• About Us
    • What Is Street Harassment?
    • Why Stopping Street Harassment Matters
    • Meet the Team
      • Board of Directors
      • Past Board Members
    • In The Media
  • Our Work
    • National Street Harassment Hotline
    • International Anti-Street Harassment Week
    • Blog Correspondents
      • Past SSH Correspondents
    • Safe Public Spaces Mentoring Program
    • Publications
    • National Studies
    • Campaigns against Companies
    • Washington, D.C. Activism
  • Our Books
  • Donate
  • Store

Stop Street Harassment

Making Public Spaces Safe and Welcoming

  • Facebook
  • Instagram
  • Pinterest
  • Tumblr
  • Twitter
  • YouTube
  • Home
  • Blog
    • Harassment Stories
    • Blog Correspondents
    • Street Respect Stories
  • Help & Advice
    • National Street Harassment Hotline
    • Dealing With Harassers
      • Assertive Responses
      • Reporting Harassers
      • Bystander Responses
      • Creative Responses
    • What to Do Before or After Harassment
    • Street Harassment and the Law
  • Resources
    • Definitions
    • Statistics
    • Articles & Books
    • Anti-Harassment Groups & Campaigns
    • Male Allies
      • Educating Boys & Men
      • How to Talk to Women
      • Bystander Tips
    • Video Clips
    • Images & Flyers
  • Take Community Action
  • Contact

“He just couldn’t believe he hadn’t gotten away with it”

June 9, 2011 By HKearl

This is cross-posted from Kate Spencer’s Tumblr. She’s a Sr. Editor at VH1 where she writes for TheFabLife.com and VH1.com.

“I’m writing this on the R train as it rattles slowly along toward Brooklyn. I’m headed to pick up my 6-month-old daughter. I’m writing because I’m still reeling from what occurred on the Times Square subway platform a few moments ago. I was walking to the end of the station as I always do. I saw a man, a stout, balding, nondescript looking troll, staring at me as I walked toward him. I watched as he slowly extended his arm and fingers, in particular his pinky finger, so it would make contact with me as I walked by. I’m wearing a skirt. It all happened quickly, in seconds, as these things always do, and sure enough as I passed him his hand jutted out and stroked my thigh. Without thinking I turned around and hit him as hard as I possibly could. I didn’t even stop walking, nor did I say anything. I did turn around to look at him as I hit him, and his face was one of shock but not of surprise. He knew why I had hit him; he just couldn’t believe he hadn’t gotten away with it.

Ive been sexually harassed so many times since my adolescence that I’ve lost count, but I’ve never reacted like that before. Normally I think, process, choose my words. There was no brain power that went into the decision to smack this asshole; it was pure instinct. As I headed away from him I immediately regretted not verbalizing my anger and yelling at him too, but I imagine that choice was instinctive as well. Besides, I think he got the message.

I am not someone who condones violence. But I’m so tired of my safety and personal space being invaded over and over again. I am a 32-year-old woman. I am a mother. I am not someone you can fondle without my consent because you feel like it, nor is any other girl or woman. Not my friends. Not my daughter.

When I’ve explained sexual harassment to men in the past I’ve been struck at their confusion over why it is a big deal. How is someone whistling at you threatening, they ask? Here is what they don’t understand. Those moments, which may seem insignificant and small, create an unsafe environment in which women are forced to live. Last month, after I yelled at some men in a car who made kissing noises at me, I was terrified to then walk down a quiet downtown street out of fear that they’d circle around in their car and hurt me. These moments force us to operate in a state of fear. They define who is in control and who can have their control taken away. And I’m so fucking tired of it that I’m starting to snap. I’m now hitting people. Because as much as I want to believe my daughter will not have to live with this same fear 10, 20, 30 years from now, I know that she will. And nothing makes me more sick to my stomach.”

Here is her follow-up post:

“I have no idea how this happened, but the post I wrote about hitting the man who sexually harassed me on the subway tonight has somehow ended up with 2500+ notes on Tumblr. I’m completely floored by the emails, messages and comments of support you people are sending. Thank you. And to all of you who are responding with your own stories, I thank you for sharing. It is clear we are not alone. Don’t be afraid to fight back.

I’ve gotten some questions about what happened and I will do my best to respond, but one I did want to answer was if this kind of thing happens a lot in New York. This kind of thing happens a lot EVERYWHERE. This is not a New York problem, it is a human problem, a societal problem. Most of my interactions with the people of this city have been nothing short of amazing in the ten years that I’ve lived here.”

(Thanks to my sister, a New Yorker, for the heads up.)

