I am a Canadian girl who lived in France for a semester. In that time, I developed anxiety about going outside, even three minutes away to the grocery store. I could not leave the house without feeling threatened by leering, cat-calling men, usually middle-aged, yelling sexually vulgar remarks or in several cases, grabbing parts of my body. I was in shock and disbelief at the sexism and misogyny I discovered, specifically in Paris.

I began to wear different clothes and felt a change in my attitude – normally a happy-go-lucky, positive person, I became withdrawn, anxious, and angry. Angry I could no longer express myself without being made to feel as though it was a cry for attention, that I was ASKING for their commentary and harassment.

The peak of this issue was one evening by a canal in Paris, when a man tried to join my conversation with a friend. We politely declined several times and he grew angry. He ripped my headband off my head, threw my belongings in the river, took my cigarettes and I feared he would hit me, or push me in the canal too. I was shaken, shocked and most of all astonished that NO ONE came to help – even though it was in a busy area.

I booked a flight home several weeks earlier than planned.

– Anonymous

Location: Paris, France

My story is more than one incident. Growing up I learned not to take walks, to never acknowledge people, and pretend to talk on the phone (with 911 already dialed).

I began riding a bike for exercise, as I receive less comments and gestures, although they still happen.

The most recent was when a car came up right a long side me, a man leaned out and seemed to try and grab me while yelling, “HEY B****!!!” I wasn’t sure what to do, so I kept going and thankfully another car came up, so he had to go back in his lane.

I’ve had people make offers for me to sell my body, as if I were on auction. I’ve had people call me names, whistle, etc. In one walk I could have four incidents. I stopped walking to church, because it got to uncomfortable and someone would follow me consistently.

When I go out with my male friend, it is so NICE not to have the comments or be on guard as much. I was shocked the first time walking around the city with him how NO ONE tired anything. It makes me want to have an escort all the time. Which is extremely sad.

I’ve become to expect the harassment, and am pleasantly surprised when I don’t receive any. However, most of the time I get at least some. I don’t even bring up all the incidents to people, cause I know they will think they aren’t a big deal.

– Anonymous

Location: Where doesn’t it happen?

I’ve been getting stared at in the streets since I was about 13. I’m 17 now. And recently it’s been getting really hot where I live, so I’ve been wearing shorter shorts, that come a couple of inches or so above mid thigh. Apparently riding my bike and wearing these shorts with a tshirt is an invitation for older men to honk and stare at me.

I also go swing dancing every once in a while, and I’m constantly told by the men there: “Come on, smile! You have a beautiful smile!”
It makes me so angry that men think they have the right to tell me when to smile and that I should do so for them, as if I owe them something. I don’t owe you anything, I’ll smile if and when I feel like it!

– R

Location: Atlanta, GA

I am the kind of person that just ignore “compliments.” I don’t feel shame or angry when I receive them, I just forgot as I pass away because they don’t deserve any of my feelings.

But this time that man went too far.

It was morning and I was going to my office. An old man (about 60-70 idk) in his car yelled at me “Hey baby!”

As always, I pretend not to hear. He continued: “Hey, need a ride? Come here I’ll PAY you! How much is it?”

And that was the moment. That was an insult. I HAD to fight back.

I turn back, big smile on my face, and said with loud voice, “Hey you! How old are you? 80? [I know he wasn’t that old]” and I continued, “Your life is very near to the [natural] end*, so why don’t you think about your health instead of bothering young ladies?”

I saw his face turn red to purple. I walked away, smiling.

Was I rude pointing at his oldness? Yes, indeed. And I’m proud of it. You know why?

Because he “ASKED FOR IT.”

*There is a proverb in my dialect for saying this but I do not know how to translate it

Do you have any suggestions for dealing with harassers and/or ending street harassment in general?

I think education is the key, especially for young boy. Then I would educate young girl too, not to be ashamed of what they are. There is no way a girl “ask for it.” But most important of all, media should stop to objectified woman. I think this constant advertising on the virility of men who come out only by subduing women, has affected both men and women in their stereotypes.

– EZ

Location: Italy