• About Us
    • What Is Street Harassment?
    • Why Stopping Street Harassment Matters
    • Meet the Team
      • Board of Directors
      • Past Board Members
    • In The Media
  • Our Work
    • National Street Harassment Hotline
    • International Anti-Street Harassment Week
    • Blog Correspondents
      • Past SSH Correspondents
    • Safe Public Spaces Mentoring Program
    • Publications
    • National Studies
    • Campaigns against Companies
    • Washington, D.C. Activism
  • Our Books
  • Donate
  • Store

Stop Street Harassment

Making Public Spaces Safe and Welcoming

  • Facebook
  • Instagram
  • Pinterest
  • Tumblr
  • Twitter
  • YouTube
  • Home
  • Blog
    • Harassment Stories
    • Blog Correspondents
    • Street Respect Stories
  • Help & Advice
    • National Street Harassment Hotline
    • Dealing With Harassers
      • Assertive Responses
      • Reporting Harassers
      • Bystander Responses
      • Creative Responses
    • What to Do Before or After Harassment
    • Street Harassment and the Law
  • Resources
    • Definitions
    • Statistics
    • Articles & Books
    • Anti-Harassment Groups & Campaigns
    • Male Allies
      • Educating Boys & Men
      • How to Talk to Women
      • Bystander Tips
    • Video Clips
    • Images & Flyers
  • Take Community Action
  • Contact

Archives for September 2014

“I encourage every one not to turn a blind eye when someone needs your help”

September 28, 2014 By Contributor

I’ve been commuting to and from my house since I reached high school. I’ve had my fair share of catcalls and whistles. I did not mind those men because in my mind I am above them.

When I graduated high school, I went to a college that is far from our home but still I commute everyday. I ride a bus going to college and going back home.

One morning, I rode the bus like I always do. I chose a seat that’s far from the driver’s seat, though it is not all the way at the back of the bus. If you have been in Manila, you’ll know that the buses will be full of people. At one point, a man dressed appropriately like he is going to his office sat beside me. At first, he just sat there not minding me. But as the ride went on, he started feeling me. He was trying to touch my breast. My instinct was to scoot farther from him, closer to the window. I was very afraid because he was also making sounds that I thought he was pleasuring himself under his jacket that was strategically placed on his lap. The bus was full and even the aisle have people standing. I know someone could hear him because he was not quiet but they did not do anything. They turned a blind eye. After a while, the man alighted from the bus. That’s when I realized that my phone was missing.

I was not only harassed, I was also robbed. I did not reported it to the police because no one helped me. When I screamed that I was robbed, the people looked at me like I was disturbing them. All I felt that time was their apathetic stares.

That is why I am very vocal about my stand on any form of harassment. And I encourage every one not to turn a blind eye when someone needs your help especially in the streets because no one should feel alone.

– L.

Location: Bus. Manila, Philippines

Share your street harassment story for the blog.
See the book 50 Stories about Stopping Street Harassers for more idea

Share

Filed Under: Stories, street harassment

“Once it hurts their pocketbook they may think twice about it”

September 27, 2014 By Contributor

I stopped at the store on my way to the gym yesterday. From the time I got out of my car to the time I got back (less than 5 minutes) I got 1 underhanded “WOW”, 1 “You got nice figure (sic)” and numerous disrobing stares. For crying out loud, can I get my power bar in peace, gym clothes or not? I feel like I have to bow my head and stare at the ground, because if I don’t the harassment gets even worse. Or maybe it’s the same, I just don’t see it with my head down.

On another occasion I was with my 7-year-old daughter at Home Depot when she said: “Mom, that man was staring at your butt.” They don’t even have the decency to control themselves when I’m with my daughter?

Optional: What’s one way you think we can make public places safer for everyone?

Pass city ordinances making it a misdemeanor for honking at someone without cause. Same for catcalls. Fine the idiots. Once it hurts their pocketbook they may think twice about it, although that still wouldn’t stop the stares.

– Regina

Location: Publix, Pembroke Pines, FL

Share your street harassment story for the blog.
See the book 50 Stories about Stopping Street Harassers for more idea

Share

Filed Under: Stories, street harassment

“I try not to go anywhere at all alone.”

