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Plumbing company street harassers

February 8, 2012 By Contributor

I was harassed by this man (nearest to the camera) this morning. He works for a plumbing company in Manhattan. The employee had commented on my body as I was on my way to a meeting. Do I really need to hear that my legs look good?

I called the company to complain and the owner was very nice and receptive, apologized and promised to “talk to the person in a very serious way.”

It helped to take a picture because even though he was looking away on purpose, I was able to describe him to the owner.

I know that it doesn’t matter and they shouldn’t harass anyone no matter what, but I was dressed in a sober manner. It’s so intrusive and disgusting, and I told the man that this really impacts a woman’s quality of life, and this is not 1935…let’s evolve!

– Toby

Location: New York City, USA

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Be a fake friend to stop street harassers (capes optional)

February 7, 2012 By Contributor

Editors Note: This is cross-posted with permission from the blog Lauren Bravo is My Real Name. Her bystander intervention technique was simple but effective and it started off by checking in to see if the person wanted help so it was not dis-empowering. Her tactic is one that any one of us can do. So keep that in mind when you witness harassment and you’re not sure what to do.  Pull the fake friend card and step on in!

I did a good deed the other week. On the scale between replacing the loo roll when you’ve finished it and pulling a child out of the way of a speeding bus shouting “Little Jimmy, nooooo!” then I’ll concede it’s closer to the Andrex end, but still, I felt proud.

My deed was this: I saw a woman, on a busy Euston Road at 6pm, being hounded by a man. He wasn’t being outwardly aggressive, but he was sliming round her like a slug in an overcoat, asking questions and ignoring all clear signals (headphones in, one-word answers, refusal to make eye contact) that she wasn’t interested.

I caught the girl’s eye and mouthed, “Are you ok?” to which she shook her head. So then I had a decision to make, quickly. To barge in like the Green Cross Code Man and say, “STOP, letch! She doesn’t want to talk to you. RETREAT,” before blasting him with a sonic ray gun, or the alternative; pretend to be her mate.  “There you are!” I cried, launching myself on her (for if I’m going to do a good deed I may as well get a hug out of it). “Hi!” she faked, as I dragged her away. Then we stood together on the pavement miming friendly chat like a couple of am-dram actors, while Slug Man stared, lingered, and eventually slithered off back to his cabbage patch.

She was pretty grateful, or at least acted like she was. “I always attract the weirdos too,” I told her, in what I thought at the time was a reassuring manner. Then I disappeared off into the night, swishing my imaginary cape and feeling proud.

Why don’t more people do this? Seriously? There must have been 20 people within view and earshot standing nearby, yet nobody else paid the slightest attention. I assume for the same reasons more strangers don’t tell you when you have food on your face – because we are all really hermit crabs, and unprecedented human contact is more often than not a big ol’ faff.

There’s the worry that you’re going to get ‘involved in something’, of course, and I can appreciate that. But nobody’s saying you have to leap in with your handbag swinging. Even a stern glance or a calm, disapproving presence could help. A well-timed ‘tut’ might still go some way to helping these lowlifes learn that harassing us for the simple crime of possessing ovaries is Not Ok.

This isn’t necessarily about sisterhood, either. I stopped and rescued her because I’ve been in her place enough times to know it’s awful, and because it makes my blood boil that street harassment is still so commonplace when it ought to have gone the way of the permed mullet. But a bloke could likewise have stopped and rescued her because he’s a decent person, and it makes HIS blood boil that street harassment is still so commonplace it ought to have gone the way of the permed mullet.

So let’s make this a new thing – street harassment crusaders! Operation Creep-Be-Gone! Bolshy builders, drunk leerers at bus stops, creepy guys who hang around asking you your name at train stations – all beware! For before you know it, a Fake Friend might leap out of the shadows and stop you in your tracks. Who’s with me?

(Capes optional)

– Lauren Bravo, by day, Senior Writer for Channel 4 Food and columnist for the Worthing Herald series. By night, London-lover, glutton and grump.

