Stop Street Harassment

Making Public Spaces Safe and Welcoming

“Most of the time the men don’t say anything, they just try to touch me”

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I hate it!!! I thought it was only my problem because I always get told “take it as a compliment, he thinks you are pretty.”

I was harassed so many times. Mostly in tram or bus.

I am a very shy person, I never go to clubs or bars or suspect dark streets. I am not beautiful, I don’t wear sexy clothes, I only wear skirts in hot summer ( they cover my knees) and then I always get honked or yelled at out of cars.

But most of the time the men don’t say anything, they just try to touch me.

One day in tram I was sitting on a doubleseat and all the other doubleseats and most of the singleseats were free (there were only 3 people in the tram) a man came in and sat next to me on the other seat of my doubleseat. He came so close, he almost lay on my lap and leaned on me. I was stuck between him and the window. He read a big newspaper and every time he turned a page he tried to touch my breast. I was intimidated and wanted to cry and couldn’t move. On my station I asked him to let me out but he didn’t. So I had to climb over his lap/legs.

One day I was shopping and a guy followed me 45 minutes saying, “I love you… I love you… I love you…” I tried to ignore him and run through the stores but he didn’t disappear. It was getting dark and I was afraid to go home because I thought he’d follow me.

One day I was waiting in line. Behind me some boys (14 years old I think). They were laughing dirty at me and then they touched my ass. Everyone, one after the other. I told them to stop about 5 times. They kept on touching and laughing. I felt so helpless. They stopped when I kicked one of them in the balls.

One day while I was waiting for the bus a man tried to touch my breast getting his hand under my shirt!!!

One day I was in tram (of course) with my girls. The guy had his hand in his pocket and… Staring at us all the time. An older lady shouted at him but he didnt react he kept on staring at us and masturbating.

One day in tram (where else) a guy came and sat vis-a-vis. He tried to look into my eyes and I tried to look away. He wanted to force me to look into his eyes!!! Then he started to rub his legs on my legs. I was shocked and didn’t know what to do. I moved my legs from left to right from right to left to get away from his legs but his legs always followed.
When I told this story a (male) friend, he just said: “The guy probably thought, a pretty girl alone, looking sad (I am always looking a little pissed), maybe she doesn’t have a boyfriend.” So do I have to put a fake smile on my face to show pervert guys “I am happy and sexual supplied“?

And another guy said, “Some woman are looking so appealing that some man can’t hold back” I should understand it and maybe I was dressed to “slutty“ (even if I was, nobody has to touch me!!!). In this situation I was wearing jeans, sneakers and parka, it was cold outside!!!

One day (waiting for the tram – of course) a guy tried to touch me and I moved away from him. Then he stared at my legs, into my eyes, at my legs, into my eyes… licking his lips the whole time. What was he trying to say? He is a cannibal and wants to eat my legs???

Several other times when I was walking down the street and men tried to talk me into their cars.

Several other times men came to me saying “(wanna) fuck?” And when I got angry saying “it was just a question, you can answer with no, take it as a compliment.”

For about 15 years I have to deal with it. I hoped it stopped when I get older but it doesn’t.

When my 55 year old co-worker was waiting for the tram (of course) and no other people were around, a guy (20 years) stared at her. Then he said, “You are good looking. Do you want to sleep with me?” When she arrived at work she was still shocked and shaking.

I hate it soooo much. I dont know how to stop it!!!

Oh wait, I should take it as a compliment…

– Anonymous

Location: Germany

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“3 men approached me trying to touch my face and kept asking me to come with them”

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I’m a 16 year old girl, living in Brussels (parents moved from US to work here). I’ve recently stopped hanging out with my friends at the mall or the city shopping street, because of the looks, catcalling and remarks my friends and I get. My friends and I do not dress provocatively, but we do wear sun-dresses and shorts in summer, which we should be able to do, without being shouted at.

I really hate this behavior. A few weeks ago I was waiting for my friends outside a cinema (It hadn’t opened yet, I was 10 minutes early), It was 2 P.M, and around me were couples, groups of friends, families etc. Yet, 3 men still approached me trying to touch my face and kept asking me to come with them, and tried to pressure me into going into their car with them. I got so scared, I ran away and called my parents to pick me up.

Since that experience I don’t go anywhere without my mom or dad. This has really had a bad affect on me, I wish the sexual street harassment would stop. What is disgusting is when they do it to underage girls as well. I know 13 year old girls who are touched by strangers. It makes me sick.

Some people say it is flattering that men find them “hot”, but it makes me feel even more worthless and empty, as if the only reason I exist is to be looked at for being female.

– A.R.