September 27, 2014 By Contributor

I unfortunately have too many stories to share. But the ones that stand out most in my head are all the same. I’m walking alone (in my neighborhood, to my car, into a building) and see a group of males. I immediately become nervous (I have anxiety disorders). I try to find another way around, or try to walk by as fast and as quietly as I can so they don’t notice me. But they always do. They always completely stop what they’re doing, stand up, move towards me and say “Damn!” as I pass. I pass in shame, with my head hung low, wishing I could disappear. They make me feel degraded, threatened, nervous, and in complete danger. It’s gotten to the point where I try not to go anywhere at all alone. It’s not ok.

Optional: What’s one way you think we can make public places safer for everyone?

It’s time society begins to teach males new ways to interact with women that do not make them feel threatened, degraded, objectified, or uncomfortable. It’s parents’ responsibility, and the responsibility of other men at this point, because nobody is listening to the women who are speaking out against it. We get brushed off, or ridiculed, or accused of overreacting to a “compliment”. It’s not ok to allow this to continue.

– Feliz

Location: Santa Fe, New Mexico

Share your street harassment story for the blog.
See the book 50 Stories about Stopping Street Harassers for more idea

Share

Filed Under: Stories, street harassment

“All I can say is thank God I made it home alive.”

September 26, 2014 By Contributor

This has just happened around 1 hour ago.

So me and my friend were going on a walk around 11:00 and our neighbourhood is generally pretty nice and quiet because it’s all old people that live on my street.

But tonight was much different. We were walking and as we were walking by this house there was a man in the shadows on a bike just staring at us. I’ll never forget the look he gave us.  So we walked a bit faster and as we walked faster he got on his bike and chased us so we ran as fast as possible and he wouldn’t stop following us until we got to a steep hill with a lot of speed bumps.

From there we ran down the hill and ran the 3 streets away to my home. He just disappeared after that so I got my friend’s mom to drive by to see if he is was still in those shadows waiting and sure enough he as. He has been sitting there for about 2 hours and I’m freaking out. I’m very close to calling the cops.

All I can say is thank God I made it home alive.

– Anonymous

Location: Toronto, Ontario, Canada, in the Keele and Lawrence area

Share your street harassment story for the blog.
See the book 50 Stories about Stopping Street Harassers for more idea

Share

Filed Under: Stories, street harassment

Bolivia: “Si no te silba un albañil, quiere decir que eres fea”

September 26, 2014 By Correspondent

Andrea Flores Hernández, Santa Cruz, Bolivia, SSH Blog Correspondent

“Agitadoras Sociales” on Facebook. By: “More Nada”

Escuché ese dicho meses atrás, de parte de una compañera de universidad. Quisiera decir que le discutí esa afirmación, que le demostré argumentos que mostraran el craso error en el que ella se encontraba, pero no lo hice. La frase me dejó sorprendida. Esa frase me mostró cómo el acoso callejero está tan inmerso en nuestra vida cotidiana que ya lo encontramos usual. Algo “inevitable” de todos los días. Y quizá por encontrarlo tan común, es que en Bolivia poco se habla de este problema.

¿Desde cuándo el acoso callejero comenzó a formar parte de aquello que las personas consideran “común”? o peor aún, ¿desde cuándo las mujeres se han acostumbrado a esto?

Sé que no son todas las que consideran normal caminar por la calle y recibir silbidos o miradas lascivas. He presenciado con gran admiración a mujeres que no se quedaron calladas ante tal acoso. Aquellas mujeres son las que han dicho “basta” a esta situación y dejaron de sentirse culpables por algo que ellas no provocaban.

Escribir acerca de esto es fácil, pero vivirlo no lo es. Para decir “basta”, una mujer ha tenido que pasar por un largo proceso para entender que no es su culpa. Que no es culpa de la falda corta que usa, que no es culpa de su cuerpo, que no es culpa de su manera de caminar. Ha tenido que soportar durante años silbidos, frases sexuales, comentarios denigrantes e incluso manoseos de parte de hombres que no entendían que el cuerpo de esa mujer no era de su propiedad. Ha tenido que dejarse de ver como la causante del problema, para entender al fin que ella es la única víctima.

Todo esto no significa que una vez que la mujer se da cuenta de aquello, los hombres comenzarán a respetarla en la calle. Nunca sucede así. Es más, a veces, recién comienza  a llegar lo peor. Porque cuando una mujer responde a un silbido, a un comentario, o hace algo al respecto; el hombre lo toma como un chiste, o se siente amenazado en su “derecho” de dirigirse de esa manera a una mujer, e intensifica su agresión.

