Stop Street Harassment

Making Public Spaces Safe and Welcoming

“Each time he completely changed his manner”

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I commute to work, and there is not a single trip to Penn Station that I do not experience seeing harassment. Usually a man will whistle at me or another woman or stroll suggestively in her path or even say something. So many of us need to commute. I try to arrive at the station just a few minutes before the train leaves, when it is on the tracks and I can board, or I buy coffee and sit in a coffeeshop to avoid standing around waiting for the train.

Optional: Do you have any suggestions for dealing with harassers and/or ending street harassment in general?

A few times I have pointed my phone at a harasser and each time he completely changed his manner. Usually I try to look like an ordinary person, but as I get older I realize that for some men a woman is never an ordinary person. So I don’t know.

Location: Penn Station, NYC

Share your street harassment story for the blog.
See the book 50 Stories about Stopping Street Harassers for more idea.

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“Does the carpet match the curtains?”

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I get verbal abuse from strangers on a weekly basis, not just on the street but also in the supermarket while I’m doing my weekly shopping.

Why?

Because i have pink hair! What a pathetic reason to abuse someone! There are two types of people who do this: 1. The people coming up and saying they hate my hair, or just simply laughing and pointing and 2. The men who ask me, “Does the carpet match the curtains?” or comments about how i must be kinky in bed.

I’ve also had people come up and touch my hair without warning. I’m not going to change my hair colour because i like it and also the advantage is that with people behaving like this, i can weed out the people i don’t want to associate with very easily! They make it easier for me to identify who is an ******* without me even having to spend any time on them 🙂

– Anonymous

Location: Liverpool, Leicester, Birmingham, Coventry, UK. On the street, in shops/supermarkets

Share your street harassment story for the blog.
See the book 50 Stories about Stopping Street Harassers for more idea.

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UK: Making Gigs Safer!

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Tracey Wise, London, UK, SSH Blog Correspondent

Safe Gigs for Women logoIt’s 1991, and Courtney Love, performing with ‘Hole,’ stage dives in Glasgow.  It’s 1991 and Love stage dives and is violated by the crowd. It’s 1991 and I am 10.

It’s 2015 and Iggy Azalea gives an interview saying she had to stop crowd surfing because “Fans think it’s funny to finger her.” It’s 2015 and I am 34. In 24 years it appears nothing has changed.

Fandom, proper, all consuming fandom that devours your being and speaks to your soul, whether that be sport, cult TV or music, takes effort. My friends and I have repeatedly travelled the British Isles to see “one more gig” by that special artist – the ones that make life complete. Safe to say I don’t just like music, I am obsessed with it. So when the thing I love comes to represent something seedy, it breaks my heart.

Over the years I have been doing that “one more gig” or spending some of the best days of my life in a muddy field, at a festival. I have more than my fair share of harassment stories. I have been groped on more than one occasion, cornered, cat called, told by a male security guard – someone employed with the purpose of keeping festival goers safe – that the theft of my tent was nothing to worry about because “I could always sleep in his tent”. So fast forward to June 2015, I’m watching my favourite band play a career-defining gig and I‘m groped again by a complete stranger, no small talk first or even an introduction. A two handed full on grab, passed off as acceptable because “it’s the last song.” I’ve now finally had enough.

A blog written in haste the next day provokes a huge response – women telling me similar stories, and worse. Stories telling of how worryingly common harassment is happening in the background of dark, sweaty, packed-in music crowds. Some women tell of multiple experiences. Some tell of how this has impacted their own behaviour, like choosing to not go on their own to gigs or even not going at all. The music obsessive in me hates this. How can the thing I love be reduced to this?

In response, I established the ‘Safe Gigs for Women’ Twitter account, as a way for women to share their stories in an anonymous way, in order to highlight the harassment being experienced by women at gigs. This has been picked up on by a local authority in London that is well known for its music scene. Together we will be looking at improving the gig going experience with venues, gig goers and bands, in order to ensure all people, male and female get to enjoy live music, for the enjoyable, beautiful thing that it is.

You can join us! Please find us at www.sgfw.org.uk.

Born and raised in London, Tracey is a graduate of City University. She has spent the best part of her life at gigs and festivals and obsessing about music and created the “Safe Gigs for Women” project.

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“He was so embarrassed he slunk away”

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When I was 21 years old, I went to live for a year in Mexico as part of a cultural exchange. Once I took a bus to a small town and as soon as I got off the bus an older man, maybe 50ish, starting following me and saying rude things to me and looking around to make sure everyone heard him. He was feeling proud of himself. I thought he would stop after a while if he got no reaction from me but he didn’t. Eventually I’d had enough. I stopped on the street, turned around, looked at him and screamed as loudly as I could (in Spanish) ‘LEAVE ME ALONE!’

Everyone saw and heard and he was so embarrassed he slunk away. I felt great!

Optional: What’s one way you think we can make public places safer for everyone?

Raise awareness of what’s going on.

– Frances

Location: A small village in Mexico

Share your street harassment story for the blog.
See the book 50 Stories about Stopping Street Harassers for more idea.

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“I don’t deserve to be harassed”

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Lately the weather in California has been very hot so of course I wouldn’t go out of the house in a wool sweater. Instead I went out in a tank top. As soon as school was over, I immediately walked home so I could quickly get back to my cool home. I was a block away from my home where I see two young teens. They were already looking at me and I got a very uneasy feeling. I took out my phone and called my sister who was already home. While the phone was ringing I could hear the to boys trying to get my attention. One seemed to be laughing while the other tried to call me over as if I were a dog. My sister eventually answered and I asked her to come out of the house because I was being harassed. She hung up the phone and from a distance I saw her waiting for me at the front door.

I could still hear the boy yelling at me. Only this time he began to say, “Hey bitch!” over and over just because I wouldn’t turn and look at him. I felt so disgusted and angry. I tried to calm myself down to not start crying because of the frustration I felt. I found it so unfair the way they were treating me. I don’t deserve to be harassed. I was not “asking for it” because of the way I dressed. NO ONE (male, female, lesbian, gay, bi, trans, queer, etc.) DESERVES TO BE HARASSED OR WORRY IF THEIR OUTFIT IS “TOO REVEALING”.

– Anonymous

Location: California

Share your street harassment story for the blog.
See the book 50 Stories about Stopping Street Harassers for more idea.

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