Posted on Reddit:

“Today, my mother and I went to the beach. I’m a 20-some woman and she’s a fairly hot lady herself, no lie. Obviously this means we were around other girls in bikinis, par for the course. I was lying face down on a blanket and my mother was lying face up, just enjoying the weather.

We heard this whirring noise above us and I looked up and saw a remote-controlled plane–one of the square ones that can move really articulately in all directions. No big deal. I turned back down and napped more.

Then I noticed: a. It was getting really close to women. Like, straight up in their asses close, flying really low, staying there for probably three minutes at a time, and b. it had a camera on it.

It then decided to target my mother and I and hovered over us. I got mad and decided that, fuck this, I was going to throw a water bottle at it and take it down (not the best choice, sure, yeah, I know) and it immediately backed up when I advanced on it. So I knew the operator was nearby. Sure enough, there were two men up on the dunes nearby holding the remote, so I put on all my clothes first and then ran up to them. The person holding the remote was probably sixteen; the other was what I can only assume was his father. He was around forty-some. He was also giving the younger kid directions.

So I walked up to the older man and said “That is seriously creepy.”

“What?”

“You flying around your creep drone is really fucking creepy.”

“It isn’t going to hurt you.” He sort of laughed at me now, and I saw red here.

“I’m not worried about my PERSONAL SAFETY, though I am now worried a bit for YOURS. Your drone is creepy and violating. You need to take it out of the air, or I will.”

“Fine, it won’t go near you”

“No, I need it out of the sky. Now. You are violating every woman on this beach. Get it out of the sky.”

He actually got the kid to call it back and packed it up. Even so, I left. I am so mad that I was violated in that way–and the potentials for anyone else being violated that way.”

I was walking to class one morning and an attractive young woman walked past myself and another man. Immediately, he started to shout suggestive lines at her (she ignored him and kept walking) and then he began to shout very offensive things toward her and I had heard enough of it! I turned to him and asked, “What in the world is wrong with you?! That could be my sister!”

He saw I was angry and apologized. I ran and caught up to the young lady and told her that I was sorry she went through that on behalf of my gender. She said, “Its okay” as if it was something she endures everyday. I said, “No it’s not okay” I wanted to keep chatting with her, but I had to get to class. I hope wherever she is she doesn’t have to get used to that kinda thing.

What can we do create more street respect?

I think you have to reach out to men more. The only people that can make the creeps stop is the good men out there. The only problem is a good man doesn’t himself know for certain what is and is not appropriate. He feels it in his gut, but no one ever says anything so rarely do they intervene and are more likely to keep quite when those males around them act creepy.

Honestly, I would suggest holding workshops on appropriate ways of addressing women (Something never taught in schools).

– Richard S.

Location: Outside of the Brooklyn College Campus, NY

I was walking by a local park at 9.30 on a Sunday morning with my hood up (as it was drizzling), when a man crossed the road and began walking quickly behind me. I got the impression he was following me, so I veered to the right to pause and look at my phone, while noticing out of my periphery him turning to see what I looked like as he walked by. I remained where I was until he walked on. I then carried on walking but slowed my pace and shortly after, about ten metres ahead of me, he turned around, walked towards me and said, “Hey, I’ll lick your pussy every night, every night,” to which I instinctively responded “Get away!” and he carried on walking past.

This could have gone very differently I realised afterwards. He was about 15 years my senior and rather built, but I am tall for a girl, but what this indicates is the context is irrelevant, the objective blatant. His pursuit was already in motion before even catching a glimpse of me, aside from my outline. He knew my gender, that was all. There have been countless occasions in which I have been cat-called on the street (not as confrontational as this instance, but it is the same).

Do you have any suggestions for dealing with harassers and/or ending street harassment in general?

Until the persistently objectifying media stops dehumanizing women, until men stop dehumanising women, the only thing you can do is walk away, speak up, raise awareness and challenge the naturalisation of harassment. Most importantly, tell men this is never acceptable.

– MW

Location: Albert Park in Middlesbrough, UK

All I wanted to do was get pizza, not deal with a random guy who wouldn’t leave me alone!

I went to The Italian Store after work to get some slices of pizza for dinner. Usually this is something I do with little fanfare. But this loud, obnoxious guy was there who wouldn’t leave me alone.

I was very tired during this interaction. (I’d just woken up from my bus ride minutes before arriving at the store and was somewhat somnolent.) These things were on my mind:

*My shoes hurt my feet and I can’t wait to take them off
*My upcoming doctor’s appointment
*I’m hungry and I wonder what slices I’ll get

None of my thoughts were, “Gee, I hope some random man bugs me!”

As I look at the slices on display, this guy, another customer, says, “Whaddup, ma?” at me.

“Don’t call me ‘ma’,” I said. This guy reacts overdramatically, throwing his arms in the air and backing up in this “Gee, what’s wrong with you?” manner.

“Long day?” he asks.

I give a curt “Mm-hmm,” not looking at him.

“Well, it’s over,” he said. Then he makes a comment about me needing to enjoy my day. Since when was he designated the keeper of my moods?

“Do you know what you want?” he asks, referencing the pizza.

I said, “Mm-hmm” again, once again not looking at him, and he goes on about, “I don’t need to talk to you, because you know what you want!”

This guy would not stop attempting to chat me up and wouldn’t leave me alone, and made comments about how I was having a “bad day” which he thought I should’ve gotten over.

“Well, did you have a nice Mother’s Day?” he asked. “Are you a mother?”

“Does it look like I’m a mother?!” I said, clearly irritated. (Looking back, I realize that my comment was offensive, since there’s no one way to “look like a mother.” My being annoyed with this guy was no excuse to make comments like that.)

“You’re clearly not from around here,” he said.

“Got that right!” I said. People working behind the counter started looking over my way with this air that read, “Oh, drama!”

“Well, I’m from the South,” this guy says, being overdramatic with his gestures again. “I’m friendly. I like to talk to people.”

I assumed that this guy was talking to me in a tone that was more familiar than I was comfortable with coming from a stranger because we’re both black, and I asked, “If I were a white woman, would you talk to me like this?” That caught him off guard.

“Would you approach a white woman and say, ‘Whaddup, ma’?” I asked.

“You need to loosen up, baby,” he said. Then, under his breath, “Would I talk to a white woman that way [scoffs].”

“Yeah, you approached me in a way that is too friendly and familiar with me,” I said. “I was standing here minding my business and I want to be left alone. And don’t call me ‘baby’ either.”

He repeated that I needed to “loosen up,” and claimed that he’d leave me alone, but he once again tried to engage me when I made my order and he claimed that I “stole” one of the slices he wanted. He was invisible to me at that point. I was never so glad for him to get his order and leave.

This guy was acting like he was in a romcom. He acted like the goofy guy who keeps bugging the “cold” woman with an attitude until she loosened up and fell for him. Well, my life is not a romcom, and I was not going to “loosen up” for some random guy who, when I said I wanted to be left alone, continued to bug me and put me down because I wasn’t going to cater to his whims.

This guy appeared to be wearing a delivery service uniform, but I didn’t get the name of the company he worked for. If this is his “friendly” approach with women, then he needs to reconsider it, especially when he’s on the clock.

Do you have any suggestions for dealing with harassers and/or ending street harassment in general?

For this situation: Men, don’t approach women with corny slang and lame lines. Say “hello.” If the woman appears interested, you can talk to her, but if she appears disinterested, LEAVE HER ALONE. Don’t push it! Women have lives outside of being hit on and pestered by random men!

– Anonymous

Location: The Italian Store, 3123 Lee Highway, Arlington, VA