Y lo admirable de todo esto, es que estas mujeres no se rinden. Ellas saben muy bien que no son las culpables. Ellas reclaman el derecho de circular libremente por las calles sin ningún tipo de comentario acerca de su cuerpo.  Estas mujeres tienen fuego en los ojos y no permiten que nadie las denigre. Ellas entienden que aún falta mucho camino por recorrer para que hombres y mujeres comprendan el porqué de su lucha. Una lucha con una premisa tan simple pero demoledora: “El cuerpo que tengo, es mío”. Y yo, como mujer que ha sufrido este tipo de acoso durante bastante tiempo, me uno a la lucha. Porque, aunque parezca increíble, muchos hombres todavía no se dan cuenta de que cuando una mujer sale a las calles, no es para entretenerlo. No se dan cuenta de que ellos no tienen ningún derecho sobre nuestro cuerpo, no pueden denigrarlo, insultarlo, comentarlo ni tocarlo sin nuestro permiso. Nosotras tenemos el derecho de vestirnos como queramos, de sentirnos atractivas sin que eso sea motivo de acoso.

Y, con respecto a la frase “Si no te silba un albañil, quiere decir que eres fea”; en caso de que no me silbe, no me sentiré “fea”. Me sentiré libre; libre de circular por las calles sin miedo a nada. Porque en esa situación, podré ver que nuestra lucha, está dando resultado.

Andrea is in her second year of university, studying Social Communication. You can follow her on Twitter: @AndreaFlores116

Bolivia: “If a construction worker does not cat-call you, you are ugly”

I heard that expression months ago from a college classmate. I would like to say that I discussed her affirmation, I showed her some arguments that could let her know that she was mistaken, but I did not do anything. That phrase really surprised me. That expression demonstrates to me how greatly street harassment is immersed in our daily life. It was so “usual”, something almost “inevitable”. And maybe because of that thought, in Bolivia people do not talk too much of this issue.

Since when did street harassment form part of what we consider “normal”? Or worse, since when did women consider “normal” to be street harassment?

I know that not all women find it “usual” to walk down the street being cat-called. I have seen women that were not silent by street harassment. Those women are who have said “enough” to that situation and they stopped feeling guilty about something they did not provoke.

Writing about this issue is easy, but living it is not. To say “enough”, a woman has had to go through a long process to understand that is not her fault. That it is not the fault of the short skirt that she is wearing, that it is not the fault of her body, and that it is not the fault of the way she walks. A woman who has had to endure years of cat-calls, sexual phrases, and even degrading comments from men who did not understand that the body of the woman was not his property. She has had to leave, watching herself as the cause of the problem, to understand that she was only the victim.

This does not mean that once a woman realizes this that the man begins to respect her on the street. It never happens like that. Moreover, sometimes, it just gets worse. Because when a woman responds to cat-calls, comments, or does something about it; the man takes it as a joke, or he feels threatened in his “right” to treat a woman that way, and he intensifies his harassment.

And what is admirable in all of this, is that these women do not surrender. They know very well that they are not guilty of this situation. They claim the right to move freely in the streets without any comment about their body. These women have fire in their eyes and they do not let anybody denigrate them. They know that there is still a long way to go before men and women understand why they fight. A fight with a premise so simple but devastating: “The body that I have is mine”.

And I, as a woman who has suffered such harassment for quite some time, I join the fight. Because, incredibly, many men still do not realize that when a woman goes out to the streets, it is not to entertain them. They do not realize that they have no right on our bodies, and they cannot denigrate, cat-call, nor touch us without our permission. We have the right to dress like we want, to feel attractive without that causing street harassment.

And with regard to the phrase “If a construction worker does not cat-call you, you are ugly”, I say that if he does not cat-call me, I will not feel “ugly”. I will feel free. Free to walk on the streets without the fear of being harassed. And I will see, in that moment, that our fight, is working.

Andrea is in her second year of university, studying Social Communication. You can follow her on Twitter: @AndreaFlores116

Share

Filed Under: correspondents, Stories, street harassment

« Previous Page
Next Page »

Share Your Story

Share your street harassment story for the blog. Donate Now

From the Blog

  • #MeToo 2024 Study Released Today
  • Join International Anti-Street Harassment Week 2022
  • Giving Tuesday – Fund the Hotline
  • Thank You – International Anti-Street Harassment Week 2021
  • Share Your Story – Safecity and Catcalls Collaboration

Buy the Book

  • Contact
  • Events
  • Join Us
  • Donate
  • Facebook
  • Instagram
  • Pinterest
  • Tumblr
  • Twitter
  • YouTube

Copyright © 2025 Stop Street Harassment · Website Design by Sarah Marie Lacy