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“Don’t dress like such a dirty little SLAG”

September 21, 2012 By Contributor

I was recently waiting at a bus stop on my way back from the doctors. I was wearing black leggings, a shirt and a big cardigan as it was a little chilly. My bus was very late so I was daydreaming and had my head turned round looking at something else.

I was startled by someone beeping crazily at me. It was a young lad on his own in a black BMW. He was yelling at me while cruising past really slowly. The beeping made me jump and he was telling me how sexy I was so I stuck my middle finger up at him. In response to this he slammed his breaks on, climbed half way out his window and shouted at me, “Don’t dress like such a dirty little SLAG if you don’t want the attention then you stupid bitch,” and he drove off yelling.

This was in the middle of no where and the fact he stopped to shout at me was obviously very unsettling.

I frequently get yelled at and stick my fingers up, only to guys getting angry I don’t want to jump in their van and have it off there and then! I am sick of being treated this way, it’s as if I am made to feel I deserve this 24/7 harassment just because I am blonde or whatever.

– Emily Denton

Location: Norwich, Norfolk, England

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Filed Under: Stories, street harassment

“I felt violated, bewildered and too stunned to react”

September 20, 2012 By Contributor

A man groped my bum as I was walking out of the tube on my way to my rape counselling session. I felt violated, bewildered and too stunned to react. By the time I’d composed myself to think of something to say it was too late. I walked to my session in tears.

– Anonymous

Location: Seven Sisters, UK

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Filed Under: Stories, street harassment

“That “idiot” ruined the rest of my day”

September 19, 2012 By Contributor

My boyfriend and I went on holiday to Blackpool last week. There were a few incidents of harassment and I have to say one of them really upset me….

As usual I got a few funny looks off people (I should be used to it by now) the odd “Ew” muttered as I walked past but what really struck me down was when I was walking through the town centre, near the Blackpool tower and a man walked past me looking me up and down then said “fucking hell” in a what I would describe a “disgusted” tone. It happened so quickly and unexpected. I turned around to look at him and he kept looking back at me with a smirk on his face. I felt absolutely awful. I was full up with a cold and was already feeling miserable because it wore me down when I was supposed to be enjoying myself.

My boyfriend didn’t see it happen because he was a few metres ahead of me. I told him and he just told me that people like him are idiots. Yes that’s true but that “idiot” ruined the rest of my day. I didn’t feel like doing anything else and just wanted to go straight back to the hotel and cry out of frustration. But for his sake I swallowed my anger and continued “enjoying” our day.

Just to note, I know I shouldn’t have to justify myself but no I am not the most attractive woman. I am slightly overweight, taller than the average female, have my hair natural because straightening it takes up too much time and wear light make up. I don’t doll myself up like most women my age do (I’m 21) I never even used to wear make up but I’m self conscious of my pale face so I wear some light foundation. I love my long red wavy hair but sometimes it gets frizzy. Because I was feeling under the weather that day I didn’t look my best.

I am so sick of constantly feeling worried about the way I look. Just because I’m a woman, I have to look pretty despite how I’m feeling otherwise I am going to be judged. That is exactly what happened that day. Fed up isn’t the word.

– Clarice

Location: Blackpool, UK

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Filed Under: Stories, street harassment

Digest of street harassment stories, news, announcements & tweets: September 16, 2012

September 16, 2012 By HKearl

Read stories, news articles, blog posts, and tweets about street harassment from the past few weeks.

** Sign up to receive a monthly e-newsletter from Stop Street Harassment ***

Street Harassment Stories:

Share your story! You can read street harassment stories on the Web at:

Stop Street Harassment Blog

HarassMap in Egypt

Bijoya in Bangladesh

Resist Harassment in Lebanon

Ramallah Street Watch in Palestine

Name and Shame in Pakistan

Safe Streets in Yemen

Street Harassment in South Africa

Many of the Hollaback sites

Street Harassment In the News, on the Blogs:

* The F Word Blog, “Spanish feminist subjected to harassment campaign“

* Lesoir.be, “Bruxelles punit les sexistes“

* Le Nouvel Observateur, “Harcèlement de rue : les femmes racontent le machisme“

* Women’s Media Center, “Native Americans Speak Out About Street Harassment“

* Torontoist, “New Mobile App “Not Your Baby” Calls Out Sexual Harassment“

* The Guilfordian, “Sexual harassment in Egypt escalates“

* LAist, “Women Share Their Stories Of Sexual Harassment (And Worse) On Public Transportation”

* XO Jane, “I Think We Should Have a Collective Response To Strangers Who Tell Us To Smile”

* Radio Free Europe Radio Liberty, “Baghdad Neighborhood Imposes Strict Dress Code On Women“

* Bikyamasr, “Sexual harassment awaits Egyptian girls outside schools“

* Washington Post, “In Egypt, a backlash against harassment“

* Lydia, “TAKE BACK THE DAY: ON BRINGING AN END TO STREET HARASSMENT“

* A Thrift Store, “Midge and I have a Chat About a Streetcar Named Anger“

* Cardboard Sunshine, ““The learning process is something you can incite, literally incite, like a riot.””

