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Calvin Klein and the glamourisation of sexual harassment

May 14, 2016 By Contributor

Cross-posted with permission from SallyOReilly.com.

OffensiveCalvinKleinAd-May2016
“Upskirt” shot Calvin Klein ad

You’ve probably already heard about the new Calvin Klein advertising campaign. It’s worked, that’s for sure, in that Twitter and Facebook can’t get enough of complaining about it. And of course the pro-sexism and creepy factions can’t get enough of defending it and lashing out at people who recognise it for what it is – blatant sexist glamourisation of and dismissal of sexual harassment.

It’s so depressingly predictable. I almost didn’t write about it because I don’t want to give the advertisers my attention when I have better things to do right now – like eat lunch for example.

However, I’m incensed. I’ll be brief (that’s not a pun).

This new campaign features butt selfies, dodgy slogans, curiously vagina-like grapefruit and ‘upskirt’ shots of a girl who is not only not annoyed but is kind of, pleased looking. Because it’s flattering to have an upskirt shot taken right? At least that’s what they want us to think. They want us to think that women should be pleased to be objectified, and that being available in this way is what female sexuality is about. That this is erotica (yes ..they’ve actually officially called it “Erotica”). After all, women are the target market – right? (!!??)

“Eat_in #MyCalvins”

#RollsEyes

This shot, despite vast amounts of complaints (which I’m THRILLED about) is still live on their Instagram account as I type.

It is appalling, and utterly lacking in awareness and basic empathy, that womens’ experiences of sexual assaults and sexualisation are being normalised and packaged as ‘Erotica’ in this way.

Erotic for whom exactly? Well, I think we can answer that..

But that’s Calvin Klein for you. I don’t know if you’re aware of this but if you have a teenage daughter who has recently insisted that you buy her CK underwear there is a very real chance that on her Instagram there is now a shot of her in said underwear, possibly with some sideboob showing and a host of ‘likes’ from strangers, hashtagged #MyCalvins or #meandmycalvins.

This is grooming.

At ‘best’, teenaged girls are being trained to view themselves as sexual objects without desires of their own. At worst the brand is encouraging underaged girls to pose in ways that will attract sexual predators and who will grow up to believe that their function is to look and be sexually available and to be OK with , indeed to like with being viewed as such. How is that erotic for them?

And now, these predators can feel more OK about it, after all the ads have gone viral and teens themselves are hashtagging away, blissfully unaware of the sinister side of their online activities.

I’m concerned, very concerned.

Please engage your teenagers in a conversation about this when you get a chance and consider signing any online petitions you can find. While there is the irritating reality that we are giving CK more publicity here, there is a more positive reality too – people are beginning to see how very real the threat of advertising is to the self esteem and sexuality of our women and girls. And people power is a real thing.

Meanwhile – #NotBuyingIt.

Sally O’Reilly is a psychologist, psychotherapist & clinical supervisor based in East Cork, Ireland. She holds the European Certificate of Psychotherapy from the EAP and is a graduate member of the Psychological Society of Ireland. Visit her websites and follow her on Twitter, @psychosal.

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Filed Under: offensive ads, Resources Tagged With: calvin klein, offensive ads, sexual harassment, teenager, upskirt

“There wasn’t a way for me to respond”

May 13, 2016 By Contributor

A guy about my age pulled up in a car and yelled, “Hey, faggot!”

I was carrying something at the time, so I couldn’t flip him off, and I didn’t want to respond verbally and engage. So I kept walking and turned onto a one-way street where he couldn’t follow. I felt frustrated and angry; there wasn’t a way for me to respond, and I couldn’t really talk to my friends about it. What do you say? “Some guy yelled at me from a car.”

There’s not a follow-up or a “poor you” that you’d get or anything; it feels like a “so?” kind of thing to say.

– GK

Location: Outskirts of Chicago, IL, while walking to a friend’s house.

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See the book 50 Stories about Stopping Street Harassers for more idea.

