Stop Street Harassment

Making Public Spaces Safe and Welcoming

Weekly Round Up: November 14, 2010

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Story Submissions Recap:

I accept street harassment submissions from anywhere in the world. Share your story!

In the News, On the Blogs:

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Ten Tweets from the Week:

  • HollabackPGH don’t whistle @ me while i’m riding my bike dwn yr street. i’m just tryng 2 enjoy the sun & buy olive oil #streetharassment
  • sospokesaroj: #amanshouldnot catcall a girl. Who in their right mind thinks girls actually respond favorably to that?
  • annikaleigh Most confusing catcall ever: “hey! Youre kinda…not ugly cute.” At least be clever when youre objectifying me, idiot.
  • mz_laf: I almost had to karate chop this dude in the Train station. He tried to grab me. I am not the one | Damn shame #StreetHarassment
  • RevoltRealWomen Just b/c a woman has chosen 2 exercise her freedom 2 walk down the same st as you, does NOT give u the right 2 assault & harass her
  • SamKusek Guys who harass women on the street make ladies feel like they’re unsafe anywhere but their own homes. It takes us back two steps.
  • TheSceneSerene #angryblackwomantweet death to dudes that want to publically harass and embarrass u on the street.
  • kaalakawaa Even if a person walked down the street in a micro-mini, the harassment is the fault of the harasser not the harassed
  • JessiDG: “Paranoia is a female rite of passage.” #streetharassment and @FourSquare http://shar.es/0BMdQ
  • buttersburke There is an app that counters street harassment from guys??? Does it shoot & kill them instantly??
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A mother with a long way to go

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I feel as if I rarely get harassed now (knock on wood), but when it happens, it’s annoying. And once again, as mentioned in the story back when I was called N-word in August, it hurts when loved ones don’t back me up.

This past Friday, my mother treated me to see Tyler Perry’s “For Colored Girls…” and the first theater we went to was mobbed. (I’m not a Tyler Perry fan but am a fan of Ntozake Shange, and I can’t figure out what about Tyler Perry movies brings people out in droves, but I digress.)

The deal was that I was going to use my mother’s card to buy the tickets while she parked the car, while I kept in contact on my phone to let her know the status of tickets. I get to the kiosk and the show we wanted to see was sold out with the next one being two hours away. As I informed her of this and was proceeding to leave the theater, some dummy pushed me and told me “Move!” I wasn’t in his way!

I forgot to hang up my phone as I went to confront this guy, telling him I wasn’t in his way and he had no right to push me, and once again, like in the last story, my mother hears me and she’s yelling “What are you doing? Stop! Just leave!” The satisfaction of this guy standing there looking humiliated (while some other guy laughed at him being told off by me) disappeared because of my mother thinking I’m a child incapable of defending myself and thinking for myself and her constantly blaming me for things that go wrong.

My mother has been exposed to your site and is interested in your book and has become more educated about street harassment, so to speak, but I still feel she has a long way to go before she 1) realizes I’m an adult and if I feel like defending myself, I will (I haven’t lived under her roof in years, so I don’t get why she can’t see me as an autonomous woman) and 2) I’m not to blame for what happens to me. I didn’t ask for that guy to push and snip at me to “Move!”

I get into the car and tell her what happened to cause me to go off, and she gives a perfunctory “Well, that theater gets crowded and attracts rowdy people…we should’ve went somewhere else.”

I just want to feel as if she’ll have my back 100%, for once. I don’t know why she can’t.

– Tired of Being Harassed

Location: AMC Hoffman 22 (Alexandria, VA)

Share your street harassment story today and help raise awareness about the problem. Include your location and it will be added to the Street Harassment Map.

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Masturbators on NYC subway, lewd commenters on buses in Chennai

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In two weeks I’ll be presenting on the harassment of women on public transportation at the 3rd International Conference on Women’s Safety in India (and today I’m in Denver at the National Women’s Studies Association Conference to present on making campuses safer).

Harassment on public transportation is a HUGE problem, as shown by countless stories and news stories on here over the years, and today, by two of the stories that came through in my google alert for “sexual harassment.”

In the first, New York Times reporter Karen Zraick wrote about her experiences with men masturbating at her on the subways of New York and she said she didn’t report any of those instances. She has opened up the thread asking readers, “Have you encountered unwanted harassment, groping or flashing? How have you dealt with it?”

It’s a big deal that she shared her stories when so many women feel silenced and that she used her powerful New York Times platform to put this issue out there into public discourse in a way that, say, my blog cannot. Certainly go over there and share your stories and show the general public how many women deal with this!

