This is not a specific story. I just wanted to say thank you for this blog, it has helped me so much to read the stories and the tips for how to deal with street harassment. I can not even start to count how many times I’ve been harassed in public – called to, asked rude questions, being followed, grabbed, molested, more than once masturbated at, getting dry humped, everything by men I didn’t know.

I never said anything, I am shy and I was scared, surprised that this would even happen to me, not knowing what to say. I always just did my best to ignore them, and walked away. And I also thought that this was somehow a good strategy, that it was safest, that maybe all they wanted was to provoke and get some kind of response, and that it would be better to just leave it all. I have accepted that this is something that happens a lot, and that there is nothing I can do to change it.

Then I read other stories and that (unless it seems unsafe) you should say something back and show them that it is not ok.

And it is true.

Since I met my girlfriend, it’s different when we are out together. We do get harassed for being lesbians, but I still get the comments directed only to me (she never gets street harassed, I really don’t know why it’s such a difference), and she is always calling them out on it, for us and for me. It feels so good when she does that, to see their jeers wiped away from their faces.

I still have to get up the courage to be able to do this myself, but I do because I know now, that just being quiet and walking away is not the best option for me. I stood up and told a man he had crossed the line in a subway recently, when he asked if, “I didn’t just dream about cock.”

I can’t begin to say how great it is with initiatives like these. Thank you for helping me finally be able to say no.

– Anonymous

This goes beyond the usual shouting and name-calling I’ve experienced before, and I’m still in shock about what happened.

On 13 October, I was walking on a street in the city centre of Brussels, Belgium, on my way to catch the tram. It was about 18:00 so still bright outside. A young man walking alone in the opposite direction to me brushed against my shoulder as we crossed paths and spat in my face.

He just walked on! He didn’t say anything!

I was completely shocked. I didn’t see his face, I didn’t even look at him, and I wish I had been able to react! After he walked on I turned to shout after him, but he totally ignored me and kept going. I felt completely violated and aggressed.

There were other people on the street at that time. Nobody stopped to ask me if I was ok. Nobody tried to stop the young man.

I tried to clean my face with a tissue, but was still in shock. About ten minutes later I completely broke down and had to call my husband. He came and took me home and helped clean me up and made some sweet tea for me.

I have never felt so aggressed on the streets of the city centre of Brussels. I have, sadly, often experienced street harassment here before (and not only in Brussels, in most places I’ve been). Shouting, name-calling, propositions, cars slowing down and honking etc. This was the first time something so physical happened.

Later that evening I joined some friends for dinner. I took the long journey by metro and tram to meet them just to avoid walking on the streets as much as possible. My friends shared their experiences of street harassment with me, and I am now totally fed up. When will this end? Why are women so disrespected?

I am so angry that women and girls suffer this in their daily lives. My husband suggested I buy a pepper spray bomb. This is not the solution. The solution is that this stops happening and women are comfortable walking through the streets of their home!

– Claire

Location: De Brouckère, Brussels, Belgium

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I was 21 and a college student. Having little money I always took the bus across town. Most of the time the other passengers ignored me and I ignored them. But one day, it was different.

A man at least twice my age kept trying to catch my eye. When I finally looked at him, thinking he wanted to ask me something, he winked at me and handed me a slip of paper with his phone number on it and some sort of comment on the lines of, “You’re hot! Call me!”

I looked back at him feeling creeped out and saw him grinning and leering at me. I said nothing to him and forced myself to stare out the window for the rest of the ride. I was frightened and embarrassed. I refused to look at him. I didn’t know what to do. I was afraid that he might follow me, so when the bus came into the square downtown I fled the bus as fast as possible and ran for the nearest public building – a coffee shop. As I was sitting there, trying to calm down and make sense of what had happened, I looked at the slip of paper in my hands and felt a sudden wave of rage and humiliation. I crumpled it up and threw it as hard as I could into the nearest garbage can.

– Anonymous

Location: Cincinnati, OH

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Years ago I was at a gas station payphone at 4 am to give directions to a friend coming in town. In sweats looking not cute at all- some guy getting gas at the station started cat calling etc. I was enraged. I yelled back at him in my most sarcastic tone, “Are you f-ing kidding me???? has that EVER really worked for you???”

He jumped in his truck and left. He was pissed though…

– JR

Location: Memphis, TN

Donate to help fund a national study on street harassment.

Share your street harassment story today and help raise awareness about the problem.