It did not just happen once. Every time I’m walking alone in the area, even with oversized shirt and legging, I hear them talk in the local dialect. I am of Chinese descent and don’t really look like locals appearance-wise, so they thought I wouldn’t understand them. Whistles and questions like, “Where are you going, beautiful?” I would mostly ignore. But this afternoon at the airport when I heard a guy (40ish yo) said loudly to his friends, “Damnnn, this one looks delicious,” as I was passing by, I couldn’t help but stop and asked if he was talking to me or talking about me. All of them (6-7 people) just turned away and avoided eye contact, he looked quite shocked to be confronted. So I walked away, shaking, but victorious.

Whenever you are in a public space with a lot of people and lights, don’t hesitate. Confront them. Most of them would rather run and hide than be confronted. Believe me most of them would not even have the balls to look you in the eyes and apologize. I actually wanted to scream out the question one more time if they acted stupid, but they acted ashamed, so I just went off. What I couldn’t believe is when I told my friend of the incidence, he said isn’t that normal, the catcalling?

It looks like we need a new definition of normal.

Optional: What’s one way you think we can make public places safer for everyone?

I don’t agree with women-only passageway or space or whatever. It’s not us who needs to be confined, it’s the guys who need some good lessons in respect. Put up a fine. Anyone with video proof can sue someone who catcalls. Or anyone who witnessed a street harassment and can provide visual and audio proof of it should get a reward.

– FW

Location: Bali Ngurah Rai International Airport, Indonesia

Need support? Call the toll-free National Street Harassment hotline: 855-897-5910

Share your street harassment story for the blog.
See the book 50 Stories about Stopping Street Harassers for ideas.

My boyfriend and I were on a date to see a movie. We had time to kill so we went to check out a Barnes and Nobles bookstore. We were together for most of the time walking the aisles. We stopped into the store’s Starbucks, sat at a table, and everything seemed perfectly normal. He wasn’t finished with his coffee yet so I decided to go back to looking at books and I told him to catch up when he was done.

I went to the language section in the far back left corner of the store near the bathrooms. I looked over and there were some women in the far aisles. I was so into the books that I hadn’t noticed a guy come up beside me until he spoke. “Can I ask you a question?” He was tall with curly hair and glasses and his voice had some kind of accent I didn’t recognize. “Sure, what’s up?”

“Where can I take you to f**k the shit out of you?”

My mind just completely stopped working. “What?”

“You heard me.”

“Um, no.”

“Why not?” He seemed to actually be aggravated by my answer.

“Because no.”

“That’s not a reason, why not?”

“I have a boyfriend.”

“I don’t see him, where is he? I insist.”

“No.”

My stomach dropped when I turned my back on him and no one was in the aisle with me. We were right next to the bathrooms, in the far back of the store. It would have been nothing for him to pick me up. But he let me go.

I told the manager on duty and pointed him out. The manager didn’t do anything, but he kept an eye on him. I guess he really couldn’t take my word against his. I coaxed my boyfriend to leave with me but only told him what happened once we were at the theater. I didn’t need him to go to jail over one jerk with no manners.

It was crazy, I’ve never experienced that kind of aggression before. I attract quiet, sweet, soft-spoken guys. I had no idea how to react to him, he broke my brain. I don’t think I’ve ever thought about what I would or should do in that situation. This kind of thing always felt like something that happened far away, to other people.

Optional: What’s one way you think we can make public places safer for everyone?

It’s like the schools that send girls home for unacceptable clothing. It’s not the place, the clothes, or the outside variables. Boys need to be taught to respect women.

– R.B.

Location: Tyler, TX

Need support? Call the toll-free National Street Harassment hotline: 855-897-5910

Share your street harassment story for the blog.
See the book 50 Stories about Stopping Street Harassers for ideas.

I was unloading groceries in my mom’s car’s trunk as she ran into the store to get something she forgot. I hard a car running and when I turned around, I saw a man with short brown hair and a face broken out in acne staring at me from his silver car. My initial impression was that he was waiting for me to move my car, but that didn’t make sense. My mom parked far away from the building where there aren’t other car because she doesn’t want her car to be hit by car doors or carts. Then I thought maybe he knew me. Or maybe he saw my underwear as I leaned over to grab groceries and put them in the car?

He never rolled the window down or said anything. He just stared and looked away when he saw me looking at him. Cars were going around him. I thought maybe he was drunk because he seemed really nervous and odd. I got a weird weird feeling. So I sped up putting things away, and went to put the cart very close to the building instead of in the cart rack nearby. I kept watching him behind my back. He parked his car a space from my mom’s and waited for me to get back to my car. A chill went down my spine. I didn’t know what he was going to do. I could still see him watching me. So I went toward the store like I was going inside. When he saw me going toward the store, he pulled out and sped off.

Optional: Do you have any suggestions for dealing with harassers and/or ending street harassment in general?

Get to where there are people and always have a plan when you are alone. Be observant of your surroundings.

– Emily

Location: Ballwin, Mo

Need support? Call the toll-free National Street Harassment hotline: 855-897-5910

Share your street harassment story for the blog.
See the book 50 Stories about Stopping Street Harassers for ideas.