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Calling out #ShirtlessShamers

February 23, 2016 By HKearl

Our ally Lindsey of Cards Against Harassment wrote an excellent guest piece for The Daily Beast. Here are two excerpts:

“This January I started #ShirtlessShamers2016, a Twitter hashtag in which I juxtapose men’s sexist, slut-shaming social media posts about women’s bodily respectability with their own bare-chested pictures. This isn’t my first adventure in challenging misogyny through social media; you may also remember me from such other controversial positions as, “Street Harassment: Please Stop Doing It.” …

When I started using the #ShirtlessShamers2016 hashtag, I expected things to stay funny. Light. Playful. Sexism and gender-based double standards aren’t really funny, of course, but lampooning shirtless broskies who are heavy on ego and light on self-awareness has a certain silliness to it. They flex their pecs and regurgitate some casual misogyny, and we marvel, bemused, that they aren’t in on the joke.

But, as is often the case, we laugh to keep from crying.

I am about five weeks into the hashtag, with more than 100 posts (conveniently gathered here for your viewing pleasure) and the recurring themes are far from funny….

ShirtlessShamers

Unfortunately, this isn’t just a problem of young men being doofuses. The double standard is pervasive, and touches on the fundamental right for girls and women to be in their own bodies without being deemed provocative and inappropriate and at risk. That right matters. It matters for all women but especially for black women and girls, whose bodies are hypersexualized from very young ages. It matters for people like my sister, who has had strangers chastise her for breastfeeding her infant even as men jog half-naked nearby. It matters in how we continue to talk about street harassment as a problem related to clothing choices or other respectability proxies, no matter how many marketable white women go viral for reminding us street harassment happens to women in t-shirts and jeans.

This issue also matters for people like me who have survived sexual violence and routinely run into uninformed rape apologists and enablers who desperately want to prop up a myth that sexual violence is a problem contributed to by clothing or other victim choices. (It’s not.) It matters for people who have been bullied and shamed by their classmates and schools for the crime of developing parts unilaterally declared to be inappropriate or distracting. (They’re not.) It matters for people in the sex industry who are treated as if they shed their humanity when they shed their clothing. (They don’t.) The list goes on. Holding men and women’s bodies to a different standard as far as nudity and sexuality is concerned matters for everyone who has come to accept that no amount of fabric can fix an underlying culture problem.”

Thank you for all you do, Lindsey, to call out double standards and fight for women’s right to respect and dignity!

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Filed Under: News stories, online harassment, public harassment, Resources Tagged With: double standard, online harassment, shirtless, shirtlessshamers, slut shaming

Names that demean women

October 19, 2010 By Contributor

I haven’t had any experiences with harassment recently (which is a change) but i would like to share my thoughts with you about something that has bothered me since i was 16. This is about the sexual double standard. Now as im sure most of you are well aware of it, you must know exactly what i mean.

I am 19. So im still young and learning but i have definitely learnt that being a woman, i have had to deal with the fact that im going to be discriminated against because of my gender. There are three reasons why i have been called names, laughed at, critised, humiliated and objectified.

1) Because i am rather big busted. Actually i am an average size D cup, but others think different.

2) I can come across at times as being rather ‘hawty’. Also meaning ‘stuck up’.

3) The biggest reason of all, because im a WOMAN.

Now let me tell you that i have been called many different names BUT as im a female, i’ve been called these particular nasty names which i have taken more notice of. I feel these names demeans our gender and is what created the sexual double standard.

Bitch, prude, snob, slag, slut, tart and cunt.
I absolutely HATE these names.
I am called a bitch for standing up for myself.
I am called a prude if i rejected some jerks lewd advances.
I am called a slag because i wear a low top.
This makes me so mad!

If i was a man, i wouldn’t be called any of these names but because i have a vagina, i have been called these names countless flipping times!

Men have sneered at my breasts. I remember once a guy telling me that my ‘tits’ are so big, i’d crash a car! Well these ‘tits’ ( oh and they’ve always got to use the most crude language don’t they) are a very useful thing on a woman and once upon a time, your mother fed you milk from these wonderful things to keep you alive as a baby!

Some men are so damned foul mouthed. Exuse me ranting so much but i’ve just about had enough of it! I deserve to be treated with respect and not have to feel constantly nervous when i go out incase men stare at me, pass remarks or critise me. I should be able to wear what i want, be proud of my body and have every right to turn down a mans pathetic chat up lines!

Honestly, what makes them think asking a woman for a shag is so flattering?! It’s not, it’s rude! When are men ever going to learn that women are not here to be portrayed. We are human beings, not sex objects!

– Clarice

Location: Wales, UK

Share your street harassment story today and help raise awareness about the problem. Include your location and it will be added to the Street Harassment Map.

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Filed Under: Stories, street harassment Tagged With: double standard, sexist, sexual harassment, street harassment

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