Share

Filed Under: Stories, street harassment Tagged With: fighting back, Kate Spencer, sexual assault, street harassment, VH1

I’ve Got Your Back Campaign

June 9, 2011 By HKearl

Hollaback is working to launch an important bystander campaign called “I’ve Got Your Back.”

It’s important because we need more bystanders taking action to prevent and stop street harassment. Too often when street harassment occurs, there are plenty of people who see it but don’t do anything. It can feel like an added slap in the face to the person facing harassment and it sets a societal message that the harassing behavior is okay. Also, often the person facing harassment may feel too unsafe to stand up to the harasser, but if s/he knew bystanders would help, s/he may feel safer and more empowered.

The proposed campaign has three parts:

1. In collaboration with the Green Dot Campaign, when bystanders submit stories, there will be green dots to signify those stories.

2. Click on the “we’ve got your back” button (just like you click on a facebook “like” button) and at the end of the day the person who was harassed will get an email saying that hundreds people have their back.  And they will know they aren’t alone.

3.  In partnership with Nancy Schwartzman, director of The Line, they’ll create a short documentary that profiles a young man who tries to stand up for his friends when they are harassed. With the Hollabacks in Buenos Aires, Mumbia, Atlanta they’ll develop interactive workshops to go with it.

Consider donating to Hollaback to help make the campaign happen.

 

Share

Filed Under: Resources, street harassment Tagged With: bystander campaign, hollaback, i've got your back, Nicola Briggs, sexual violence, street harassment

Street Harassment Film Nominated for Best Documentary

June 8, 2011 By HKearl

I just got word from Tiye Rose Hood that her documentary Objectified received a nomination for best documentary in Academy of Art’s 2011 Epidemic Film Festival in San Francisco. Congratulations, Tiye!

For those of you who’ve seen the documentary before via this site or another, this is an updated version of the film and the version entered in the Film Festival.

Objectified. from Tiye Rose Hood on Vimeo.

Share

Filed Under: street harassment Tagged With: Academy of Art, documentary, Epidemic Film Festival, objectified, san francisco, street harassment, Tiye Rose Hood

“Then my inner Scrappy-Doo took over”

June 8, 2011 By HKearl

In North County Times, Louise Esola wrote about a recent street harassment experience and what she ended up doing. Here’s an excerpt:

“It happens a lot to women.

Hey baby. What’s your name? Looking good there.

The latest incident sort of threw me sideways.

There I was, pushing a double stroller the size of a Ford Explorer, when a man in a local landscaping truck decided that, despite the cluster of kids riding their bikes in the street and the fact that it is recommended that those driving vehicles watch the road ahead of them, that it would be perfectly acceptable to whistle at me, wave his hand, and watch me.

Creepy.

…

When I got home from my walk, I found myself rethinking my route. My outfit. (I guess I shouldn’t wear shorts this summer.) My neighborhood. (Maybe I should just stick to my treadmill?)

And then my inner Scrappy-Doo took over. I got angry, looked up the landscaping company, phoned the manager and gave him a very firm and educational earful.

The manager was very understanding and called me back to tell me that he didn’t want to fire the individual —- “The guy needs the money” — but that he gave him a hefty “talking-to.”

Am I satisfied? Yes, because I have just succeeded in educating one more person: a lesson that this behavior is not OK.”

Good for you, Louise! None of us should be made to feel unsafe and objectified just for walking down the street. I think reporting harassers to employers, when applicable, is one of the most effective ways to respond to the problem.

For inspiration, here are a few more stories about people reporting their harassers, plus general info about reporting harassers to the police, transportation authorities, and businesses.

Share

Filed Under: Stories, street harassment Tagged With: landscaping, louise esola, north county times, street harassment

Anti-Harassment Petition: Please Mend the Gap

June 7, 2011 By HKearl

Harassment on public transportation is rampant. In Delhi, India, it’s no different. To address the harassment, many governments around the world have instituted women-only subway cars and buses (usually only during rush hour and without offering them often enough or in enough volume for all women to use them). The Delhi metro system is one example. The segregation is not working, however, and the harassment is as bad as ever. The Please Mend the Gap campaign is trying to change that.

Via an online petition site the organizers write:

“We believe that a majority of women do not feel safe while travelling in the Delhi Metro. We have spoken to a cross-section of Metro commuters who have shared with us their experiences most of which include instances of verbal and physical harassment mostly faced by women, specifically in the women’s-only compartment.