Location: Brussels, Belgium

Share your street harassment story today and help raise awareness about the problem. Include your location and it will be added to the Street Harassment Map.

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Weekly Round Up: August 15, 2010

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Story Submissions Recap:

I accept street harassment submissions from anywhere in the world. Share your story!

In the News, On the Blogs:

Events:

Announcements:

10 Street Harassment Tweets from the Week:

Resource of the Week:

Men’s Anti-Violence Council

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Tokyo subway gropers organize online

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I’m conducting research for a street harassment article and I’ve gotten totally sidetracked by a story that escaped my attention last September.

As I’ve noted before, men groping women on the Tokyo subway system is a huge problem. There are even women-only cars to try to combat it. Well, last September Tokyo stepped it up a notch to hold “Groping Prevention Week” because men were organizing online and plotting out the best places to grope women!

Via MSN:

“The growing problem of groping on public transit has been exacerbated by the internet, as Japanese authorities have reported there are over a hundred websites in Japan designed for gropers — to swap information on the best train lines and travel times to cop a feel, and exchange stories and images of sneaky squeezes.

Guilty gropers face a fine of $6,000 and up to six months in prison, but it is believed that thousands of women keep uninvited train touches quiet due to modesty.”

Via Newser:

“Some gropers, encouraged by the websites, have been organizing into gangs to surround a victim while accomplices block the view of fellow passengers. Police warn that convicted gropers face up to 6 months in prison and a $6,000 fine. The crackdown—described as “groping prevention week”—snared its first groper within minutes: a 30-year-old man charged with grabbing a 15-year-old girl.”

Via Japan Today. High school girls help raise awareness about groping on the subway.

Via Japan Today:

“The Tokyo Metropolitan Police Department launched an anti-groping campaign on Monday, with some 200 people including high school girls handing out fliers and tissues at Ikebukuro station and plain-clothed officers being posted aboard trains on lines which run through Tokyo.

Police said that plain-clothed male and female officers trained in anti-pickpocketing and other crime-prevention measures would patrol carriages [and] they would beef up their uniformed presence at major stations nine lines…Police said the number of incidents is increasing, and there have already been nearly 1,000 reported cases of groping or photos being taken up skirts in the first half of this year.”

So gropers have figured out how to use the Internet and are using it to get organized? Hmm. It is a high tech country and look at Japanese games like RapeLay…I guess it was inevitable. Let’s hope the crackdown by police lasted longer than a week (can’t tell from my google searches) so more of these idiots are arrested and others are deterred.

And let’s hope that would-be-gropers in other countries don’t get any ideas about organizing. Although, maybe that would be better. If we found their sites and figured out their plots, it would make it easier to fight back and rally together protesters, police, and the media to shame and arrest them! Because that’s one of the worst things about street harassment (including groping), not knowing when or where it will happen and then being too shocked and paralyzed to do anything when it does. So please, harassers, if you’re going to grope, stalk, and harass us, at least let us know so we can be prepared to fight back.

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Flashers, masturbators, and gropers beware

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Guys who feel like masturbating, flashing, or groping people on the subway better think twice unless they want to get caught and charged with a crime. Thanks to cell phone cameras, it’s easier than ever for people to snap photos of perpetrators and report the crimes.

HollaBack NYC has long advocated for the use of cell phone pictures to shame harassers and report those who cross the line to criminal activity. In fact, the idea for the blog was born after a woman in NYC used her cell phone to snap a picture of a subway masturbator and report him.

[Update: If you’re in the Astoria area of NYC, look out for this alleged subway sexual assaulter and if you see him, contact the police. The woman snapped his picture and has reported him]

A few months ago in Washington, D.C., a photo of a metro station upskirter and groper posted on HollaBack DC! helped lead to his arrest.

Via CNN

And now in Boston, CNN reports that a MBTA rider’s cell phone picture posted on Twitter led to the arrest of a subway flasher.

“Rider Nay Khun was riding the train Wednesday afternoon when he spotted the suspect ‘fidgeting with his crotch area with his zipper open and his penis exposed,’ according to the MBTA.

Khun immediately posted to his Twitter account a photo of the man, saying ‘pervert on the 2nd car of the red line … help me report him.’

The man is a known offender, MBTA police told CNN affiliate WHDH.

He was arrested Friday for open and gross lewdness, according to a statement from MBTA police.”

Nice work Khun and a big thank you to the Boston transit authority and police for taking this issue seriously.

No matter where you live, if you can, take pictures of harassers and post them online. If they grope, stalk, threaten, or masturbate at you, report them! Let’s use technology to our advantage and put these creeps on notice. They should know there will be consequences for their actions.

(Thanks Violet Kittappa, Director of Research and Development for Hollaback NYC, for the CNN story tip)

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