Stop Street Harassment

Making Public Spaces Safe and Welcoming

Repeat motorbike groper in North Vietnam

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Today is the second time that a man on a motorbike has driven past me and grabbed my breast. The first time it happened I was so shocked that I didn’t have time to do much more than scream before he had disappeared from view. I spent many days after the first incident nervously checking my surroundings whenever I left the house and contemplating how I would catch this man if he dared tried do something similar.

Alas I now feel like a complete fool for not being able to prevent the same thing happening again just a few feet from my house. I am in an Asian country where people on motorbikes frequently wear scarves across their face to prevent inhaling fumes, so I was unable to recognize this person on sight and by the time I did, of course it was too late. I managed this time to swear at the cowardly, vile male responsible before he drove off, but given that he doesn’t speak my language, my guess is that he could care less.

I am comforted that other brave women here have experienced similar events but I can’t help worrying that this man’s actions could escalate into a more dangerous attack and I am not sure what steps to take next.

– Anonymous

Location: North Vietnam

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Groper in a Build-A-Bear Workshop

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Birmingham City Centre
Image from yourlocalweb.co.uk

I remember about two years ago, I was 13 and in town with a friend. We went into a Build-A-Bear Workshop so she could get a present for her friend. We were looking at the sounds you could put into your bear when a man walked past us. My friend turned to me and said, “That man just squeezed my butt.”

I couldn’t believe what i was hearing, i was so shocked. In the end we just blew it over and thought nothing of it. We then went into Adidas. We went upstairs and split up to look around for a bit. I went back down and i found her and she said it happened again!

I went back up with her because i wanted to see who this guy was. We couldn’t find him so we headed back down. As we were going down the stairs, she’s like, “that’s him.”

I looked over and he was staring at us. We headed out of the shop and i looked back and he was watching us walk away. We quickly headed into primark, to the back of the shop to lose him. We watched the door and saw him walk in. It was easy to spot him as we was wearing all black and had dark skin. He headed straight up the escalators to the next floor and it was then that i realized he must have been following us the whole day. He was carrying a SuperDrug bag. We had gone into that store after it had first happened.

We ran straight out of the shop and on the next bus home. We just took it as a joke at the time and laughed it over. She took it so well and at the time we were both shocked but neither her nor i seemed bothered.

But at the same time, i was so angry at her at the time for not saying anything to the guy, or anything at all just letting him get away with it, but now i’m angry at myself because i know i should of said something or done something, so i’m partly to blame.

This angers me a lot now because we where so young at the time and it’s just disgusting. In the past I have been a victim of disgusting comment or behaviour from both boys my age and older men, and i’m only 15! It really upsets me that this kind of behavior still happens! Why should i have to feel unsafe going out, having to watch out everywhere i go?

– Hannah

Location: Birmingham City Centre, England

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Groped & harassed, but victim-blaming keeps her silent

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I am a school student. In my area there is a 99 percent chance that you get groped on crowded buses…so i often go to school by cycle…thinking that it was safe…..but i was wrong…. a guy on a scooter squeezed my breast with one hand and before i could react sped off..i was both physically hurt and psychologically disturbed…often people in our society blame the girl for being the victim…for not being careful…so i did not dare to share this with anyone..i hate sick men….most of the men in Chennai are sick.

– Anonymous

Location: Chennai, India

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No 10-year-old should be violated like this

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This happened 6 years ago, but I haven’t forgotten it and just discovered this website so I thought I would share my story.

When I was ten years old, my fifth grade class (FIFTH GRADE) went to a play. When we were leaving the play we were standing around waiting for our bus near some adults. I didn’t see who it was, but I knew it was an adult because of the size of their hand, but someone grabbed my bottom, squeezed it, and then spanked it, hard enough for it to hurt for a while after.

At the time I was so surprised by it, but having experienced the things I’ve experienced now at 16 (having my butt rubbed, a man take a picture down my shirt, a guy shout, “I remember you from last night,” and too many more to list.  These are just the ones that have happened in the past week).

Every time I go out in public there are men leering at me, and whenever I go out without my parents they say what they are really thinking or follow me. It’s such an unpleasant experience.

It really helps to read other people’s stories. I am so amazed by the courage that so many women have shown in the face of these things, and although I haven’t had the guts to do anything about it, I hope that I will someday soon.I usually just ignore the comments/stares and walk away, or in the opposite direction depending on the severity of it. I don’t know what else to do!

– LB

Location: Northern California

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“I was crying too hard to drive”

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Today I was in my favorite chain of gas stations in town. They are always well lit, clean and have 5 attendants on the clock at all times.

I went to the ATM,and got out my money (hovering close to the screen to block the view) and walked to the counter. Some guy got into a spat with a woman behind him because she would not buy something he wanted, she said “Son, we don’t have the money for that” and turned to go get into the far line away from me.

As I walked this dirty looking guy walked up behind me, and stood in line. I only noticed him because he was watching me closely, and he was the guy that snapped at his apparent mother.

My first thought was he might think of taking my money he looked at me so intensely, so I tucked my purse under my arm and zipped it up.

As the clerk came to me and I started counting the money, I felt the guy behind me get very close to me, close enough to feel his breath on the back of my neck. He finally bumped my ass, and I could actually feel his hand through my slacks!

I turned around abruptly and screamed at him, “Do not touch me! I don’t know you! You have plenty of room to stand here, you do not have to be so close to me!”

He jumped back and started calling me names and saying, “That guy behind me pushed me.”

I yelled back, “I don’t fucking care you have no right to touch me, back up right now!”

He looked about my age (early 20’s). I looked around the store at this point everyone was staring like I was a crazy woman. I even saw his mother and she was looking at him like…I don’t know like she expected it? Kind of a “Oh my god not again.” I turned back around, because now I knew everyone was staring at him. He kept calling me names, under his breath and i finished paying for my money order, and left.

I was so humiliated! I even stood up for myself, but by the time I was out of the store and driving home I actually had to pull over in another gas station and have a panic attack there locked in my car because I was crying too hard to drive.

– BME

Location: Tulsa, OK

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