Fasiha Farrukh, Pakistan, SSH Blog Correspondent
“While standing at the street corner of a crowded residential area in an early evening, I was waiting for auto rickshaw to arrive so I would not have to walk to my friend’s place. It took pretty long for any public vehicle to show up at that side; still I continued to wait as the distance was quite lengthy to the house. It was quite uncomfortable to stand there and wait. I noticed strange stares in my direction. I was unsure if they were staring at me because of my dress or because I had been standing there alone for a long time.
I was dressed appropriate to the surroundings, but as the time passed by and I could not get any rickshaw to stop, I felt it more and more that the men passing by stared hard at me and scanned me like I was some character. It started to get on my nerves and I decided to walk towards my friend’s home. I was walking fast and felt like crying after experiencing these cruel stares from these men who were harassing me only with their eyes. All the way from that street corner to the house was the most hideous experience that I would never want to relive ever in my life.”
This was the story my friend told me after reaching my place exhausted and nearly in tears. This is the story of every woman who goes out and faces these kinds of harassing stares from the men around us.
These incidents arise only one question in my head that why are we still an ‘alien’ for the men? We are not the first generation of women or girls, we are not something unique, so why are men still unable to understand that we are normal human beings like they are?
Staring at someone is because you deem them to be an unusual thing is absolutely weird when girls and women exist everywhere. Staring at someone with lust is the most common and creepiest thing and is a form of harassment!
Of course, not all men stare and I have seen many who dislike such acts by other men and even help women when they get uncomfortable with the stares.
But still, we go through these stare harassment all the time. This is not the story of just one street, one city or one country, it happens everywhere, even in the developed ones, and it is entirely unacceptable. It crashes women’s confidence and makes them feel vulnerable. In fact, many men feel amused in an ill way by making women uncomfortable with the stares.
The only way to end this street stare harassment is by making men understand that it is not going to give them any satisfaction and this could happen to women about whom they care, possibly to whom they are related. Therefore, the best way is to end this way of harassment by not staring yourself!
Let’s have a healthy society for the next generation instead of one that is hateful and daunting.
Fasiha is a Contributor for UN Women Asia & the Pacific where she writes about gender-related issues, mainly gender equality, sexual harassment, and economic empowerment of women. You can find her on Facebook and Twitter, @FasihaFarrukh