• About Us
    • What Is Street Harassment?
    • Why Stopping Street Harassment Matters
    • Meet the Team
      • Board of Directors
      • Past Board Members
    • In The Media
  • Our Work
    • National Street Harassment Hotline
    • International Anti-Street Harassment Week
    • Blog Correspondents
      • Past SSH Correspondents
    • Safe Public Spaces Mentoring Program
    • Publications
    • National Studies
    • Campaigns against Companies
    • Washington, D.C. Activism
  • Our Books
  • Donate
  • Store

Stop Street Harassment

Making Public Spaces Safe and Welcoming

  • Facebook
  • Instagram
  • Pinterest
  • Tumblr
  • Twitter
  • YouTube
  • Home
  • Blog
    • Harassment Stories
    • Blog Correspondents
    • Street Respect Stories
  • Help & Advice
    • National Street Harassment Hotline
    • Dealing With Harassers
      • Assertive Responses
      • Reporting Harassers
      • Bystander Responses
      • Creative Responses
    • What to Do Before or After Harassment
    • Street Harassment and the Law
  • Resources
    • Definitions
    • Statistics
    • Articles & Books
    • Anti-Harassment Groups & Campaigns
    • Male Allies
      • Educating Boys & Men
      • How to Talk to Women
      • Bystander Tips
    • Video Clips
    • Images & Flyers
  • Take Community Action
  • Contact

Street harassment syndrome: why men need to step up before it’s too late

January 19, 2011 By Contributor

Street harassment is thought by some people to be nothing more than harmless banter between the sexes.  Others see street harassment as the front lines in a battle between the genders.  I view street harassment as a more far reaching issue.  I believe street harassment can be described as a cultural disease that attacks the basic civility of society.

On the surface, street harassment shows itself in the form of inappropriate and threatening behavior by men towards women on the street or in other public areas. This learned behavior is infectious with certain urban areas such as New York City and Washington DC experiencing street harassment in epidemic proportions.

Beneath the surface, this disease, which I call Street Harassment Syndrome (SHS), is ripping the civil fabric of society. While SHS may have the most immediate effect on the young girls and women who are harassed, its damage doesn’t stop there.  SHS causes a degenerative cycle in the manner in which people treat each other.  Both men and women become accustomed and conditioned to treat each other with rudeness and indifference as opposed to politeness and compassion.

The less obvious, but wide spread symptoms of SHS can be seen in large cities where street harassment is the norm.  Some of these symptoms are (in no particular order):

  • The majority of women are afraid of men they encounter on the street.
  • Some men exhibit highly aggressive behavior towards women on the street.
  • The majority of women purposely ignore men they see on the street.
  • The majority of men become accustomed to being ignored by women on the street.
  • Some men view the majority of women as “bitches”.
  • Some women view the majority of men as “assholes”.
  • Some women change their routines and style of dress to avoid the attention of men on the street.
  • Both men and women become accustomed to “not getting involved”.
  • Some women develop angry reactionary responses to males.
  • Some men develop angry reactionary responses to females.
  • Men and women engage in a destructive cycle of finger pointing and blame.
  • Some women develop generally lower feelings of well-being.
  • Some men become passive and intimidated of more verbally aggressive men.
  • The majority of women learn to be silent and passive to verbal abuse.
  • The majority of men see “calling out” to women to be acceptable behavior.
  • Some men learn that outwardly aggressive behavior is an effective method to dominate both women and men.

The above examples are just some of the negative side effects of SHS.  The majority of these symptoms can be summarized as lowered feelings of safety, well-being, and civil behavior in the general population.

An incident of harassment is the wound that allows the entry of SHS into the culture.  Just like a contagious infection, the more incidents that occur, the faster the disease is able to spread throughout the culture.  What stops the inflection is a strong response from all members of society that both refutes and repels the behavior as it occurs.  Outspoken social disapproval from both men and women is needed in order to contain the spread of Street Harassment Syndrome and to ultimately remove it from society.

– Erik Kondo

Erik is the founder of the self defense nonprofit Not-Me!

This post is part of the weekly blog series by male allies. We need men involved in the work to end the social acceptability of street harassment and to stop the practice, period. If you’d like to contribute to this weekly series, please contact me.

Share

Filed Under: male perspective Tagged With: erik kondo, not-me, self defense, street harassment, street harassment disease

“I want to add my voice to those women who have experienced street harassment”

January 18, 2011 By Contributor

I have been yelled at and honked at multiple times from men driving past in cars. I have never had a very serious or scary experience, but it happens often enough to make me really annoyed and very, very angry. What troubles me most is deciding on an appropriate way to react to this very rude and obnoxious behaviour.

There has recently been some discussion on this subject in the media in New Zealand and I want to add my voice to those women who have experienced street harassment.

– Anonymous

Location: Auckland, New Zealand

Share your street harassment story today and help raise awareness about the problem. Find suggestions for what YOU can do about this human rights issue.

Share

Filed Under: Stories, street harassment Tagged With: Ackland, New Zealand, sexual harassment, street harassment

An early inspiration about street harassment

January 12, 2011 By Contributor

Several years ago I worked at a manufacturing plant for a large company.  One of the goal areas for the year was to raise awareness of racial diversity and to improve the workplace for people of color.  Although I was raised with a strong sense of the Golden Rule, “Do unto others as you would have them do unto you,” and I thought this was a great way to live one’s life, I was startled to learn a new paradigm, “Do unto others as they would have you do unto them”.

I draw a lot of inspiration from this lesson when I think about males interacting with females.  As a male, I get it that men (at least a lot of men) may take it as a compliment and like it if a woman on the street said something to them like, “Hey baby, looking good today”.  But men, the point is that it isn’t about us.  It is about the woman/women we are in public with and what she/they want(s).

