment story for the blog.
See the book 50 Stories about Stopping Street Harassers for more idea

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Filed Under: Stories, street harassment

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