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Harasser threatens to shoot woman who ignores him

November 19, 2014 By HKearl

Trigger Warning.

Despite what some people think, ignoring a harasser can lead to escalation too. There is no magic response that can keep everyone safe. That’s why we have to focus on stopping harassment in the first place. I am so glad she was able to get away safely!!

Via Komo News:

“SEATTLE — A woman was threatened at gunpoint in a convenience store parking lot last Tuesday after she ignored two men calling out to her and trying to get her to talk to them, according to the Seattle Police Department.

According to the police report for the incident, the victim was walking into a convenience store in the 12300 block of 15th Avenue Northeast around 2 a.m. when two men hanging out by a black or dark blue Cadillac repeatedly yelled “hey” at her to get her attention.

The victim ignored the men, but they were still there when she left the store. They reportedly asked the victim what she was doing and if she wanted to hang out with them.

The victim continued to ignore the men and got into her car. Unfortunately for her, the men didn’t take the hint, according to the report.

The men approached the victim’s car and one of them reportedly opened her door and wouldn’t let her close it. The victim later told officers she was afraid, so she put the car into reverse and started to back out of the parking lot.

According to the report, that’s when one of the men said, “[Expletive] this; I’m going to shoot you,” pulled a handgun out of his pants and pointed it at the victim.

Terrified, the victim continued to back out of the parking lot and was able to drive home and call 911. Officers went to the convenience store, but the men were already gone.”

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Filed Under: News stories

Saudi Arabia: A Ban on “Seductive Eyes”

November 17, 2014 By HKearl

Well if you thought women’s bodies couldn’t be policed any further… in Saudi Arabia women can’t have “tempting eyes” showing….

Via Pakistan Today:

“A new law in Saudi Arabia banning ‘tempting eyes’ has become the latest example of female oppression in the country.

The law states that women with alluring eyes will be forced to wear a full veil… Sheikh Motlab al Nabet, spokesman of the Saudi Arabian Committee for the Promotion of Virtue and the Prevention of Vice, said they ‘had the right’ to force women to cover their face.

‘The men of the committee will interfere to force women to cover their eyes, especially the tempting ones,’ he said.‘We have the right to do so.’

Many commentators wondered how the word ‘tempting’ would be applied. One unnamed journalist in the country suggested it referred to ‘uncovered eyes with a nice shape and makeup.’

‘Or even without makeup, if they are beautiful, the woman will be in trouble,’ they added.”

This outrageous mindset is not new. In 2008, I wrote about this story on the blog:

“A Muslim cleric in Saudi Arabia has called on women to wear a full veil, or niqab, that reveals only one eye.

Sheikh Muhammad al-Habadan said showing both eyes encouraged women to use eye make-up to look seductive.”

No law was passed at that time and it is disappointing to see that Saudi Arabia has gone backward and has codified this form of body policing.

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Filed Under: News stories

Suspect Charged in Spears’ Murder

November 15, 2014 By HKearl

Trigger Warning!

Via Huffington Post

“A suspect has been charged in connection with the death of Mary “Unique” Spears, aDetroit woman shot to death after allegedly rejecting the man’s sexual advances.

Mark Dorch, 38, was charged with first degree murder and assault with intent to murder, among other charges. His trial is scheduled to begin February 9….

Though the circumstances that surround Spears’ death are not entirely clear, her story has been shared frequently online at a time when street harassment has been at the forefront of feminist conversations. It’s served as an extreme example of the danger women can face when they receive unwanted attention from men, and a powerful refutation of the argument that such harassment is harmless.

Writer, activist and social worker Feminista Jones began using the #YouOKSis hashtag on Twitter earlier this year in an effort to shine a light on black women’s experiences with street harassment and discuss solutions, namely non-confrontational intervention from bystanders. She told The Huffington Post that Spears’ tragic death also illuminates racial disparities in conversations about street harassment and its consequences.

“Often, black women and women of color are subjected to more harsh or harsher forms of street harassment,” Jones said. “I think that black womanhood has been devalued so much that we are more likely to be treated as property or as objects than maybe other woman, [though] that’s not to say that other women aren’t treated that way.”

Spears had a fiancé and three sons, ages 8, 4 and 1.

“I hope that her family finds some sort of reprieve from this tragic, tragic death that should never have happened,” Jones said. “No woman should lose her life because she declines a man’s advances.”