In fact, a few days ago, some of the members of our group who were traveling at night observed that the women’s-only compartment was populated with men who had occupied almost all the seats forcing the women to stand, leaving them with no choice but to actively demand the seats they were entitled to. The men were unapologetic and dismissive. Most shrugged off the women’s protest by claiming falsely that the women’s-only compartment turns general post 9 p.m..

Women who choose to travel in the general compartment are also harassed. There have been many instances where men have told women that they are not welcome in this compartment and should use the compartment reserved for them. This attitude has become so deeply entrenched in commuters’ mindsets that most accidentally refer to the general compartment as the ‘men’s compartment’. There have been times when authorities have driven out men from the women’s-only compartments, but without having imposed any fine whatsoever.”

Already, Please Mend the Gap activists spearheaded a flash mob on the metro to raise awareness about the issue. On June 1, they launched a petition with 10 demands for the transportation authorities to fulfill in order to make the system safer, and harassment free. The petition reads:

We the commuters on the Delhi Metro have the following suggestions to make to ensure a safer, friendlier and more respectable environment for women within the Metro premises.

1. Ensure regular announcement inside the Metro train and within the Metro stations stating categorically that, “Any person involved in, assisting in, or indulging in any activity that outrages a woman’s modesty, including but not limited to molesting and eve-teasing, will be punished with imprisonment and/or fine. The announcement should clearly state the Section 354 of the Indian Penal Code under which sexual harassment is a punishable crime.

2. Announcements like, “Men entering the women’s compartment will be fined Rs. 250,” should be made at regular intervals on the public announcement systems. Spot fines should be collected by DMRC Staff posted at the Metro Stations from men caught travelling in the women’s compartment.

3. Adequate training should be given to DMRC staff and CISF personnel stationed at platforms in handling of such cases with specific focus to sensitize the DMRC staff to handle victims with greater care and concern.

4. Every Metro Station should have at least one lady officer who is specially trained and equipped to handle such cases including registration of such offences, counseling the victim and the like.

5. The current system where one has to go to Kashmere Gate to file a FIR for cases related to the metro needs to be decentralized urgently. Every metro station should have a complaint cell conveniently and prominently located within the premises of the metro station and should be able to handle/register cases for the entire duration for which the metro runs daily, i.e. between 6 a.m. to 12 a.m. A system should also be evolved whereby the metro helpdesk/officials assist the victim in registering any case successfully.

6. Information Boards should be installed at every Metro station at strategic locations, such as near the ticketing counter, with detailed directions for lodging a complaint against an instance of harassment as well as emergency contact numbers of Delhi Metro officials, laws against molestation and other necessary information.

7. CCTVs must be installed inside the Metro compartments and information on how to procure CCTV footage, if and when required, should be made available to commuters at the earliest.

8. A section of the advertisement space available inside the Metro should be compulsorily reserved for displaying information relating to the legal assistance available to victims of molestation and harassment and remedies for the same.

9. The DMRC ought to provide details of helpline numbers and contact numbers/email addresses of important Metro authorities in the Metro Map Brochure and also inside the Metro train so that commuters are aware of the same and can contact the required persons in times of emergency. It has been brought to our notice by various commuters that some of the numbers are not functional. It is the prerogative of the authorities to ensure the helpline numbers are functional and are consistently monitored for efficiency and efficacy.

10. The DMRC ought to monitor, review and increase security arrangements and make authorities more accountable for lapses in security. It is our earnest request that our above demands be heard and implemented by the concerned authorities at the earliest. This will go a long way in ensuring that women feel safe commuting by the Delhi Metro and in fulfilling the DMRC’s mission of providing world-class service to the citizens of Delhi. This petition is drafted and supported by ‘PLEASE MEND THE GAP’, a citizen- led initiative to promote gender equality and commuter safety in public spaces.

Sign the petition and join their Facebook page for more updates on their campaign.

Share

Filed Under: News stories, public harassment, street harassment Tagged With: delhi, please mend the gap, public harassment, street harassment, transportation

« Previous Page
Next Page »

Share Your Story

Share your street harassment story for the blog. Donate Now

From the Blog

  • #MeToo 2024 Study Released Today
  • Join International Anti-Street Harassment Week 2022
  • Giving Tuesday – Fund the Hotline
  • Thank You – International Anti-Street Harassment Week 2021
  • Share Your Story – Safecity and Catcalls Collaboration

Buy the Book

  • Contact
  • Events
  • Join Us
  • Donate
  • Facebook
  • Instagram
  • Pinterest
  • Tumblr
  • Twitter
  • YouTube

Copyright © 2026 Stop Street Harassment · Website Design by Sarah Marie Lacy