And I also wanted to note a story from The Times of India. Harassment of women on buses is a big deal throughout India and this article focuses on the problem in Chennai. Police and transit authorities have identified seven bus routes that many women take as the ones where the harassment is the worse. In response, they are sending out undercover police officers to the bus stops and on the bus lines to help crack down on it.Via The Times of India:

“Men of all ages indulge in harassment of women. Some are teenagers, others elderly men. It is a daily ordeal,” said Radhika Kumar, a college student who travels by 29 C. She said MTC should have its own force to deal with such people.

Since such incidents happen in crowded buses, many women said that plying more buses on the identified routes would help. “Route 27H needs many more buses as hundreds of working women and college students take this route,” said Prathibha Francis, a college lecturer.

The police will deploy more personnel at bus stops on these routes, including personnel in plainclothes. “Once the MTC gives us details of the routes, we will deploy more personnel,” said Shakeel Akhter, additional commissioner of police (law and order).

In other places in India, authorities have resorted to creating women-only buses, trains, or even lines for buses, so this is an interesting, new tactic. I hope that penalties for harassment will help prevent it.

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“Some guy said he would let me fart in his mouth and hold it in until I told him to let it out”

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I’m glad I found this site. I feel more in control knowing there are actions I can take instead of feeling angry and helpless.

A few days prior, this was my story.

When stepping off the trolley, before my foot even hit the pavement, “Bitch nice glasses” was hollered at me. I was caught off guard and didn’t say anything, but am sure I made an angry, uncomfortable face.

When he didn’t get the response he was looking for he attempted to demand my attention by yelling, “Anyone ever do this to you?” and licked in between his fingers, motioning that he was going down on a woman. I hate that gesture, when has that ever been sexy? It’s gross and infuriates me. I flicked him off, told him he was rude and to f* off. Then he calls me a cunt cause I wasn’t excited about it. I apologized to a mother and child for swearing in front of them and the dude started at it again.

I was so angry, I called him an ignorant pig, shook my textbook at him and said I should beat him with it. He then dropped his pants and smacked his bare ass as he walked away. It made me so mad I cried in the bus stop. It happens so fast. I’m glad he left when he did.

His intention was to get a rise out of me and he was successful. The only thing worse than that feeling, is knowing the other person is getting away with it and will do it again. I’m glad to now know strategies to detour that behavior.

This isn’t the first time. I’ve been followed for blocks, crossed the street only for them to cross with me. I’ve been told my tattoo on my chest is “begging for his head to be shoved between my tits.”

“Does the carpet match the drapes?” & “Can I get your number?” are common introduction sentences.

I’ve been told all the dirty things someone would want to do to me while in a gas station. Some guy said he would let me fart in his mouth and hold it in until I told him to let it out. I didn’t even know people did that. Another guy asked me, “What I could do with 9 inches.”

Seriously? That is not something you ask/tell a stranger. It is disrespectful, disgusting and made me feel 100% uncomfortable.

I don’t dress provocatively, I rarely wear makeup. I am a 5’9″ nerd. Not someone “begging for it” (sarcasm, an outfit does not justify harassment). People would say I am nice. I’m not one to yell fuck you at a bus stop, but there I was doing it.

For someone to make another human being feel this uncomfortable and unsafe, only because they are different, is immoral.

– Anonymous

Location: Cleveland, OH

Share your street harassment story today and help raise awareness about the problem. Include your location and it will be added to the Street Harassment Map.

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“As soon as they saw me they started making sexual comments”

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This is a story i want to share which happened a while ago. I was at my house waiting for my boyfriend to come around. When i looked out of my window to see if he was walking up the road, i did see him – being hassled by a group of lads. I quickly ran to the door to see what the commotion was and ready to defend my man.

When i stood by the door, i could hear the boys teasing him and asking him if he would do this ‘beat box’ sound. Now you’re probably wondering what i mean by that. The beat box is like a beating noise rappers do, pretty difficult to explain really. Me and my boyfriend had been harassed before over it. Anyway, i yelled at the idiots to leave him alone as my boyfriend came up my path.

As soon as they saw me (a woman) of course they started making sexual comments to me and laughing together. I was furious. I told them to fuck off while my boyfriend threatened to call the police and slammed the door. We didn’t call the cops in the end because they left but i was mad. It ruined my night.

– Clarice

Location: Wales, UK

Share your street harassment story today and help raise awareness about the problem. Include your location and it will be added to the Street Harassment Map.

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