What do women want from men?  Of course I can’t speak for all situations and all women (or men).  But from my personal experiences and those that I read about, there are some near universal truths:

  1. Women don’t want personalized, focused interaction with men they don’t know in most daily public settings. Unfortunately men bring with them the collective baggage of all the creepy men past and present who have ever been rude, offensive or worse. So regardless of our intentions, we must realize that the female we are going to potentially interact with don’t know if we are one of the good guys or not.
  2. That said, men need to be smart enough to match the interaction with the situation.  That is, certain interactions with women we don’t know depending on the situation are ok for the street, in line at a store, when at a sporting event, a party, etc.
  3. Men need to make sure to help mentor other men and younger males.  Face it, men are pretty clueless about interactions with women and need help!  We don’t have to be crusaders (or maybe we do) but persistent, quiet example can/will go a long way to making a difference.
  4. Although I personally find opportunities are rare, men need to help women when they see they are being harassed.  Simple things like diverting the attention of the harasser (ask them a question) to actually confronting the harasser, will stop the situation.

It is sad to realize on the one hand, the incredible innovations of the past decade and contrast that with some of the incredibly hard incidents of harassment we read about on this blog.  Men, let’s make a difference today.

– Alan Kearl

This is the first post in a new weekly series written by male allies who have volunteered to share their experiences with and view points on street harassment. We need men involved in the work to end the social acceptability of street harassment and to stop the practice, period, and the voices of male allies contribute to these goals. If you’d like to contribute to this weekly series, please contact me.

Share

Filed Under: male perspective Tagged With: male allies blog series, street harassment

Silent harasser in a Switzerland hostel

January 11, 2011 By Contributor

This actually happened in a hostel rather than on the street. I was siting in the common area and was the only one there. I had the TV on but wasn’t facing it as I was using my laptop at the time. A man then came in and sat opposite me on one of the other couches. At first I thought nothing of it until I realized he wasn’t facing the TV at all – his eyes, and his whole body was directed towards me.

At this stage I thought he could just be trying to be social and get my attention in a friendly way but as I had been travelling on my own for the past 9 weeks, I was growing wary of male attention whether genuine or not. I put on my headphones so he would get the idea I wanted to be left alone.

That seemed to work and I’m not sure where his eyes were directed then as I wasn’t interested. His friend then came in and they had a conversation – it was clear by this guys loud voice and stupid “listen to me impress this girl” answers that this was no normal conversation but both guys got up and left to start cooking dinner.

Thinking that would be the last of it I pulled the headphones out of my ears and continued with my email. Less than 5 minutes later however, he was back. There were three large couches and one sofa in the common area. As I was alone I’d put my laptop bag and hand bag on the seat next to me thinking no one would need the seats. The guy then comes up to me, takes both bags one by one and throws them on the floor (yes – ‘throws’ and I thought he was trying to impress me) and sat right beside me.

I was too suprised by what had just happened to turn and yell at him, which now I think back was probably a good thing as my non-reaction was probably not what he ‘d been hoping for. I ended up picking the bags up and moving to the other side of the room. I think at this stage he’d become annoyed with me more than anything. When his friend came back and asked if he wanted to eat downstairs he said, head and eyes fully on me and nowhere near his friend, “No, I think I’ll just stay here”.

His friend, a bit confused, shrugged his shoulders and left without him. I then moved to another room and sat with my back to everyone else – a bit anti social but I had a fantastic view out the window and a heater to lean against. As expected, the man followed me in and sat a few tables behind. I gave up at this point – as long as I couldn’t see him staring he was welcome – the back of my head is not particularly exciting!! For that matter neither is the rest of me – I was still dressed in my winter hiking gear!

The problem with this encounter is that who was I suppossed to report this too? I don’t think the hostel staff would have done much but shrug it off, or jokily tell the man to leave me alone. It’s not something enough people take seriously and had me thinking also – if I was the hostel stff what would I or could I have done? He didn’t say anything innapropriate or do anything that could be considered ‘harrassment’ but he still succeded in making me feel extremely uncomfortable!

– Anonymous

Location: Switzerland

Share your street harassment story today and help raise awareness about the problem. Find suggestions for what YOU can do about this human rights issue.

Share

Filed Under: Stories, street harassment Tagged With: hostel, hostile, street harassment, switzerland

Harassers with x-ray vision

January 6, 2011 By Contributor

This happened last night while driving :

I had my window cracked open because i was smoking in my car and we were stopped at a red light. Two mouth breathers in a blue Honda Civic started yelling: “I LOVE YOUR TITS!”

Because they were so noticeable in my three layers of winter clothing and my scarf whilst I am behind the wheel of my car… Right. You like that I have tits and you could hypothetically look at them, because that’s why they’re there – AMIRITE??!

Idiots.

I cranked up the metal, flipped them off and drove away.

– Anonymous

Location: Edmonton, Alberta

Share your street harassment story today and help raise awareness about the problem. Find suggestions for what YOU can do about this human rights issue.

Share

Filed Under: Stories, street harassment Tagged With: i love your tits, sexual harassment, street harassment

« Previous Page
Next Page »

Share Your Story

Share your street harassment story for the blog. Donate Now

From the Blog

  • #MeToo 2024 Study Released Today
  • Join International Anti-Street Harassment Week 2022
  • Giving Tuesday – Fund the Hotline
  • Thank You – International Anti-Street Harassment Week 2021
  • Share Your Story – Safecity and Catcalls Collaboration

Buy the Book

  • Contact
  • Events
  • Join Us
  • Donate
  • Facebook
  • Instagram
  • Pinterest
  • Tumblr
  • Twitter
  • YouTube

Copyright © 2026 Stop Street Harassment · Website Design by Sarah Marie Lacy