I was at a college bar and I witnessed a man touching a woman’s butt while she was moving away from him and closer to her friends. By what I saw there was a chance that he was harassing her and she was moving toward her friends for safety. I asked her if she knew him, and she said he’s her boyfriend. Apparently she was not being harassed and was moving away from him because she wanted to talk to her friends.
This is what many bystanders are afraid of: intervening when there’s no harassment going on. But like this scenario, it really wasn’t that bad. She just told me that he was her boyfriend, and that was the end of it. I intervened because I remember somewhere else I witnessed a man grinding on a woman who didn’t know him (that time it turned out to be true), and I took advantage of the crowded place by blocking his access to her as she walked away. I know that it’s common in crowded places. It’s better to intervene and be told by her that she’s not being harassed than to watch the harassment and allow it to happen.
– Concealed Weapon
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Whitney says
Yes!! Good job. (And fyi, this works for women who appear really drunk leaving bars with men who don’t appear to know them.)
Concealed Weapon says
Whitney, I once intervened in that scenario too. I saw a drunk woman leave a bar and a man followed her out. Some other witnesses who most likely knew her said that she didn’t know him. Another man and I intervened by attempting to bring her back to the bar. The police came by at that time and it looked like we were the ones trying to kidnap her, so they stopped us and searched us for weapons. I’m still glad I intervened, because what happened was better than her being kidnapped, raped, and murdered.