I’m in Tampa, Florida, for the national NOW conference. This evening, I went for a five mile run near the USF campus. Within the first two miles, I was harassed twice by men going by in their cars.

I also witnessed a man in a car harass a young woman at a bus stop located on the edge of campus. As I approached her, I paused and asked her if he had just harassed her (based on her upset expression, I gathered that he had) and she said, “Yeah, I think so. That’s the third time he’s driven by and done that.”

I offered her a few words of comfort and said if he came by again, she could always tell him to stop harassing her. But she didn’t look too sure about that idea. Probably in part because besides the two of us there were no pedestrians as far as you could see in either direction, just cars, so she may not have felt safe responding. I understand that. I also should have mentioned to her that she could write down his license plate number and try reporting him, but I forgot to in the spur-of-the-moment-ness of the encounter.

A minute after I left her, a bus passed me and when I turned around, I saw it pull over and pick her up, so at least that man couldn’t harass her for a fourth time.

Despite all that I know about responding to street harassers, I tend to be the person who freezes when it happens, including when I see it happen to someone else, so I’m happy that didn’t freeze and I stopped when I saw it happen. Even though I didn’t have a chance to intervene or prevent the harassment, I hope I helped the young woman feel less alone and less upset by talking with her. And honestly, since I faced two of my own harassers, it also made me feel less alone to talk with her. (Very sad, that two out of the two women on the street got harassed, huh?)

If you see someone whose been harassed, even if you can’t do anything to stop or prevent it, consider asking if they are okay and that may make a difference and help them feel less alone.

To help you be a good bystander, here are bystander tips and success stories. And also, consider donating to the Hollaback I’ve Got Your Back bystander campaign.

– Holly

Location: North 50th Street, by USF, Tampa, Florida

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It happened on June 17, at 10:30 am at Laxmi Nagar, Delhi. A girl was waiting on the road, may be for her friend. Suddenly two guys appeared on a scooter and started teasing her. Their comments were disgusting. People were watching it and nobody said a single word. The guys became loud. They started asking fruit seller what is the prize of banana. Poor girl, she didn’t say any word, but guys were too much, then they left.

– Anonymous

Location: Laxmi Nagar, near Jagat Ram Park, Delhi

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I have been harassed yet again in the previous week.

1) I had just been to bingo (had a good night for a change) and decided to nip into the shop on my way back to Grans’. I saw there were no gangs hanging around outside the shop so seized my chance.

So much for thinking I wouldn’t get harassed though…

Just as I was paying for my items, I heard four young boys behind me talking about me. One said, “You fancy her?” “Ewww!” “Why would you fancy her?” along with snickering. I knew they were referring to me because there wasn’t any other women nearby. As I walked out, I snapped at them to get some respect but the damage was already done. I was upset for the rest of the night.

2) The day after being insulted by those boys, I was ‘complimented’ but in a very lecherous way. I had just got out of my mothers car and a middle aged man walking infront of me turned around and said, “Alright love?” I replied “Yes thanks” then he responded by saying “You look very sexy tonight,” whilst staring at my legs. He also had a child with him. Luckily my Grans house was just a few metres away.

3) The same girls who have insulted me on numerous occasions yelled at me again yesterday. I had just had an arguement with my Gran so I wasn’t in any mood to be harassed. I was walking up to my boyfriends house when I saw them walking the opposite way. I was just about to cross the road when one of them yelled, “You’re so funny to look at” and both laughed.

At this point I completely lost my temper. I shouted back at them to fuck off and called the one who insulted me a bitch. They just carried on laughing and gave me the finger. I really did not need this shit at that moment.

I have been experiencing a lot of personal problems recently. I am battling depression and lately it has been getting worse. On top of all my problems I get harassed. I do absolutely nothing to provoke it. I just happen to be a victim.

Last night I felt so overwhelmed that I self harmed. I know it wasn’t the right thing to do but I feel there is no other way to express my self. I am dealing with a lot of things in my life right now and I really don’t need this extra problem. I fear that one day I’m just going to snap and hurt the person who harasses me. Then I’m going to be charged for assault.

– Clarice

Location: North Cornelly, Wales

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