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Filed Under: Stories, street harassment

“Street harassment is scary and is my biggest fear when leaving the house”

May 8, 2016 By Contributor

I think it’s pretty sad how street harassment is something I’m used to at this point.

I love going on walks, they’re relaxing, but at the same time, I feel uncomfortable because of the amount of men staring at me every single time. And over half the time I walk around town, in the middle of the day, I experience cat calling, disgusting comments, whistles, and/or people honking at me. But there are some moments that stand out to me.

The first incident was in 7th grade. I was walking home from school, on the main road I always walked on. As I’m walking, a guy who looked around 20 years old turns the corner and is walking quite a distance in front of me. Pretty normal I guess, no need to be worried. But I found it a bit odd that he kept looking back at me, more than most people. Once I was getting kind of close to him, I crossed the street, and he also crossed. I’m pretty sure I crossed the same street 2 or 3 times and yet he still was crossing when I crossed. At this point I’m in front of him by a bit. I was freaked out, but luckily there was a crossing guard near waiting for the bus of another school to arrive. I thought that I would just wait there for a bit with the crossing guard, but even more luckily, my dad happened to be driving by and picked me up. I just think that this is so creepy. I was 12 and being followed by some guy quite a bit older than me. People shouldn’t have to deal with this whatsoever, especially when you’re just a kid.

And a more recent one: I was walking around town in the day. But I got this pink wig that I loved, so I decided to wear it on my walk. I got honked at twice, whistled at once, and was told to smile. That pissed me off. I just wanted to go on a walk feeling confident. And I wasn’t even wearing anything revealing. I was completely covered, it being the middle of winter. And when I was a few blocks away from my house, on a not so busy road, a guy stopped his vehicle. He was probably around 30 and asked me if I wanted a ride. That was f*cking terrifying to me. I replied with a no thanks. He asked me if I was sure and how far I needed to go. I told him not too far and that I was positive. He said okay then and drove off. I was 16 at the time, and a stranger approached me asking if I wanted to get in his car. I was scared and glad that he didn’t try to pressure me anymore. I bet you that if I was a guy, he wouldn’t have even stopped.

Street harassment is scary and is my biggest fear when leaving the house. By the way, I live in a town that doesn’t even have 20,000 people.

– Anonymous

Location: Town

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See the book 50 Stories about Stopping Street Harassers for more idea.

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Filed Under: Stories, street harassment Tagged With: middle school, young age

“Stop making racist and crude sexist remarks”

May 7, 2016 By Contributor

I was at the park with my dad and a (female) friend of ours. We were there doing Acro yoga and minding our own business when these three young guys came and got in the water. At first it was fine then I started hearing what they were saying. I am thirteen years old and they couldn’t have been two years older than me. They were calling each other n****** and were saying very crude sexist things. More than pissing me off it made me sad that they were raised in an environment where they found that they could get attention by doing things like that.

I ignored them as I didn’t want to give them the pleasure of gaining my attention. I felt like going over there and slapping or punching them but I refrained. I also felt like saying, “Hey assholes, stop making racist and crude sexist remarks before I call the police for harassment and they can tell you to stop,” but I refrained. Now I feel bad that I let them get away with it but I know that I did the right thing.

– Claire

Location: Round Rock, Texas

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See the book 50 Stories about Stopping Street Harassers for more idea.

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Filed Under: Stories, street harassment

“Not act like a perv”

May 6, 2016 By Contributor

One day I was just walking because it was a nice day so why not take a walk. I was in Arizona at the time and it’s usually pretty hot but not on this day. This guy drives up to me and asks me where was a certain place and I gave him directions because I’m a very nice person and I wasn’t just gonna say f**k off because I’m a very friendly person.

After I give him the directions he asks me for my number, what size my boobs are, and if I was interested in intercourse. I politely said no thank you and walked away. He continued to try to get my number but he eventually left. I felt sad, mad and angry because a real man shouldn’t be saying that to a woman and should respect her not act like a perv.

– Ashleigh Johnson

Location: Phoenix, AZ

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See the book 50 Stories about Stopping Street Harassers for more idea.

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Filed Under: Stories, street harassment

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