Saturday night at 1:30 a.m., I was walking to my apartment from the train. It’s about a 10 minute walk, so I was already very alert and armed with pepper spray just in case. I experienced 4 (4!!!) different incidents of harassment on my way home. I think what upset me the most about it was that I was alone and already nervous about my walk home, but to add disgusting sexual catcalls in the mix just enraged me. How dare these strangers make me feel so afraid and nervous walking through my own neighborhood in my own city. I want it to stop. I want to feel safe enough to take the train home instead of paying for a cab that I can’t afford.

– Ellen

Location: New York City – Harlem

I was sitting on the bus and this scary man who had clearly been chasing the bus for a few blocks runs on to the bus goes in for the kill aka me and tells me ” I’m the most perfect thing he’s seen” then proceeds to kiss my hand and run off screaming “GOD DAMN F***ING BEAUTIFUL!”

Do you have any suggestions for dealing with harassers and/or ending street harassment in general?

Learn to make your permanent bitch face on point and wear it proud and everywhere.

– TM

Location: The bus in MKE

I have been harassed on the street many times, but this is my most recent story:

Last night, I was waiting outside a pub for some of my friends, and I was harassed twice within ten minutes.

Guy #1 came up to me as I was waiting for my friends, and started commenting on how I looked “gorgeous”. He got right into my personal space, and was easily 50 or older (I’m 23 – not that that matters!) I told him that I was waiting for friends, and wanted to be left alone. He eventually walked away (slowly) but kept turning back, and saying things like “But you look so gorgeous! I know I don’t look as good as you…” I stayed where I was, and made a point of looking straight ahead, and checking my phone to show that I was not going to engage further.

Guy #2 came out of the bar I was waiting outside of with his buddy (both were in their forties). I heard him say “LET’S ASK THIS BEAUTIFUL LADY”, and I braced myself, as I knew what was coming next. He came up and asked if I had a lighter. I told him no, as I don’t smoke. He replied with “I can see that, if you did, you wouldn’t be nearly as hot.” I told him (coldly), “I’ll keep that in mind.” He went back to his friend, and although I couldn’t hear them, it was clear that they were talking about me.

My friends arrived, and we went into the pub. And two tables away from us was Guy #1! For the first five minutes, he just stared at me, smiling. I was with a group of six people, so I felt fairly safe, but still uncomfortable. Why do they think leering at another person is okay?

Neither of these are horrifying situations, but I didn’t want to talk to either of these people, and as a result, came across as rude. I don’t owe them my time or attention, and I know this, but I hate that I have to be this way just to feel safe in my own city!

– Becca

Location: Calgary, Canada

 

I’ve been bothered countless times throughout my life, but one incident really sticks out to me at the moment. I was only eleven years old. My cousin lived with us for a while, and I would walk her about a half mile to her school bus stop. Other kids and sometimes parents would wait there for the bus to come.

For a while it was just us kids and one parent. He had a young daughter. I didn’t notice him at first, then I realized he was watching me. He’d stand close to me, talk to me about icky things even when I ignored him, and leer. He was incredibly inappropriate. I never told my parents out of shame and eventually he stopped coming.

– MH

Location: Bus stop

It was Easter Sunday and I was hopping on the metro to go meet my family for church and brunch. Given that it was a Sunday, the platform was pretty empty. I immediately noticed a guy sort of lurking around me and could feel his eyes on me. I was a little bit uncomfortable, but brushed it off. Once the train arrived I got on and he followed. I took a seat and he came and sat directly next to me when there were several open seats. I turned and faced the window and made a call in an attempt to ignore him. A few moments later, I noticed a glare in the window of something he was holding out almost in front of me. When I turned forward to see what it was, I saw he was holding his ipod out to show me. The ipod had pornography playing on it.

I immediately got stood up and yelled at him and told him he was a pig. I got off at the next stop and switched to a different train. It was one of the most disgusting and degrading things I have ever experienced.

– TCA

Location: Washington, DC Metro