Today, I was walking home from my campus when I had to pass the usual street that leads to my house. There has been a construction site on that street for around three months, and I have been catcalled several times by the workers on that site. This time one when I passed, one of them said “Hey” and looked at me with the most disgusting lecherous look ever. I decided I have had enough so I confronted them and asked, “Why did you call me??”

He looked confused, and then he said “No”. Then I asked louder “Why did you call me???”

He looked at his friend and then said “No” again. After that I walked away feeling happy and relieved because I just confronted my bully.

Optional: What’s one way you think we can make public places safer for everyone?

Raising awareness by doing campaigns to let men know that: No, we are NOT flattered.

– FD

Location: Near a construction site

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I am so damn sick of this happening to me. Today while outside I experienced getting harassed twice and each and every time that it has happened I have tried to ignore it and even stand up to it, but I have then realized that there is no use in me even wasting my time or breath to try and make these guys understand how small, degraded, disrespected and angry I feel.

They seem to get this sick and twisted perverted pleasure out of it and I’m tired of being ignored and humored and I am tired of people turning a blind eye to it. The sad part is when I try and stand up for myself, I am the one who is punished. I’m the one who has to suffer and pay for it. I didn’t ask for this. I try to come outside and leave the house for some fresh air but I can’t go anywhere in peace without being bothered. I am mainly experiencing this everyday. I don’t know nor understand this and why me? Do I have some type of stamp on my forehead?

Location: One incident occurred outside my local library. The other was while I was coming out of the bank.

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Biking from school (art school is open till late) at 22.00, it was raining cats and dogs. Since I didn’t got a raincoat, I could feel the water running down my skin into my shoes. In an attempt not to get to grumpy, I started to sing. Almost home, I needed to enter several tunnels and here there was a man looking for some shelter. Being polite, I smiled and immediately I regreted my kindness.

He started shouting at me, HE WET PUSSY! and so on. The harder I biked away, more demented his voice became. Not sure if he even ran after me for a bit. It made me so angry, aggressive even, but I was definitely no match for him. I said something like: Let it be!

It was like oil on a campfire. As if my response gives him all reason and meaning to what he did and he shouted even more. Luckily I could escape this time. But I do fear the next encounter, since this is the second time seeing him.

What can I do? Change course? That feels like surrender and takes me even longer through the dark. Same way to night/next week?

I’m scared he’ll rape me. I feel ashamed for my kindness and guilty that I put myself in danger after being raped before. Despair for not having control over my own safety, where people say its a save country and where I should be grateful for my rights. Right? To hell with that!!! All this, because it rained…

Zula

Location: Netherlands

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Today someone catcalled to me for the first time in my life. I am 15 and my friends who were with me are also in high school in a small town in New England. We are on the cross country team and were out in the middle of a run. We were at a crosswalk waiting for all the cars around us at the intersection to have a red light so we could cross. The lane nearest to us was already stopped. A man pulled his car up and rolled down the windows. He looked about 25-30 years old, nearly twice my age. He yelled “Hey, beautiful girls,” in what he seemed to think was a sexy voice.

I looked to my friends to see if they knew this man and they looked just as bewildered as I did. He kept talking, “No answer? Come on pretty babies come see me. I have some beautiful healthy genetics! Wanna see?” I glared at this man, full of hatred. Finally the light turned green and he repeated, “Beautiful healthy genetics!” as he laughed.

I found it so disgusting and offensive, and never would have expected it in the middle of the day in a small New England town. Afterwards I immediately and deeply regretted not looking at his license plate so I could report him.

Now I want to know, is there anything we can do to stop catcallers?

Optional: What’s one way you think we can make public places safer for everyone?

Make catcalling illegal.

– Anonymous

Location: Massachusetts

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The bus was overly crowded. I was pushed up against other people and I had trouble staying upright. My arm was already aching from holding onto the overhead bar for dear life, trying to keep myself from falling on top of the people in front of me, a group of men sitting on a long-ish seating facing the back. I noticed them looking at me, but I decided it’d be best to ignore them.

I was with a male friend and I was excited because we were going to watch a movie. Our stop arrived and I scrambled to squeeze out, as did the men sitting in front of me. Just as I’d reached the exit, one of the men came up behind me and grabbed my butt. I was disgusted and whirled around to yell at him, but the crowd was already pushing me out.

I got off scowling and muttering curses under my breath, unable to see which one of the men had grabbed me through the crowd thronging around the bus, desperate to get on. My friend asked me what was wrong but I knew he would start a fight if I told him so I kept quiet. However I couldn’t quite shake off that feeling that’s all too familiar to anyone who’s had their personal space violated. I was walking along, still fuming, so my friend kept asking me why I was so mad. I told him and he asked why I hadn’t told him right then and there. I explained to him I didn’t want him to start a fight, to which he replied, “Then stop being angry. It’s no use being mad over it now”.

I tried to explain how I couldn’t just shrug it off like it was nothing. I could still feel his hand on me, and I felt helpless and violated. I kept trying to explain it to my friend, but he refused to listen and we just ended up fighting. Needless to say, my night was ruined, just for a fleeting moment of satisfaction for one lecherous fellow passenger.

– S.T.

Location: Nepal

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