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“It’s horrible to be made to feel vulnerable when doing something perfectly normal”

November 17, 2014 By Contributor

I was travelling for work in Basel, walking down the street in the evening looking for a suitable place to get dinner. For no particular reason that attracted several stares/ leers from the passing blokes. There does not seem to be many women on their own in this town. I was then followed down the street by a bloke hissing something at me under his breath. It scared me, I turned around and walked away as fast as I could, ignoring him. I saw another woman getting harassed by a different man on the way back. At home I might be tempted to say something but here in another language I don’t feel confident. It doesn’t help that every second shop window has sexy lingerie on display or there are lap-dancing bars on street corners. I’m a 40 year old professional woman and it’s horrible to be made to feel vulnerable when doing something perfectly normal.

– Anonymous

Location: Basel, Switzerland

Share your street harassment story for the blog.
See the book 50 Stories about Stopping Street Harassers for more idea

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Filed Under: Stories, street harassment

Suspect Charged in Spears’ Murder

November 15, 2014 By HKearl

Trigger Warning!

Via Huffington Post

“A suspect has been charged in connection with the death of Mary “Unique” Spears, aDetroit woman shot to death after allegedly rejecting the man’s sexual advances.

Mark Dorch, 38, was charged with first degree murder and assault with intent to murder, among other charges. His trial is scheduled to begin February 9….

Though the circumstances that surround Spears’ death are not entirely clear, her story has been shared frequently online at a time when street harassment has been at the forefront of feminist conversations. It’s served as an extreme example of the danger women can face when they receive unwanted attention from men, and a powerful refutation of the argument that such harassment is harmless.

Writer, activist and social worker Feminista Jones began using the #YouOKSis hashtag on Twitter earlier this year in an effort to shine a light on black women’s experiences with street harassment and discuss solutions, namely non-confrontational intervention from bystanders. She told The Huffington Post that Spears’ tragic death also illuminates racial disparities in conversations about street harassment and its consequences.

“Often, black women and women of color are subjected to more harsh or harsher forms of street harassment,” Jones said. “I think that black womanhood has been devalued so much that we are more likely to be treated as property or as objects than maybe other woman, [though] that’s not to say that other women aren’t treated that way.”

Spears had a fiancé and three sons, ages 8, 4 and 1.

“I hope that her family finds some sort of reprieve from this tragic, tragic death that should never have happened,” Jones said. “No woman should lose her life because she declines a man’s advances.”

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Filed Under: News stories, race, street harassment

My skin color does not mean I welcome harassment

November 14, 2014 By Contributor

I was leaving a beauty supply store dressed in regular, fully clothed jeans and an Oxford shirt when a white dude driving in his car yelled, “Hhow much for a BJ?” I am a Christian and practicing abstinence with a degree from an HBCU. I’m a missionary and basically a nun and may never even have sex. I didn’t know being brown automatically made me a whore or a prostitute…We were in a suburban well income neighborhood. Not that that matters. I am adult who lives at home.

Optional: What’s one way you think we can make public places safer for everyone?

Well it should be illegal to harass someone and hurl pornographic words at someone minding their own business. But I can’t see how that can happen. We need to have an awareness that the color of my skin does not make me a prostitute or welcome cat calls/harassment.

– AP

Location: I was walking home from the store from Maryland

Share your street harassment story for the blog.
See the book 50 Stories about Stopping Street Harassers for more idea

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Filed Under: Stories, street harassment

“The first time I was mistaken for a sex worker…”

November 13, 2014 By HKearl

Stop Street Harassment’s board member Maureen Evans Arthurs bravely shared some of her personal stories in an op-ed for the Washington Post about men at events presuming she is a sex worker just because she is a Black woman with a white husband. She had never shared them before.

“The first time I was mistaken for a sex worker I was on my husband’s arm at an event in California four years ago. A man approached me, asking if he could buy me a drink. I declined, and he proceeded to whisper to me, “How much?”

In my naivete, I asked, “How much for what?” It wasn’t until I looked him in the eye that I understood exactly what he meant. I was speechless, angry and embarrassed. I hastily walked away while flashing the ring on my left hand, hoping to indicate that I was married. To this day, I wonder if he thought I was laying out my price.