* SocialistAlternative.org, “Fighting back against street harassment“

* xoJane, “Where’s Your Line Between Flirting and Harassment?“

* DelawareOnline.com, “Officials: Man exposed himself at beach restrooms“

* Alternet.org, “Porn Star Stoya Speaks Out on Street Harassment“; Jezebel, “I’m a Porn Star, and if You Harass Me I Will Punch You in the Balls“

* NBCNews.com, “Suspect arrested in rape of 73-year-old birdwatcher in New York’s Central Park“

* Guardian, “Central Park rape sparks debate about social media making women safer”

* College Gloss, “Combating Street Harassment: What You Should Know“

* Sparkwood & 21, “The Story of My Sexual Assault on Muni in San Francisco“

Announcements:

New:

* Harlow Project Seeking Participants For Street Harassment Web Video Series

* METRAC released a free “Not Your Baby App” to provide responses you can use when experiencing harassment

* In San Francisco, there is a new arts-based anti-street harassment initiative called Little Bird SF

* Male allies won prestigious awards for their anti-street harassment initiatives this spring.

* Hollaback Istanbul released a new anti-harassment video featuring male allies

* In Washington, DC, Collective Action for Safe Spaces and Voices of Men acted out an anti-harassment skit on the Metro. You can do this in your city too!

* Talalo, an Afghan graffiti band, fights street harassment by putting messages on street walls.

* Denice Frohman, Poet, performs “Dear Straight People”


Reminders:

* Sign a petition about ending street harassment in Egypt.

* Stop Street Harassment recently incorporated as a nonprofit organization. Please donate so we can conduct a national street harassment study and gather much needed data documenting the problem.

* Contact Bowlmor and the New York City Transit to complain about this offensive subway ad.

* Activists in South Africa launched a website about street harassment

* The anti-sexual harassment public service announcement signs are now up in several Washington, DC metro stations!

* The Stop Street Harassment book is available in paperback for $15.

* Submit art about street harassment for the VoiceTool Product exhibit in San Francisco, CA

* The Adventures of Salwa campaign has a hotline for sexual harassment cases in Lebanon: 76-676862.

* In Bangalore, India, there is a helpline for street harassment 080 – 22943225 / 22864023

* Report #streetharassment in Pakistan at @NameAndShamePk, email nameandshame@ryse.pk, SMS 0314-800-35-68 or online at http://www.nameandshame.pk

10 Tweets from the Week:

1. @harassmap It is time this is escalated, we’re losing our lives to harassers, silence has never been more disgraceful. #endSH #Egypt #Enough

2. @alicexz I usually respond to sexual harassment on the street by 1.) INTENTLY TEXTING A NON-EXISTENT PERSON, or 2.) “No English!”

3.  @Hollaback_DSM Being a male ally isn’t about what you DON’T do (harass) but what you DO do: confront other men. Together we will end #streetharassment

4. @PennyRed Ah, New York street harassment, how I haven’t missed you #hollaback #alwaysabittooscaredtohollaback

5. @mortari If you’ve never been catcalled or followed, then yes, you are missing information which is relevant to discussion of street harassment.

6. @TheCariLand Why do guys feel it’s ok to catcall out a car window or honk at females?

7. ‏@TheFemaleWiz There’s a fine line between charming and creepy.On that note,there’s a place reserved in hell for dudes that catcall on ladies!

8. @AngryWriterGirl I’ve said it once, I’ll say it a million times more: Don’t believe in #streetharassment? Walk a few steps behind a woman on a sunny day.

9. @nd_kane @anaees Agreed, so not okay. There’s a whole campaign about Street Harassment online that’s worth a look: https://stopstreetharassment.org

10. @MarwaMfarid Who is ready to participate in an experience to document the fact that even Niqab wearing women are sexually harassed #EndSH #Egypt

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Filed Under: male perspective, News stories, Resources, Stories, street harassment, weekly round up

“I’m saying, ‘Please. Just. Stop.'”

September 14, 2012 By Contributor

I just went to the supermarket, and on my way home I got cat-called from a car. I told a female friend this yesterday and her first response was, “Oh my god, what were you wearing?” so I’ll address that completely irrelevant question here: long-sleeved baggy top, baggy jeans; it was laundry day so I looked awful.

Anyway what really bothers me about it is that it knocked me back for all of about three seconds while I glared at the car and then I went back to my usual bubbly self – which is fine, that’s great – but I thought to myself, “Well, at least being catcalled from a (fast-moving car is like the least scary form of street harassment.” Even I’M normalising this stuff now. That can’t be a good thing.

It’s not normal, it’s not acceptable, and it’s sleazy as all get-out, so guys: I’m not saying “if you’re going to catcall, do it from a car.” I’m saying, “Please. Just. Stop.” I don’t have time to waste on dealing with your rubbish. I’m just trying to do my shopping.

– Anonymous

Location: Canterbury, UK

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Filed Under: Stories, street harassment

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