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Not expecting to have to be on the defensive

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I live in South Side Chicago, and I like to get my hair cut on the North Side. I take public transportation, so for me, this means taking the Green Line.

It was an early appointment and I had had a long day; I fell asleep on the way back. I’m woken up by someone hitting me on the knees. It’s some creep in glasses and a do-rag. “Regulations apply to everyone. No sleeping!” Groggily, I get up to see what stop we’re at. Still seven away from mine. I try to make polite conversation (I’m still in North Side mode). The creep is not only a jerk, but incomprehensible. I go sit down on the other side, because I am not in the mood for a fight.

He follows me, sits right across from me. He waits until I get off at my stop, and starts making obscene comments. I am tired and in no mood to fight, so I wait for him to pass and go home.

If I were more awake, I would have argued with him. As is, I’ve been hit with esprit d’escalier all day, and pretty mad at myself for not saying something. I punched a guy on the Beijing subway for groping me; I was just not expecting to have to be on the defensive here.

It happens all the time on the Southside; catcalls are the norm. And the worst part? It’s much, much worse if you’re a Black woman. I’m Asian; thankfully, this intimidates some of them. My roommate, however, is Black. Once this guy followed her for several blocks trying to get her number, even after she made it clear she wasn’t interested. She makes eye contact with a guy, he starts seriously harassing her. When we talk together past single men or men in groups, we know we’d better be in a very involved conversation.

Usually, police presence keeps the guys from bothering you too much, but that’s so rare around here. My roommate has given me one good mantra to keep in mind, though: “What makes them think they have the right to talk to ME?”

– Sandra

Location: Green Line Subway in Chicago

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"Catcalls nearing extinction" ?

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There are fewer catcalls from construction workers because more women complain about them and there are more women working in construction, according to the Miami Herald.

I don’t know about you but I haven’t been harassed by construction workers in years. I always get upset when I see them continued to be stereotyped in commercials, tv shows, and movies as the only street harassers because in my experience, it’s the random guys passing me in cars or standing on the street that harass! Men on public transportation are also a big pain, especially when they grope you or start masturbating in front of you. So reducing the ugliness of street harassment to a few whistles from construction workers trivializes something that is a big problem for a lot of women and does nothing to help educate people about its pervasiveness or the negative impact it can have on women’s lives.

What have been your experiences with construction workers? Have you reported them if you’ve been harassed? Do you think they still deserve to be stereotyped as harassers?

And, as always with articles condemning street harassment that allow people to leave comments, there are some real “gems” following this one. For example, these two:

“People that complain about catcalls are spoiling one of the few opportunities for a bad looking gal to raise their self steem [sic] and feel good about her looks. Gernerally, [sic] the complainers are people that want to express their disatisfaction [sic] with life, in other words they are sour and disgruntled.”

[like women really want to be judged “poor looking” and then get shouted at out of pity. thank you for your charity mr. god’s gift to women.]

“As American President of NACHOS, National Associaton of Catcalling Hardhatted Ogres, I demand our right of free speech. When women dress they way they do then get mad at the result its time to look at the real problem here.”

[poor man, the real problem appears to be that he has no control over his mouth and loves victim blaming]

Oiye oiye oiye … so much education is needed!!

Share

“Catcalls nearing extinction” ?

By

There are fewer catcalls from construction workers because more women complain about them and there are more women working in construction, according to the Miami Herald.

I don’t know about you but I haven’t been harassed by construction workers in years. I always get upset when I see them continued to be stereotyped in commercials, tv shows, and movies as the only street harassers because in my experience, it’s the random guys passing me in cars or standing on the street that harass! Men on public transportation are also a big pain, especially when they grope you or start masturbating in front of you. So reducing the ugliness of street harassment to a few whistles from construction workers trivializes something that is a big problem for a lot of women and does nothing to help educate people about its pervasiveness or the negative impact it can have on women’s lives.

What have been your experiences with construction workers? Have you reported them if you’ve been harassed? Do you think they still deserve to be stereotyped as harassers?

And, as always with articles condemning street harassment that allow people to leave comments, there are some real “gems” following this one. For example, these two:

“People that complain about catcalls are spoiling one of the few opportunities for a bad looking gal to raise their self steem [sic] and feel good about her looks. Gernerally, [sic] the complainers are people that want to express their disatisfaction [sic] with life, in other words they are sour and disgruntled.”

[like women really want to be judged “poor looking” and then get shouted at out of pity. thank you for your charity mr. god’s gift to women.]

“As American President of NACHOS, National Associaton of Catcalling Hardhatted Ogres, I demand our right of free speech. When women dress they way they do then get mad at the result its time to look at the real problem here.”

[poor man, the real problem appears to be that he has no control over his mouth and loves victim blaming]

Oiye oiye oiye … so much education is needed!!

Share