I relived the incident in my head over and over again, almost excusing his behavior. Here I was, a tall, dark-skinned, thin, twenty-something woman on the arm of a white man in his mid-thirties. How mismatched and odd, I thought, we may have looked to some.

Our relationship now spans a decade. But that hasn’t stopped the repeated propositions a few times each year. Just last month, at another event, several male acquaintances propositioned me. Comments ranged anywhere from, “You’re  on the wrong arm, sweetie, I wish  I could go home with you…” to the incredibly forward, “We have this whole place to ourselves, it’ll be a shame if we don’t maximize our time here and slip away?” all said within 10 to 15 feet of my husband.

Until I began writing this piece, I never told my husband about any of these incidents because they were incredibly humiliating. I am not alone. This has happened to dozens of my friends and colleagues.”

I contributed to her article, bringing in the context of for this racism and sexism:

“While there is not research specifically on black women being solicited for sex, a national study on street harassment conducted by GfK, a top research agency, found that more African American respondents experienced street harassment than other racial groups — for example, 48 percent experienced verbal harassment, compared with 45 percent of Hispanic respondents and 36 percent of white respondents. Stop Street Harassment, a nonprofit organization dedicated to documenting and ending street harassment worldwide, has found in story submissions to the blog and conversations with women after workshops that dark-skinned women are more likely than light-skinned women to be asked questions like, “How much?” by men in public spaces.

Instances of mistaken identity are especially common for transgender women of color, like Monica Jones, who was arrested and accused of prostitution in 2013 for simply walking through an area the police officer said was “known for prostitution.” It also happens to girls. In Galveston, Tex., three police officers were sued by a couple who said the officers arrested and beat their then-12-year-old daughter in 2009 after mistaking her for a prostitute.

For centuries people have stereotyped women of color as overly sexual, promiscuous and sexually available, as well as in need of policing. Scholars like bell hooks, Deirde Davis and Patricia Hill Collins have written about how from the time of slavery through the present, the creation and perpetuation of a racist myth that black women are promiscuous, sexual animals and Jezebel temptresses has been used to justify their sexual, economic and social subjugation.

But this is about more than just being seen as sex objects. It’s also about respectability and the right to be in public spaces. Joanne N. Smith is the founder of Girls for Gender Equity, an organization that works with young women of color in Brooklyn, said these young women have “shared countless stories of being stopped by the truancy police and having to show ID to prove that they are who they say they are and that they are where they are supposed to be” — often when they are en route to their internship with GGE. She sees their experiences as similar to that of black women who are assumed to be sex workers because “it’s dehumanizing and devaluing of women of color and is a form of policing of our bodies by community and law enforcement.”

Maureen’s stories and this issue in general is touching a nerve. It is the 4th most read story on the Washington Post and, as of 5 p.m., it has just over 200 comments. WOW.

One of the best aspects of op-ed writing, blogging, and tweeting is that the story is in our hands and we can choose to bring forward important, under-reported stories. #SoProud of Maureen for sharing these stories; they clearly needed to be shared.

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Filed Under: News stories, street harassment

When Teachers Talk about Street Harassment, Feminism

November 11, 2014 By HKearl

Street harassment is an issue many teenagers – especially teenage girls — face, but it is one that is rarely acknowledged. I am so proud to know Ileana Jiménez, Feminist Teacher, one of the few high school teachers who addresses issues like street harassment with her students, lets them share their stories, and brainstorms solutions. I’ve spoken at her school twice and she has had other street harassment activists visit her class.

You can hear about the class from her and her students in this 3 minute video produced by Elite Daily.

This work is so important. We must work with youth to break the cycle of normalcy that surrounds street harassment in our country.

She and I teamed up with AAUW last year to host the first-ever national symposium on teaching gender/feminism in high schools. We both dream of a day when students at every high school can take classes on these topics. Ileana is working hard every day to not only make this dream a reality in her classroom, but also nationally and globally by regularly presenting at conferences, traveling to places like Mexico and India to talk with educators, and giving remote advice to teachers all over the world.

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Filed Under: Resources, street harassment

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