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Filed Under: Stories, street harassment Tagged With: bystander, fake friend, Lauren Bravo, street harassment

Interview: Photographing street harassers

February 6, 2012 By Contributor

Image from the "City of Brotherly Love" exhibit

In her photo series “City of Brotherly Love,” photographer Hannah Price responds to experiences with street harassment in Philadelphia. She described the images as “a response to my subjects looking at me, and myself as an artist looking back.”

Her series was displayed in a recent exhibit at the Philadelphia Museum of Art. Upon visiting the exhibit with street harassment activist Holly Kearl, I was instantly moved and left with questions about who this photographer is and what made her “click.” I had the pleasure of meeting with the talented Hannah Price soon after. Here’s what she had to say:

Nuala Cabral (NC): What inspired you to create a photo exhibit that brings attention to street harassment?

Hannah Price (HP): The only thing that allowed me to create this type of work, are the men who harass me on the street everyday. It was a basic response with my camera to turn the attention away from me.  Like I said before being harassed by men is a part of my everyday life and this project is a documentation of my life as a black woman in Philadelphia with a background from suburbia Colorado.

Hannah Price

NC: What are your hopes and expectations for this project?

HP: My only hope is to help people understand how uncomfortable overtly expressing oneself sexually to another person can be.  There are other ways of communicating an interest with another person.

NC: How did men react when you took their picture?

HP: Most of the men were surprised I responded because the typical response is avoidance.  After confronting and taking their photograph they respected my disinterest.

NC: How have people responded to your photo exhibit?

HP: Most responses to my project have been quite positive.  No one has yet expressed any backlash.  Most people are interested in the process and experience of photographing men in a unpleasant, semi-dangerous situation.

NC: What did you learn in the process of creating and displaying this project?

HP: I have learned that the only way we can stop sexual harassment is by getting rid of the certain sexual media that children have access to at such a young age.

NC: What are your thoughts about the movement to end street harassment?

HP: I think this movement is inevitably necessary, especially if society still respects their own human decency.

Nuala Cabral is an award-winning filmmaker, educator and activist in the Philadelphia-area.

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Filed Under: Activist Interviews, street harassment Tagged With: art exhibit, art museum, Hannah Price, Nuala Cabral, philadelphia, street harassment

Driving instructor harasser

February 5, 2012 By Contributor

I was taking driving lessons and the instructor used to ask me to take the car towards outskirts of the city, which was quite secluded and didn’t have many people.

Once on that way, he remarked I was a quick learner and that I drove well. The next thing I knew, he put his arm around my neck and tried to touch my boobs. When I pushed myself away, he took my face in his hands and kissed me on my cheek. I froze. I didn’t know how to react and I wanted to punch him, but I couldn’t as I didn’t know how to tackle the situation after that or how to go back home. I was scared that he might rape me, there was no one around. After he kissed me, he kept asking me not to tell anyone. I just kept my mouth shut. I got back safely and got out of the car and shut it as hard as possible.

That bastard called me back the next day, but i told him I was done with the classes and I wasn’t going to attend them. He never called me back after that…I felt yucky that day. I went back home and washed my left cheek hundred times… I can still feel that facial hair all over my face.. yuck… I felt so violated…

– Anonymous

Location: Gurgaon, India

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Why leering guys can be scary

February 4, 2012 By Contributor

Pretty weird:

I was sitting in the tram and that guy stared and smiled at me. The whole time he was looking at me. I was pissed (because one day another guy stared at me in the tram and followed me through the city and I had to trick him like an agent or something to get him off). I left the tram and he was still behind me. OMG!

Then I had to walk a little while between 2 houses, dark with no people around and he was still behind me. Then I reached some kind of market place with a lot of people and dived into the crowed. He gave up and turned around.

A couple of days later I was reading the news online and there was a picture of him. Taken from the video camera in a tram in the night. Because he stared at a women, followed her, attacked her and tried to rape her. She could escape.

I didn’t go to the police. What should I tell? He stared at me?

– NN

Location: Germany

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