Stop Street Harassment

Making Public Spaces Safe and Welcoming

“I was honestly so scared that I went into a safe place and shut off”

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Last night I was going out to a club on the west side and had one of the worst harassment experiences I have ever had. I waiting for the E and I saw this guy staring at me so I moved down and thought I shook him off.

The uptown train pulled in and I was like sweet! No one on the train… I get on and he came in right after I did. He sat across from me and was looking at me all weird. He was holding his phone like he could be filming me but I was like whatever.

So the doors close and her starts rubbing his crotch and is still pointing his phone right at me. I have read posts on this site before and am so proud of the women that say something. I was petrified… I couldn’t even say anything.

Then I hear “because of traffic there are delays…etc” the train was stopped and then this guy actually pulled out his penis and jerks off. He was calling me a little slut and saying how I wanted to get laid tonight. It felt like an hour and the train started again and he kept doing it and pointing his phone right at me. I got up and stood by the door and he kept saying stuff to me. I wish I would have said something to him but I was honestly so scared that I went into a safe place and shut off.

I am so proud of the women that say something. I REALLY wish I did. On the upside… I had a great Saturday night out and don’t give a shit about that asshole

– Tanya

Location: E Train, New York City, NY

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A guy who couldn’t take a hint

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My friend and I were walking from her workplace to a restaurant for lunch when we heard a man behind us call out to us. We turned around and watched as he ran the last few steps up to us. We are both gregarious by nature and didn’t assume immediately that the guy was a creep, but then he opened his mouth to tell us how he had been following us for a block and a half trying to get our attention.

He then went on to extol the virtues of my friend’s beauty, while completely ignoring me except to add an off hand comment about how I “looked nice too.” He did most of the talking, with my friend giving one word responses to any questions asked. He was never overtly rude or crass. I’m pretty sure he thought he was being nice. We didn’t want to seem rude ourselves, but we were giving him every signal we knew that we wanted to back away from the conversation. At one point I actually stepped a few feet back. The guy was either unable to read these signs, or was ignoring them.

Eventually my friend told him that we needed to get going, at which point he asked for her number. She lied and told him she was married. We both thought this would end the nonsense.

We thought wrong.

He then started in on how lucky her husband must be and how he hoped he appreciated her (with the not so subtle intonation that if her husband didn’t, he’d be happy to step in). We had to forcefully tell him goodbye and start walking away before he shut up.

By the time we had gotten to the restaurant we were both laughing about the “idiot creep.” However the whole experience was really uncomfortable, and not one I would care to repeat.

– S.V.

Location: Detroit, Michigan

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“I hate being a woman in a patriarchal society”

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I’m 21. Tonight I stopped at the grocery store to get some milk after my visit to the bookstore. I was reminded why I hate going anywhere by myself at night. I was verbally harassed by a gang of idiot high school boys, one that repeatedly asked me if he “smelled good.”

I ignored him until he caught up with me and said he wouldn’t leave me alone until I answered him. I turned around and met his eyes. I said, “What?”

He said, “Do I smell good”, stuffed his shirt in my face, “I’m wearing Ax.”

I said, “No, I think Ax smells like shit. Why are you asking me? There are plenty of girls in this store if you want a girl opinion, why not ask one of them?”

They remained quiet. He finally said, “Okay, I’m bothering you, right?”

I said, “What do you think?” and I left, hearing in the background, “Have a nice night.”

I hate how upset this made me feel. I am a very rational person, but in that moment it was extremely hard for me to stay calm. I felt my heart beating fast in my chest and I literally felt sick to my stomach. I hate being a woman in a patriarchal society. It’s just not fair.

– Natalie

Location: Randalls Food Market

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“Hopefully that guy learned his lesson and didn’t harass any other women that night.”

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My most recent brush with Street Harassment was this last Tuesday aka, Mardi Gras. It actually turned out to be kind of funny.

So I was on my way to meet friends. Even though I live in NOLA, I still can forget where certain streets are. I had to back track to find them. As I’m passing a group of young guys one calls out to me, “You made a huge mistake walking by yourself little girl.”

I was actually on my cell at the time. The guy proceeds to lunge at me. I’m guessing I was supposed to jump or scream in fear. That kind of behavior pisses me off.

I responded with, “Get the F*#K away from me! Don’t ever think you can approach a woman like this again, you piece of sh*t! You’re lucky I don’t kick your ass … with heels on. Now shoo” (that’s my sanitized response, pretty sure I cursed a bit more).

His friend tried to block my way, I told him in my coldest voice to “Move” then, pushed him aside. They listened. They looked shocked, even a bit embarrassed.

My friend on the phone thought I was talking to him! I had to explain what happened – that was the funny part.

The reality is that certain guys get off on trying to intimidate women. They are sick. Hopefully, that guy learned his lesson and didn’t harass any other women that night.

– Megan

Location: Royal Street, New Orleans, LA

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Street harassment snapshot: March 13, 2011

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Read stories, news articles, blog posts, and tweets about street harassment from the past week and find relevant announcements and upcoming street harassment events.

Street Harassment Stories:

I accept street harassment submissions from anywhere in the world. Share your story!

You can read new street harassment stories on the Web from the past week at:

Street Harassment in the News, on the Blogs:

Events:

  • March 15: International Approaches to Stopping Street Harassment Talk, Georgia College, Museum Education Room, Milledgeville, GA, 5 p.m.
  • March 16: Street Harassment Workshop, Georgia College, Women’s Resource Center, Milledgeville, GA, 12:30 p.m.
  • March 19: Stop Street Harassment Talk, Old Parish House/Women’s Club
    4711 Knox Road, College Park, MD, 11 a.m.
  • March 19: HarassMap is organizing anti-street harassment activism in Cairo, Egypt!
  • March 20: International Anti-Street Harassment Day – happening all over the world!
  • March 22: HollaBack London meeting, 420 Kingsland Road, unknown time

International Anti-Street Harassment Day:

It’s only two weeks away! Participate in the first annual International Anti-Street Harassment Day on March 20!!!

Announcements:

New:

On-going:

10 Tweets from the Week:

  • HollabackEP Went for a lovely walk with my mom. Yeah, I still got harassed. Doesn’t matter what you’re wearing, or who you’re with. #StreetHarassment
  • bibliofeminista Street harassed on the streets of DC today by a man who yells: “Whoa, legs!” Me: “Yup, I have them.” #gross #streetharassment
  • TingyN #saynoto abuse and harassment in the street making people feel vulnerable in their every day lives
  • FeministInti Feminism isn’t a zero sum game, we can fight against street harassment, for abortion AND to end domestic violence and rape. It all counts.
  • Tweetsbian Creepy mullet dude gave me the turn-catcall-stare on a dark sidewalk. Think my ovaries have shriveled up a bit.
  • KimberlynnAce Nope…was wrong. street harassment is rampant as ever on international women’s day. All this tells me is that we gotta go to work. #iwd2011
  • Dina_T Is there some sort of sexual street harassment quota that Egyptian men are trying to achieve today? Kefaya!
  • equalitynow From FB: Passing some kind of legislation against street harassment. There is no equality while women feel unsafe. #100steps
  • SophiaAlMaria Make street-harassment a relic of pre-revolutionary #Egypt. Support http://www.harassmap.org/ on International Women’s Day.
  • disasterous007 If you ever walk alone to your car without thinking someone might attack you, this isn’t your day. #internationalwomensday
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