Stop Street Harassment

Making Public Spaces Safe and Welcoming

“I was crying too hard to drive”

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Today I was in my favorite chain of gas stations in town. They are always well lit, clean and have 5 attendants on the clock at all times.

I went to the ATM,and got out my money (hovering close to the screen to block the view) and walked to the counter. Some guy got into a spat with a woman behind him because she would not buy something he wanted, she said “Son, we don’t have the money for that” and turned to go get into the far line away from me.

As I walked this dirty looking guy walked up behind me, and stood in line. I only noticed him because he was watching me closely, and he was the guy that snapped at his apparent mother.

My first thought was he might think of taking my money he looked at me so intensely, so I tucked my purse under my arm and zipped it up.

As the clerk came to me and I started counting the money, I felt the guy behind me get very close to me, close enough to feel his breath on the back of my neck. He finally bumped my ass, and I could actually feel his hand through my slacks!

I turned around abruptly and screamed at him, “Do not touch me! I don’t know you! You have plenty of room to stand here, you do not have to be so close to me!”

He jumped back and started calling me names and saying, “That guy behind me pushed me.”

I yelled back, “I don’t fucking care you have no right to touch me, back up right now!”

He looked about my age (early 20’s). I looked around the store at this point everyone was staring like I was a crazy woman. I even saw his mother and she was looking at him like…I don’t know like she expected it? Kind of a “Oh my god not again.” I turned back around, because now I knew everyone was staring at him. He kept calling me names, under his breath and i finished paying for my money order, and left.

I was so humiliated! I even stood up for myself, but by the time I was out of the store and driving home I actually had to pull over in another gas station and have a panic attack there locked in my car because I was crying too hard to drive.

– BME

Location: Tulsa, OK

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“You are delicious”

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I always, I mean always witnessed men saying, “You are delicious”, “I want to lick you pussy”, with me and my sister, and every female. A few times I was touched, so was my sister.

– KS

Location: City: Goiania, State: Goias, Country: Brazil

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Unsafe in downtown Cleveland

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The other night, I went out for drinks with a couple of friends in downtown Cleveland. As we were walking back to our car, a man starts shouting out a car window that he likes one of our asses. He goes on and on and then finally yells as the they turn the corner, “I will not eat your pussy if you do not suck my cock.” I was worried they were going to drive the same way we were walking, but thankfully they turned the other way. I was worried they were going to stop.

– Anonymous

Location: Cleveland, OH

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“Most of the time the men don’t say anything, they just try to touch me”

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I hate it!!! I thought it was only my problem because I always get told “take it as a compliment, he thinks you are pretty.”

I was harassed so many times. Mostly in tram or bus.

I am a very shy person, I never go to clubs or bars or suspect dark streets. I am not beautiful, I don’t wear sexy clothes, I only wear skirts in hot summer ( they cover my knees) and then I always get honked or yelled at out of cars.

But most of the time the men don’t say anything, they just try to touch me.

One day in tram I was sitting on a doubleseat and all the other doubleseats and most of the singleseats were free (there were only 3 people in the tram) a man came in and sat next to me on the other seat of my doubleseat. He came so close, he almost lay on my lap and leaned on me. I was stuck between him and the window. He read a big newspaper and every time he turned a page he tried to touch my breast. I was intimidated and wanted to cry and couldn’t move. On my station I asked him to let me out but he didn’t. So I had to climb over his lap/legs.

One day I was shopping and a guy followed me 45 minutes saying, “I love you… I love you… I love you…” I tried to ignore him and run through the stores but he didn’t disappear. It was getting dark and I was afraid to go home because I thought he’d follow me.

One day I was waiting in line. Behind me some boys (14 years old I think). They were laughing dirty at me and then they touched my ass. Everyone, one after the other. I told them to stop about 5 times. They kept on touching and laughing. I felt so helpless. They stopped when I kicked one of them in the balls.

One day while I was waiting for the bus a man tried to touch my breast getting his hand under my shirt!!!

One day I was in tram (of course) with my girls. The guy had his hand in his pocket and… Staring at us all the time. An older lady shouted at him but he didnt react he kept on staring at us and masturbating.

