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“If we want to change then we can”

April 29, 2015 By Contributor

I was born and raised in a society that we can call a “Mannish Society.” In Afghanistan in families and even in every part of our society, it is the man who speaks and decides to do as he wishes. The last words are being said by men not women. Afghanistan society is a male dominant society.

In such environment it is really really hard for women and girls to live normally. Among the numerous problems that females are confronting in Afghanistan, street harassment is more usual and steady steady and somehow it is being changed to a culture.

Why am I saying that street harassment is changing to a culture here in Afghanistan?

Because, majority of Afghans are illiterate and they believe and accept whatever the Mullas (some) say to them in Mosques. Mullahs allow men to engage in street harassment in some cases. Especially when a female walks in the streets with so-called inappropriate clothes, then according to their ideology men are allowed to say bad words to them and even physically harass or rape them. Why is doing this not a bad act? People and Mullahs would say because these girls or women are not practicing Islam and not wearing Hijab. This is the fact of our society!

When I was studying English, my classmate Maryam was very intelligent and beautiful. Because she was raised in Iran her clothes and style was a little different form other Afghan girls. I witnessed that many boys harassed her with bad words daily and some of them were my friends. All she could do was to remain silent because she did not want to make this issue bigger. But day by day this problem got serious and she lost her patience. She started arguing with those boys that were harassing her but she was alone, she failed. She left the class forever.

It hurt me a lot to see her in such condition. I tried many times to talk with my friends and stop them from harassing her but since I was younger than those boys, no one cared. I talked with our teacher to help me stop these acts, but he was not eager to help me as well.

After that incident whenever I see people harassing girls or women in streets and university I go to them and talk reasonably with them to stop them and explain to them that their act is wrong. I ask what if it happens to their sister or mother, what then?

Now it is the time for everyone to start vanishing this bad and shameful culture. Yes, if we want to change then we can. We can start it right now! As Mahatma Gandhi said, “Be the change that you want to see in the world.” By using social media, TV and radio spots, adding the topic of not harassing females to school books and explaining the negative impacts of street harassment, we can bring changes.

– Shafi Bajauri

Location: Kabul, Afghanistan

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SSH will not publish any comment that is offensive or hateful and does not add to a thoughtful discussion of street harassment. Racism, homophobia, transphobia, disabalism, classism, and sexism will not be tolerated. Disclaimer: SSH may use any stories submitted to the blog in future scholarly publications on street harassment.
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