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I have many stories of harassment. I live in St. Louis and ride the bus and walk a lot. I now no longer feel safe to do so and am trying to move.

The other day, I walked to a nearby gas station to get some snacks, and a man behind me said in a low voice, “I can get you more candy.” I ignored him and checked out. As I was walking back, he drove his car with tinted windows by me and tried to say something to me. I ignored him. I usually have my phone, but didn’t that day. I felt very vulnerable. He drove away, then as I rounded the corner, he pulled up beside me to cut me off. I walked to the other side of the street saying to myself, “Oh no you don’t” and he followed me home. I acted like I didn’t live there and kept on walking until he drove away. Scary stuff.

There are countless times I am in the bus and a man asks, “Do you need a boyfriend?” I instantly feel angry. One time, as a man sat next to me and asked that, I looked him straight in the eye and said no and told him that I think men need to respect women out here on the streets. He looked so serious, said he could tell I was serious and that he had never heard a woman say that before. I told him maybe he could go tell other men.

The thing that makes me feel so uncomfortable is when you walk and a man says hi while staring at your crotch or chest. I have had men try to talk to me at the bus stop, the whole time, staring at my crotch. I ignored it, but next time, want to head on say, “Stop staring at my crotch.”

I just enrolled in a kickboxing/ self defense class. I am a thin woman and have a sensitive and kind personality. I feel like living with all of this harassment for over 10 years is turning me into a person I am not really because as I walk, I pretend I am talking on the phone, avoid eye contact, and look above people. It has affected my relationships with other males in that I find it hard to trust them. This is why I know I need to move out of this area because it has taken a toll on my mental health to constantly be ‘hard’, hypervigilant, and on the defense.

– J

Location: St Louis, MO- Arsenal and Gravois, Kingshighway and Delmar, Chippewa and Oregon

Need support? Call the toll-free National Street Harassment hotline: 855-897-5910

Share your street harassment story for the blog.
See the book 50 Stories about Stopping Street Harassers for ideas.

I was walking my dog in the park, just the usual timing, usual route. However, because there was ongoing construction nearby, it meant that there would be a lot of foreign workers there. (My country hires lots of foreign workers to construct buildings and stuff.) So anyways, I was turning back, ready to go home when suddenly a huge group of foreign workers appeared and started walking towards me. I had lots of bad experiences involving them before, but this time was different as they were in a huge group. Like 20 people. So I tried pretending to text and stuff. When they came nearer and nearer, I got more and more uncomfortable and afraid.

One of them dashed to the front of the group and started whistling loudly while the others just laughed behind. I continued walking. Unfortunately, my attempts of trying to ignore them were in vain as I still heard them speaking in their language and laughing as they walked past me. I didn’t look at them as I was really afraid they might do something to me. After they walked past, I felt really, really upset and disgusted. The feeling I felt made me sad, boil with rage, disgusted and suicidal even, all at the same time. I was on the verge of tears.

On my way back home, I was so angry I couldn’t help but plot revenge on them. Of course, I knew deep down I couldn’t do anything to stop them. I could only wait for the construction to be finished so they would leave the area. This wasn’t my first time getting cat-called. But I don’t feel comfortable keeping quiet this time. I am sitting on my balcony typing this when the feeling is still fresh. I really hope no one has to experience this heart-crushing feeling.

– E

Location: A park in Singapore

Need support? Call the toll-free National Street Harassment hotline: 855-897-5910

Share your street harassment story for the blog.
See the book 50 Stories about Stopping Street Harassers for ideas.

This incident happened about four years ago. I was living in South Philadelphia back then. I would ride the Broad Street subway to and from work. A few weeks prior to the incident, a young woman had been stabbed by some man on that same line that I rode because she ignored his advances.

I rode the subway everyday and rode home after work during peak hours. This meant full to capacity trains. I was starting to get nervous riding the subway alone, but I didn’t like to drive into the city, parking was expensive! After hearing the story of this young woman I bought a taser.

One night after work, I’m riding the train, usually I keep my headphones in. I had been harassed before and I just made it a habit to wear the headphones so maybe men wouldn’t approach me. I get off at my stop and begin walking home. It was about a ten minute walk. Not too bad. It wasn’t dark so I wasn’t too worried. It was summertime though, and in my neighborhood it seemed like groups of men just sat on their steps, got drunk and hollered at the passing women all day. I tried to always be careful, be aware of my surroundings, keep my music low enough to hear anyone approaching, cross the street just in case the group of men was too large.

Well this night, it was only about 6:30 p.m., I’m walking past these men. I just got off of work and I worked in an office so I had on slacks and a button up blouse. One man started whistling. The kind of whistling you do to call a dog. I was pissed. I wanted so badly to say something but there were about six of them so I keep going. He whistles again, maybe three times. When I get by him he blocks my path, so I tried to cross the street.

Upset that I didn’t react to his “advances”, he decides to grab my arm. He screams, “Yo Bitch, I’m talking to you!” I yank my arm away, but by this time he decides to grab the back of my neck. He whispers to me, “I got something for mean Bitches like you.”

His “crew” were all like man what are you doing? When he turns his head to respond to them, I dig my taser out of my bag, I always kept it within reach and tased him right in the chest. He let go and went down. I stood right there and called 911. Crazy thing was, when the cops got there, they took our statements but I got in trouble because the voltage on my taser was too high. Nothing was done to him, NOTHING! the officers just kept saying, “BUT YOU TASED HIM” I was so angry. It took me a long time to recover. I started driving to work after that.

Optional: What’s one way you think we can make public places safer for everyone?

Although, I got in trouble for mine, I would recommend a taser. Maybe research if they’re legal where you live first. I don’t want to think about what might have happened if he would have taken me inside the house that night. I’ll gladly take a ticket for defending my life, then who knows what….defend yourselves stand up for yourselves. Don’t let anyone get away with disrespecting you.

– SP

Location: South Philly, PA

Share your street harassment story for the blog.
See the book 50 Stories about Stopping Street Harassers for more idea.

I was home from graduate school. One afternoon I went out for a jog around the neighborhood where I grew up. I turned the corner and saw a young guy on a bike. “Whatever,” I thought and kept running. Bike guy saw me and decided to hop his bike onto the narrow sidewalk, coming towards me. I was forced to move out of his way as he sneered something derogatory at me. I think it’s over but I lapped the block (because I know exactly how many laps are a mile), and I saw and heard him again. And again. And again. One time, he even beckoned me to run alongside him. I ignored him, of course. The last time, he rode really close to me and said something extra nasty and disgusting again. Fortunately I didn’t see him again after that.

Did I mention that more than half of the block I run around is the location of an elementary school?!

Optional: What’s one way you think we can make public places safer for everyone?

Educate everyone, especially kids, about how it’s not appropriate to harrass other people – they aren’t there for your pleasure or appreciation, they just want to do what they have to do and move on, enjoying life and being safe!

– Anonymous

Location: Leahy School, Lawrence, MA

Share your street harassment story for the blog.
See the book 50 Stories about Stopping Street Harassers for more idea.