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He tried to grab my arm
You don’t have to be walking on the street or use public transportation to be harassed it can also happen in the perceived safety of your car. I realized this the other day when I was waiting at an intersection that is on a service road that runs alongside the freeway. The on ramp isn’t that far from where my residential street ends and people will frequently sit there for minutes at a time trying to turn across three lanes of traffic to get to the on ramp lane at 7am in Houston. In the amount of time that they’re waiting to do this, they could have just turned right and gone through the light to the next ramp. After waiting for three minutes (because some people really are that obnoxious) I honked at the guy in front of me. He looks into his rear view mirror and immediately goes into action. (Mind you, if I had been a guy he wouldn’t have done what he did next.) He gets out of his car with an enraged expression and holds his arms out a s if to say, “What bitch?” I responded, because my windows were already down and I have no AC. “I’m in a two-ton vehicle and you look threatening. What am I going to do?”
I have another incident that really bothered me. It wasn’t necessarily on the street but it was still public harassment. I’m an introvert (read: quiet and introspective but not shy) and I can usually get away with sticking my nose in a book if I want to be left alone. I was out because I like doing karaoke, and I usually read between my songs. My usual tactic of trying to shut people out by reading wasn’t working this time because some asshat sat down next to me and eventually got to the point I knew was coming. He invited me to go home with him and I told him no numerous times. Finally, in order to escape him, I had to move a few seats down. When I was called up for my next song, he tried to grab my arm and I moved out of his reach. I found out later he had been harassing someone else too. I told the establishment about it and they kicked him out thankfully.
– Anonymous
Location: Houston, TX
Share your street harassment story today and help raise awareness about the problem. Include your location and it will be added to the Street Harassment Map.
Weekly Round Up April 18, 2010
Stories:
I accept street harassment submissions from anywhere in the world. Share your story!
- On this blog, a woman declares she is not “walking sex” and decries street harassment, a man chased a woman on the subway platform in Hollywood, CA, a man treated a woman waiting at a bus stop in Dublin as if she were a prostitute, a woman shares her views on street harassment and declares no woman deserves such behavior, a Japanese man dry humped a woman on a train in Japan, a man yells at a woman in DC about her dog, a taxi driver and man on the street harassed another woman in the DC area, a man in Boston harassed a woman as she was getting ready to ride her bicycle, and a 13 year old girl in the UK says how upset she is that men harass her all the time.
- On HollaBackNYC a guy harassed a woman from his SUV,
- On HollaBack DC! a woman shares how HollaBack DC! helped her feel empowered to fight back against a street harasser, another sees a crotch grabber on the metro, and a man treats a woman like a dog with the way he whistled at her.
In the News:
- What does eve-teasing have to do with clothes?
- NYC Tracks reports on the rise in subway harassment.
Announcements:
- HollaBack NYC is looking for summer interns
- April is Sexual Assault Awareness Month. Here are 10 activism ideas for how you can raise awareness about this widespread problem and/or help raise funds for preventative programs and resources for survivors.
- Take two street harassment surveys and help researchers studying this problem.
- The submission deadline for an anthology on Queering Sexual Violence is extended until May 1, 2010.
- If you’re interested in becoming a RightRides driving team volunteer, email volunteer@rightrides.org – orientations will be occurring throughout April.
Events:
- If you’re in DC, attend Speak Up, Speak Out! on April 29.
- Sign up for Washington, DC, based Defend Yourself’s annual class on dealing with street harassers, being held on May 22.
Resource of the Week:
- The recently updated harassment map
“Give us a look”
I’m just 13 and from the UK and I’m sick of harassment too! I have large boobs which aren’t my fault, what do men expect me to do chop them off?! I should not be persistently harassed because of them.
Just yesterday me and my friend were walking up her street, there were two boys/men of between 20-25 in front of us. Suddenly one of them turned round, looked me directly in the eyes and wolf whistled. I, being used to this sort of thing ignored it but I could tell my friend was a little shocked. We walked passed them and then I heard the boy singing “Get your tits out, get your tits out. You’ve got big boobs you’ve got big boobs, give us a look” again and again. By this point me and my friend were a little scared and holding hands and to top it off there was another group of about 5 boys of about 15 ahead who kept looking. Suddenly the first boy ran ahead of us and screamed “I want you, how old are you? I want you” and my friend told him to please leave us alone. He wouldn’t so we began to practically run down the street, thankfully the boys ahead turned around and asked if we were ok and told us to walk ahead of them they “had our backs” but really we found the whole experience terrifying. If those boys hadn’t been there I dread to think what would have happened!
I don’t want to put up with this for the rest of my life. When will men learn it’s not cool, or funny? It’s demeaning and scary and HAS TO END!!!!
– Isadora
Location: UK
Share your street harassment story today and help raise awareness about the problem. Include your location and it will be added to the Street Harassment Map.
What has eve-teasing got to do with clothes?
The Indian Express has a good article featuring Blank Noise‘s efforts to raise awareness in India about the problem of street harassment by collecting clothing women were wearing while being harassed. Here’s an excerpt:
“We are told that the onus lies on us to prevent its occurrence. We are told to dress appropriately, to come back home on time, to not attract attention to ourselves. And the worst of all, we are expected to accept sexual harassment or forms of eve-teasing as a part and parcel of our societal culture,” says Mariya Salim, a Calcutta University student of human rights who is participating in the drive.
Besides acting as testimonies of eve-teasing all voluntarily donated garments exhibited at public places in Kolkata since last month, also serve as a sort of an outlet for the victims to purge their pent-up feelings.
Jasmeen Patheja, founder member of ‘Blank Noise’, a Bangalore-based volunteer led community arts collective, says it is a violation of a girl’s liberty when she has to think twice before going out of her house alone.
“Isn’t the perpetrator responsible for his own action irrespective of what time we go out on the roads wearing the kind of attire we want to,” she said.
Very true. Women who are harassed are not to blame, the men who harass them are! Learn more about the work Blank Noise is doing.