One day in tram (where else) a guy came and sat vis-a-vis. He tried to look into my eyes and I tried to look away. He wanted to force me to look into his eyes!!! Then he started to rub his legs on my legs. I was shocked and didn’t know what to do. I moved my legs from left to right from right to left to get away from his legs but his legs always followed.
When I told this story a (male) friend, he just said: “The guy probably thought, a pretty girl alone, looking sad (I am always looking a little pissed), maybe she doesn’t have a boyfriend.” So do I have to put a fake smile on my face to show pervert guys “I am happy and sexual supplied“?

And another guy said, “Some woman are looking so appealing that some man can’t hold back” I should understand it and maybe I was dressed to “slutty“ (even if I was, nobody has to touch me!!!). In this situation I was wearing jeans, sneakers and parka, it was cold outside!!!

One day (waiting for the tram – of course) a guy tried to touch me and I moved away from him. Then he stared at my legs, into my eyes, at my legs, into my eyes… licking his lips the whole time. What was he trying to say? He is a cannibal and wants to eat my legs???

Several other times when I was walking down the street and men tried to talk me into their cars.

Several other times men came to me saying “(wanna) fuck?” And when I got angry saying “it was just a question, you can answer with no, take it as a compliment.”

For about 15 years I have to deal with it. I hoped it stopped when I get older but it doesn’t.

When my 55 year old co-worker was waiting for the tram (of course) and no other people were around, a guy (20 years) stared at her. Then he said, “You are good looking. Do you want to sleep with me?” When she arrived at work she was still shocked and shaking.

I hate it soooo much. I dont know how to stop it!!!

Oh wait, I should take it as a compliment…

– Anonymous

Location: Germany

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Police officer harasser in New Orleans

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I thought I had seen just about every form of harassment until Monday night/ early Tuesday morning. I had posted an incident on this site this past summer. The cop that I had given the benefit of the doubt to, thinking maybe he just didn’t witness me being attacked, ended up being the worst harasser I have ever come across.

I came across him for the 3rd time two nights ago. I was on Bourbon street debating on whether or not I should go to work. I stopped at my one strip club which was empty. I spent time talking to the DJ and Doorman. Then I headed towards another club to see if anyone was there. Again it was dead. As I was turning around a group of people (both men and women) called me over. We got into a conversation. They were tourist so I gave them my usual advice – go to Frenchmen Street or any where but Bourbon. I was mid sentence talking to another girl when the Cop in a golf cart pulls up. He calls me over and tells me I have to get off of Bourbon Street.

WTF? I actually did a double take.

This time I knew I didn’t do anything wrong. Once before he had kicked me off the PUBLIC street because I didn’t have an ID (I again excused his behavior, “maybe he didn’t think I was 21” I reasoned). When I informed him that it was my right to be on the street especially, since I live and work there. He suggested I was a hooker. I was furious but kept my cool. I had to buy stripper shoes and I told him as much. He followed me to the shoe store in his little golf cart. His hostility actually scared me. I just knew that my challenging his authority was going to end badly.

I stopped back at my one club and told the doorman about the Cop. I was really mad but, also freaked out. I didn’t want him to follow me all the way down Bourbon where it gets more deserted and where I live. I asked if I could wait in the club until the Cop turned around and passed by again so I could walk home without the hassle. I had no such luck!

I was waiting at the bar in my club and the next thing I know the Cop is pushing past the door guy, bouncers and manager, demanding that I step outside. I went without a fuss and asked what I was in trouble for. The answer: prostitution. Mostly though he was pissed I didn’t get off of Bourbon St. I’m sorry I didn’t want to walk 10 blocks on a deserted street. On a weekend when streets are packed I avoid Bourbon like the plague – not on a Monday when things are dead. I try to stay safe.

Even worse, talking to other women I discovered this is the Cop’s MO – He kicks young women, some strippers some not, off of Bourbon Street on the pretense that we are all prostitutes. If you are not with a male he has no problem banishing you to a darkened side street. I felt like I walked into another dimension when I got arrested. I still prefer the day I spent in jail to risking my safety. I want to face him in court and prove that I’m innocent and he is a sexist bully unfit for NOPD.

– Megan Kelley

Location: New Orleans, LA

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