Making Public Spaces Safe and Welcoming
I work as a domestic violence and sexual assault counselor, which includes working at our agency’s emergency shelter. I get harassed more often than not just on my way from my car to the front door, be it by the creeps that hang around next to our building or some jerk hollering at me from his car.
– anonymous
Location: New London, CT
Share your street harassment story today and help raise awareness about the problem. Include your location and it will be added to the Street Harassment Map.
Since moving from Edmonton to Vancouver, I am astounded by how polite strangers are here. I have been here almost a year and have only experienced street harassment twice, both very mild incidents. Often, I will be walking down the street and I’ll see a group of young men approach. I will feel wary, because I’m used to harassment from groups of young men. As they pass me on the street, one of them will say ‘hi’ and then they keep walking.
Before I moved here, I had become desensitized to street harassment. I had given up on telling people about my weekly, often daily, experiences with harassment, because they’d always make it sound like my fault. “What were you wearing?” “What did you expect to happen?” “You’re so flirtatious, of course they felt they could say that to you.” “Why were you walking alone after dark?”
When I moved here, I experienced for the first time since puberty, how nice it is to walk around alone in public with nobody bothering me. That was when I started to feel really angry about street harassment. Every woman deserves to be respected in public and we should never settle for anything less.
– Margaret
Location: Vancouver, BC, Canada
Share your street harassment story today and help raise awareness about the problem. Include your location and it will be added to the Street Harassment Map.
A block from home, I’m alone on a corner, reading a book, waiting for the light to change and some douche tries to strike up a conversation with me. He asks me what I’m doing. It’s an awkward question, and he’s obviously leering at me and trying to get my attention. I answer as shortly and politely as possible and go back to reading. Nothing in my speech or body language says “Talk to me!” but none the less he continues to try.
“I was just asking cause you looked so pretty reading.”
Did I ask for your opinion? Does my business casual outfit make me look like a hooker or something? Seriously dude, WTF?
All I could think to say was “Sorry” as I turned towards home, but in retrospect I wish I’d told him to fuck off.
Feeling flustered, uncomfortable, and slightly violated, I finally got home, locked all the doors, and made sure my roommates were home. I felt gross for the rest of the day. I just wanted to finish my goddamn book, ass hole.
– anonymous
Location: Redmond, WA
Share your street harassment story today and help raise awareness about the problem. Include your location and it will be added to the Street Harassment Map.
I have had to deal with harassment of all sorts ranging from leers to unwanted touching ever since I was a teenager and now at age 31 that has not changed. I used to have to take public transit and I was an intern at the hospital…I had to change my route from the hospital to the bus station due to this autoshop on the street where a bunch of guys would holler and say all sorts of rude and degrading things to me as I walked by. I can’t walk anywhere without having a car honk at me and some loser hanging out the passenger side asking me for my number. One memorable experience was when a guy asked me if I was married. When I replied in the affirmative he went on to ask me if I was married to a white or a black man. When I didn’t answer he said “Must be a white man…want some chocolate milk on the side?”
I even had one guy come and grab me roughly on the arm, demanding my name as I was getting into the car when my husband was picking me up! The nerve!
Recently I ran across that game that has been making the rounds at http://www.heybabygame.com and the feedback I have been seeing especially from the majority of males is very predictable. “Oh noes, how dare we find a woman attractive and compliment her!”
There is a difference between nice polite compliments and outright leering and making a woman uncomfortable. A big difference. It is a thin line to be sure, and too many men cross it.
It is about time that guys learn that this type of stuff is NOT okay. It is not welcome, it is not flattering. It is uncomfortable, degrading, and in many cases downright scary.
Thank you for this website.
– Tracy
Location: Albany, GA
Share your street harassment story today and help raise awareness about the problem. Include your location and it will be added to the Street Harassment Map.
Tonight while walking home in my quiet well-lit neighborhood, a man on a bike grabbed my ass. As it was a narrow sidewalk and he had to squeeze past me, it took a minute to realize what had happened. He grabbed my ass! There was no doubt it had been intentional — he turned around and grinned at me. Twice. The entire time I was so surprised that all I could do was glare.
Even now I’m not sure what I should have done. Yelled at him? Made a scene? Ignored him?
– anonymous
Location: Washington, DC
Share your street harassment story today and help raise awareness about the problem. Include your location and it will be added to the Street Harassment Map.