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Archives for November 2018

“Did he know I was Asian?”

November 30, 2018 By Contributor

It was around 8:20am and I had just dropped off my child at his school. About a quarter of a mile down the school’s street, I waited to make a left turn onto a bigger, wider street that had two lanes per direction and a speed limit of 45 mph. It wasn’t a 4-way stop, so I was waiting until it was safe and clear to make that turn.

First, the lane closest to me cleared. I was thinking of turning left and then wait on the island before merging into the lane I needed to be in. But then cars, including a truck or bus or van started coming in from that lane so I continued to wait. Suddenly, I hear a long honk behind me, not short but a long, impatient one. I ignored it as it’s still not safe for me to make a left turn. Then the heard 4 or 5 more honks. This time I turn my head and look at the driver mouthing “what’s the problem” because he was really, really rude. He didn’t look at me. Finally it was clear to turn left and then I veered to the right turn lane (because I then had to turn right).

Then this white SUV got into my lane, driving very fast just inches from my car, honking. His dog, a golden brown hound was in the front, sticking his head out the window. I honked back as I rolled down my window ready to shout back in case he did too. He just drove on honking. I was shaken, felt violated and disrespected for doing the right thing– waiting to make a safe turn. I felt violated and disrespected when he honked not once but 4 or 5 times successively when I continued to wait until safe.

I felt discriminated. Did he know I was Asian and that’s why he didn’t care that he honked that way? He knew for sure when I turned my head and glared at him. He knew when he zoomed past me as if threatening to hit me. Unfortunately, I didn’t look at his plate number as I was just so shaken. I was having second thoughts about reporting. I didn’t think I’d find your site to report street harassment. initially I just wanted to talk to somebody–a friend, better if it’s an organization that deals with harassment. Then I found this site. I was saving second thoughts about reporting. I even forgave the other driver because he was probably mentally ill.

Is discrimination a form of mental illness? I’ve never experienced this in all 17 years I’ve been living in the U.S.– not this level of rudeness. I can’t help thinking what emboldened this driver to harass me the way he did. This is too much. I don’t feel safe. What if I had my children with me and they witnessed all this?

Location: Hatteras Street and Fall Brook Avenue, Woodland Hills, California

Need support? Call the toll-free National Street Harassment hotline: 855-897-5910

Share your street harassment story for the blog.
See the book 
50 Stories about Stopping Street Harassers for ideas.

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Filed Under: Stories, street harassment

16 Days – Day 6: Women Allies on a Bus

November 30, 2018 By HKearl

Each day across the 16 Days of Activism Against Gender-Based Violence, we will highlight a 2018 activism effort undertaken to stop street harassment or a personal story about stopping harassers!

Day 6: Women Allies on a Bus

One day in California, a man followed a woman for blocks. She boarded a bus to try to get away from him, but he got on too and continued harassing her. Another woman passenger stood up and asked her, “Do you feel safe?”

The harassed woman was so upset she can’t speak, so the other passenger guided her away and said, “We can sit together.”

The harasser tried to follow them, but other women passengers then stood up to block him. Soon “there were six or seven women creating this barrier,” said one of the women who stood up. “That man looked at us, yelled one last shitty thing, and got off at the next stop. Because he realized there was no way he could win against all of us.”

This woman who stood up wrote, “After I got off the bus, I started crying. I was sad because we have to deal with situations like this ALL the time, but I was crying happy tears because, for once, I felt like I wasn’t alone, and I felt how powerful we are when we stand together.”

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Filed Under: 16 days, Stories, street harassment Tagged With: bus, bystander, california, public transit

16 Days – Day 5: Indian Motorcycle Police Unit

November 29, 2018 By HKearl

Each day across the 16 Days of Activism Against Gender-Based Violence, we will highlight a 2018 activism effort undertaken to stop street harassment or a personal story about stopping harassers!

Day 5: Indian Motorcycle Police Unit

A 40-person, all-female motorcycle police unit in Delhi, India, has reduced the incidents of street harassment by 30 percent, according to the police in the city. The women have intervened in many street harassment cases during 24-hour patrols.

“We keep an eye on girls in distress. In several cases, members of the woman squad have nabbed stalkers. They rescue girls and also ensure they reach their destination safely,” said Vijayanta Arya, Deputy Commissioner of Police.

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Filed Under: 16 days, News stories, street harassment Tagged With: delhi, India, police unit

16 Days – Day 4: A Dad Stops a Harasser

November 28, 2018 By HKearl

Each day across the 16 Days of Activism Against Gender-Based Violence, we will highlight a 2018 activism effort undertaken to stop street harassment or a personal story about stopping harassers!

Day 4: A Dad Stops a Harasser

When a dad in California noticed a 29-year-old man start videotaping his 15-year-old daughter in a Target and crouch by another woman to take footage up her skirt, he kicked away the phone and then, when the man ran, tackled him in the parking lot. Then the dad called the police and got a photo of the man’s license plate number as he drove away. The man was later arrested for “invasion of privacy.”

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Filed Under: 16 days, male perspective, News stories, Stories, street harassment Tagged With: bystander, dad, harasser, teenager, upskirt

“I don’t know if things will ever change to stop men”

November 27, 2018 By HKearl

I walked to Sainsbury’s to get a key chain. On the way back a man around 30yrs old slowed down his walking pace to mine. I crossed the road to get away from him, but shortly after I crossed he crossed over to me. He then said, “Did you get it?”

I said, “What?” I was quite annoyed by this point of being followed on my way home.

He then started to say the first digits of his number “07…,” and I just said, “Mate, I’m just trying to get home,” and walked ahead of him at a faster pace.

He then carried on saying, “What’s your name?”

And I replied, “No. Sorry. But just no,” and carried on walking ahead.

When I looked back he was gone, which means he would have had to walk in the opposite direction. It made me feel annoyed because this happens a lot when I’m just trying to do ordinary day-to-day things. I get tired of responding to these people and having to deal with these situations. I also feel annoyed that some people think this is okay to do, I feel powerless and I don’t know if things will ever change to stop men doing this. I also experience men making kissing or inappropriate sounds at me as well as following me.

Optional: What’s one way you think we can make public places safer for everyone?

People on the street reacting/helping others when they are being harassed.

– Hannah

Location: Near a Sainsbury’s in Barnet, London, UK

Need support? Call the toll-free National Street Harassment hotline: 855-897-5910

Share your street harassment story for the blog.
See the book 
50 Stories about Stopping Street Harassers for ideas.

Share

Filed Under: Stories, street harassment

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