Stop Street Harassment

Making Public Spaces Safe and Welcoming

More than 45 minutes of stalking

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I was walking down the street in downtown Toronto, and a guy in front of me walking in the opposite direction stopped to oogle me and seemed to mouth something like “Wow” (I was wearing my headphones and walking very quickly, so I ignored it.) After 10 minutes of walking, I reached a bookstore and used their facilities on the second floor. Immediately after leaving the restroom, the same man who I encountered 10 minutes ago was outside and blocked my path, saying, “Wow, what’s your background?”

I got out of his way and said, “I have to go. Bye” (I’m usually not this polite, but I was just taken a back by his creepiness/stalking).

I spent another 20 minutes downtown, browsing in various stores, etc. Then I walked another 10 minutes to a nearby mall. I spent about 10 minutes in one store, I tried something on, then I purchased it. Then, as I was exiting that store, who do you think I found right outside? Creepy stalker guy.

I try to bolt away, he proceeds to run after me, trying to hand me his number. I yell to him, “NO! F*** OFF!” He then backs off. I walk home, but am paranoid that this creep may be following me still and find out where I live.

Oh yeah, and someone else harassed me on my way back home.

– anonymous

Location: downtown Toronto

Share your street harassment story today and help raise awareness about the problem. Include your location and it will be added to the Street Harassment Map.

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Three London Harassment Recollections

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#1: Bus stop on Tottenham Court Road near The Astoria, approx 3 a.m.: I was standing waiting for the bus with my friend when a couple of guys came over and shouted at us, “I’ve never seen a white girl before, I want you to sit on my face!” and did gross hand actions related to oral sex. So disgusting and offensive!

#2: Elephant & castle, approx 9 p.m. : I was walking from the bus stop to my house and it was dark and i had to walk through this deserted area as the only way to get home. A man followed me off the bus into this area and was harassing me for my number, which i refused to give so I kept walking. He followed me but i didn’t feel i could go home because then he would see where i lived, so i walked this really roundabout route until i eventually lost him and could run home. When i got home i kept looking out the window to see if he was there 🙁

#3: Topshop, Oxford Circus, middle of day: I was shopping on the main floor in Topshop on my own, looking at the jewelry when i felt this man sort of thrust into me from behind. Because it was so busy i thought he must just have been jostled and bumped into me by mistake, so i overlooked the fact he had also put his hands on my hips when he did it. So i walked away to another area and a few minutes later it happened again. So I decided to walk around topshop in the most erratic pattern ever to see if he was really following me and sure enough everywhere i went he was there lurking a few feet away. He must have ‘bumped’ me about 3 times at which point i just left. I didn’t feel I could even tell the security guard because i didn’t think they would believe me so i just left feeling really gross and somewhat confused. At the time i was still quite young & immature and didn’t know how to react – just sort of felt embarrassed and thought perhaps i was mistaken. If it happened now, I would turn around and start screaming in his face.

– anonymous

Location: London, UK

Share your street harassment story today and help raise awareness about the problem. Include your location and it will be added to the Street Harassment Map.

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Weekly Round Up Feb. 21, 2010

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Stories:

I accept street harassment submissions from anywhere in the world.
Share your story!

  • On this blog, a woman talks about how early street harassment began and how she cranks up her ipod when she passes a regular harasser in her neighborhood, and a woman in Seattle, WA, shares the gamut of harassment she’s experienced.
  • On DC Hollaback! a harasser tells the contributor that she could “at least say hi.”
  • On Hollaback NYC a woman shares how she cannot leave her house in the Bronx without being harassed and another woman shares how a few years ago a man raped her and then she faced victim blaming from the cops.

In the News:

Announcements:

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A stalker murders in FL

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Alissa Blanton, image via AOL News

This story is about sexual harassment, stalking, and the utter failure of society to protect women. A young woman in Florida was murdered by a man who had been stalking her for two years. She was denied a protector order from him just a week earlier. As someone who has been a victim of street harassment and sexual harassment numerous times, this news story just broke my heart.

– Gabrielle

Via AOL News:

“A central Florida woman was shot and killed in her workplace by a stalker just one week after a judge denied her request for an emergency order of protection against the man, authorities said…

In a request for an order of protection, Alissa Blanton said Troy had been stalking her for the past two years. The two first met when she worked as a waitress at a Hooters restaurant in Merritt Island, Fla. Troy, a Cocoa Beach, Fla., businessman and regular customer, allegedly began harassing her on a regular basis. She said she turned down his requests for her phone number but eventually relented and provided him with her e-mail address…

The alleged harassment continued. In 2008, Blanton, in desperation, quit her job just to get away from Troy. That failed to end her torment, she said…

Despite Blanton’s 72-page petition, Brevard County Circuit Judge John Dean Moxley was not convinced that the situation was dire. Last week, he denied her request for emergency protection. Following the shooting, Moxley told the Orlando Sentinel he had not been able to determine whether Troy’s actions met the legal definition of stalking…”

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75 percent of women have been followed by a stranger

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January is National Stalking Awareness Month. 3.4 million people over age 18 are stalked each year – a huge number! Most people are stalked by someone they know and about 10 percent are stalked by a stranger. One form of street harassment is being followed by a stranger, but being followed once by a person does not seem to characterize stalking, otherwise I think the stranger stalking statistic would be much higher.

In fall 2008, when I informally surveyed over 900 people in 45 states and 23 countries about their experiences in public spaces, 75 percent of the 811 women said they had been followed by an unknown person at least once. Anecdotally, I’ve received numerous story submissions for this blog from women who had a strange man follow them.

Being stalked or being followed once by someone can be characterized as romantic or flattering to the target, mainly if they are of the opposite sex. Both behaviors are not. In one of my survey questions where people could say how different behaviors they were the target of made them feel, most women said being followed made them fearful. Being followed was second only to being assaulted for how much it upset them. My scariest experiences have been when unknown men have followed me, too. You don’t know what they want or what they intend to do.

Have you been stalked? Followed once by a stranger? What happened? How did it make you feel?

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