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Filed Under: News stories, race, street harassment

“The first time I was mistaken for a sex worker…”

November 13, 2014 By HKearl

Stop Street Harassment’s board member Maureen Evans Arthurs bravely shared some of her personal stories in an op-ed for the Washington Post about men at events presuming she is a sex worker just because she is a Black woman with a white husband. She had never shared them before.

“The first time I was mistaken for a sex worker I was on my husband’s arm at an event in California four years ago. A man approached me, asking if he could buy me a drink. I declined, and he proceeded to whisper to me, “How much?”

In my naivete, I asked, “How much for what?” It wasn’t until I looked him in the eye that I understood exactly what he meant. I was speechless, angry and embarrassed. I hastily walked away while flashing the ring on my left hand, hoping to indicate that I was married. To this day, I wonder if he thought I was laying out my price.

I relived the incident in my head over and over again, almost excusing his behavior. Here I was, a tall, dark-skinned, thin, twenty-something woman on the arm of a white man in his mid-thirties. How mismatched and odd, I thought, we may have looked to some.

Our relationship now spans a decade. But that hasn’t stopped the repeated propositions a few times each year. Just last month, at another event, several male acquaintances propositioned me. Comments ranged anywhere from, “You’re  on the wrong arm, sweetie, I wish  I could go home with you…” to the incredibly forward, “We have this whole place to ourselves, it’ll be a shame if we don’t maximize our time here and slip away?” all said within 10 to 15 feet of my husband.

Until I began writing this piece, I never told my husband about any of these incidents because they were incredibly humiliating. I am not alone. This has happened to dozens of my friends and colleagues.”

I contributed to her article, bringing in the context of for this racism and sexism:

“While there is not research specifically on black women being solicited for sex, a national study on street harassment conducted by GfK, a top research agency, found that more African American respondents experienced street harassment than other racial groups — for example, 48 percent experienced verbal harassment, compared with 45 percent of Hispanic respondents and 36 percent of white respondents. Stop Street Harassment, a nonprofit organization dedicated to documenting and ending street harassment worldwide, has found in story submissions to the blog and conversations with women after workshops that dark-skinned women are more likely than light-skinned women to be asked questions like, “How much?” by men in public spaces.

Instances of mistaken identity are especially common for transgender women of color, like Monica Jones, who was arrested and accused of prostitution in 2013 for simply walking through an area the police officer said was “known for prostitution.” It also happens to girls. In Galveston, Tex., three police officers were sued by a couple who said the officers arrested and beat their then-12-year-old daughter in 2009 after mistaking her for a prostitute.

For centuries people have stereotyped women of color as overly sexual, promiscuous and sexually available, as well as in need of policing. Scholars like bell hooks, Deirde Davis and Patricia Hill Collins have written about how from the time of slavery through the present, the creation and perpetuation of a racist myth that black women are promiscuous, sexual animals and Jezebel temptresses has been used to justify their sexual, economic and social subjugation.

But this is about more than just being seen as sex objects. It’s also about respectability and the right to be in public spaces. Joanne N. Smith is the founder of Girls for Gender Equity, an organization that works with young women of color in Brooklyn, said these young women have “shared countless stories of being stopped by the truancy police and having to show ID to prove that they are who they say they are and that they are where they are supposed to be” — often when they are en route to their internship with GGE. She sees their experiences as similar to that of black women who are assumed to be sex workers because “it’s dehumanizing and devaluing of women of color and is a form of policing of our bodies by community and law enforcement.”

Maureen’s stories and this issue in general is touching a nerve. It is the 4th most read story on the Washington Post and, as of 5 p.m., it has just over 200 comments. WOW.

One of the best aspects of op-ed writing, blogging, and tweeting is that the story is in our hands and we can choose to bring forward important, under-reported stories. #SoProud of Maureen for sharing these stories; they clearly needed to be shared.

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Filed Under: News stories, street harassment

10 hours of walking as so-and-so

November 11, 2014 By HKearl

There are a lot of copy-cat “10 hours of walking as so-and-so” videos being made. If someone isn’t harassed in those 10 hours, like the woman in Mumbai isn’t and the woman in New Zealand wasn’t, then some are saying street harassment isn’t a problem in that city.

Most harassed people are not harassed daily so just because they weren’t harassed while being filmed doesn’t mean it doesn’t happen.

Also, as I argued two weeks ago, we CANNOT rely on hidden camera videos alone to learn about #streetharassment for many reasons outlined in my article. We’d do better to talk to the people we know about their experiences and then strategize actions we can each take to help stop street harassment.

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Filed Under: News stories, street harassment

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