Stop Street Harassment

Making Public Spaces Safe and Welcoming

Support anti-street harassment efforts this holiday season

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Lately, I’ve been inundated with e-mails and letters from every organization I donated to during their year + their best friend organizations, asking me to donate again. As much as I obviously care about most of those organizations if I’ve already donated to them, my end of year giving is going to two organizations that do anti-street harassment-related work, RightRides and RAINN. You may be interested in donating to them, too.

  • Right Rides for Women’s Safety: For more than six years RightRides has been giving free rides home to women and male members of the LGBQT community on Friday and Saturday nights in New York City. This free service is particularly helpful to people who cannot afford a cab and are reliant on buses and subways and feel unsafe waiting for or taking these late at night. RightRides has a page about the many ways you can become involved. A new feature is recurring gifts. $10/month can cover rides home for 12 people that year and $25/month covers about 30 people’s rides home. Any amount helps.
  • RAINN (Rape, Abuse & Incest National Network): Individuals across the United States can seek immediate assistance and advice if they or someone they know are survivors of rape and sexual violence via RAINN’s national phone hotline and online chat feature. While most people know their attacker, about 25 percent do not, and many of those cases are strangers in public places who harass and attack them. When too often survivors of sexual violence are blamed for it and thus are silenced and don’t know what to do, RAINN’s services are very important. RAINN also works on prevention legislation and programming. If you donate by Dec. 31, your donation will be matched dollar for dollar, so you can make double the impact.

Here are additional suggestions for organizations whose work makes public places – and the world in general – safer for women and girls. Not only could you do end-of-year giving to them, but you could make a gift out of donating in honor of family members and friends who care about ending and/or are impacted by street harassment.

  • Blank Noise – Support work in India to raise awareness about and end eve teasing/street harassment through performance art and online activism
  • Defend Yourself – Support the work of a Washington, DC organization that holds community workshops and classes that teach skills to stop harassment, abuse and assault. They particularly focus on girls, women, and LGBQT folks.
  • Girls for Gender Equity – Support a NYC organization that empowers teenage girls and has tackled street harassment through surveys, documentaries, conferences, and books
  • Helping Our Teen Girls – Help fund the programs of an Atlanta, GA, organization that empowers teenage girls and has tackled street harassment through workshops and music.
  • Hollaback – Support the NYC-based organization so they can  fund new Hollaback websites around the world
  • The Line – Help fund programs to raise awareness of healthy sexual boundaries, important work that can help prevent street harassment and sexual assault.
  • Men Can Stop Rape – Support rape prevention programming in middle and high schools and colleges that focuses on providing boys with a safe place to talk about masculinity issues and learn healthy definitions of manhood.
  • The White Ribbon Campaign – Support an international organization that works to educate young men and boys about gender equity, respect and healthy relationships.
  • Women for Women International – Help fund programming that helps women in war-torn areas gain skills and resources necessary to rebuild their lives and increase their safety in their community. You can also sponsor an individual woman as a sister.

And are you looking for other last-minute gift ideas? I can suggest a few:

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Christmas shopping trip ruined

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I had a horrible experience yesterday.

It happened on the bus when i was on my way to my local seaside town to do some xmas shopping. This ordeal left me shaken and in tears, though they were silent tears as i didn’t want other people to notice.

So when i sat on the bus, there was a middle aged man sitting two seats behind me talking on his phone. He was having a discussion about a woman who had rejected him that day. The way he was talking about her was disgusting. I turned around and looked at him. Then when he got off his phone, i heard a, “What are you looking at, you cow?”

I was shocked and said, “Nothing”.

But he proceeded to abuse me by calling me names and then he started making advances to me!

I obviously rejected him and told him that he can’t go around talking to people like that. This made him angrier and he continued his foul mouthed tirade at me, saying i am frigid and dopey.

In the end, he got off before me. I told the bus driver and he took me seriously but i decided not to go to the police.

– Clarice

Location: No 63 bus, Wales, UK

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Groped & harassed, but victim-blaming keeps her silent

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I am a school student. In my area there is a 99 percent chance that you get groped on crowded buses…so i often go to school by cycle…thinking that it was safe…..but i was wrong…. a guy on a scooter squeezed my breast with one hand and before i could react sped off..i was both physically hurt and psychologically disturbed…often people in our society blame the girl for being the victim…for not being careful…so i did not dare to share this with anyone..i hate sick men….most of the men in Chennai are sick.

– Anonymous

Location: Chennai, India

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“He asked me if I was into S&M”

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A year ago I went with my mother to visit Chicago for my birthday. It was a weekend trip and the only thing that I could put down as harassment was when we were on the train going from the airport to our hotel.

There were no seats left and I was standing by the doors holding onto one of the metal poles. There was a man across from me and at first he didn’t say anything until about fifteen to twenty minutes later when he made a comment about a necklace I was wearing. He asked me if I was into S&M. The necklace was a pair of handcuffs that I had bought at Claire’s, of all places.

I was a little bit put off but simply responded, “No, I just liked the necklace” Thankfully he didn’t say anything to me until he got off about ten minutes later.

Later when I told my mother about the experience she said to me that I had to at least expect some comments because of what the necklace was. I don’t agree and I thought that what that man had said to me was inappropriate.

– Anonymous

Location: Chicago, IL

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“Once again I was being singled out for being of the same race”

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Why is it that when I have a period when I don’t get harassed and don’t think about street harassment that it happens again?

I was walking home from work on the Key Bridge this evening, and was in my own zone, and I hear a voice yell “‘Scuse me…’scuse me!” and out of the corner of my eye I see it’s coming from a red SUV sitting in Key Bridge traffic that was at a standstill. Though I couldn’t see this guy’s face, I could tell by his voice he was a “brotha” and that once again I was being singled out for happening to be of the same race.

We were heading in opposite directions (I was walking towards Virginia and he was driving into DC) and I knew with my street harassment sixth sense he didn’t have anything important to say. I ignored him.

Then he starts asking, “Girl, are you cold? You cold, girl?” I continue towards my destination and continue to tune him out. I didn’t turn my head to look at him, and though I wasn’t afraid to confront him, I was not in the mood to say shit to him. I was tired, worn out and wanted to get home. I just kept walking. His response to my ignoring him was to laugh. What the hell did he think I was going to do, climb over the partition that separates the pedestrians from the drivers and talk to him?! Give me a break!

As I said, I was singled out by this guy because we’re both black. There were plenty of other people walking one way or another on that bridge. He said nothing to the two white women I’d passed in front of, one lugging rolling luggage and another cheerfully talking on her phone to her mother about her holiday plans. He didn’t say shit to a middle-aged couple walking in the opposite direction. He didn’t say anything to the men or the numerous cyclists. Nope, just me, all because we are the same race and I was solo and guys like him think single black women are prey. He’s bored while stuck in traffic and used me, a solo black woman, for a quick laugh.

From my many dealings with same-race harassment (some posted here, others not) it’s the same thing. If I say “I don’t know you!” or “Just because we’re the same race doesn’t mean you have permission to talk to me,” I get called “white-worshipper!”, “stuck up,” or told I think I’m “white.” If I tell them to go fuck themselves I get told “you’re ugly anyway.” I could’ve taken his photo like I normally do with harassers, but my phone takes useless photos at night. If I try to calmly educate them on why harassment’s not cool and specifically why they need to let single black women be, they act dense. “Why can’t I holla at a sista?” BECAUSE THIS SISTA DOESN’T WANT TO BE HOLLA’D AT!!!!! All said, I am tired of these men, not interested in standing out in the cold to dispatch yet another harasser, tired of the randomness of it all, and just wanted to get home.

Though this incident was minor compared to others, the reason why I’m so angry is because it’s yet another instance of me being harassed to add to my collection of harassment stories, and I’m sick of it.

– Tired of Being Harassed

Location: Key Bridge, Arlington, VA

Share your street harassment story today and help raise awareness about the problem. Find suggestions for what YOU can do about this human rights issue.

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