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“These particular occurrences stuck with me’

April 19, 2016 By Contributor

I have two distinct separate stories that stood out to me more than all the other incidents of harassment that I’ve dealt with.

The first one happened around the end of July of last year. I was walking to the shop on my dinner break from work whilst on my phone (literally tending to my own business) and this, I would say, 20 y/o guy in a car drove to a traffic light ignorantly playing his music way too loudly. I turned to look at the commotion briefly and then looked back at my phone. The next minute I heard the loudest wolf whistle at my direction (apart from a few maybe 10 y/o boys running past me and an old couple sat on a bench I was the only one there so I knew it was directed at me), I looked back at the guy with a blank expression, clearly with lack of interest and again tended to my own business.

The second story occurred quite recently. I was in Ibiza and stood in the terminal of an airport waiting to board my plane back to the UK and I was looking at nothing in particular when I glanced at this guy who was looking at me. I looked away thinking we had just awkwardly made eye contact and left it at that, five minutes later I caught the guy again, just looking me, and he made absolutely no effort to look away and he continued to just gawk at me for a good and heavy thirty to forty minutes or so. It just baffled me as to how, according to him, it was completely okay to just f*****g look at me up and down with a small grin, like as if he was enjoying it.

I know these stories aren’t that big of a deal compared to other bigger harassment incidents that happen, but these particular occurrences stuck with me more for whatever reason.

– Anonymous

Location: UK and Ibiza airport

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See the book 50 Stories about Stopping Street Harassers for more idea
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Filed Under: Stories, street harassment

Pervical Beer Company Jokes about Street Harassment

April 18, 2016 By Contributor

By Britni de la Cretaz

No matter how many times women and other marginalized folks make the point that street harassment isn’t a joke, it seems that advertisers aren’t getting the message. Last week, a new local brewing company out of Boston, Massachusetts, aired their very first TV spot. It ran during the Red Sox game and, unfortunately, it was problematic.

The commercial begins with a woman walking into a liquor store, the camera (and the store clerk’s eyes) lingering on her butt. She buys two six packs of Percival Beer Company’s beer and walks home, being subjected to catcalls like, “Hey, let me get some of that!” on her way. When she gets home, she tells her male partner that she’s never doing that again due to the harassment she received. The ad then cuts to her partner buying the same beer and facing the same catcalls on his walk home, presumably for a laugh.

When I tweeted at the company about the ad, they at first tried to explain away why the ad was OK, telling me that the “video also shows a man being catcalled.”

BritniPercivalBeer2

 

BritniPercivalBeer

But as I (and another Twitter user) pointed out to them, men and women being catcalled are not comparable.

The thing is, when a woman is catcalled by a man, there is a power differential that doesn’t exist when a man is harassed by that same man. When women are harassed by men on the street, we legitimately fear for our safety. Often times, that harassment escalates into physical violence. Even if the woman is being catcalled about the beer and not her body, the intentions don’t change the impact of those comments. For a woman walking through public space, we don’t recognize the difference. What we hear is unsolicited commentary directed our way from men we don’t know. And this isn’t a funny hypothetical for us; it’s a reality that women and other marginalized people face on a daily basis when they walk down the street.

So while we can laugh at the man being catcalled, that’s an indication of the male privilege (and homophobia)  inherent in that interaction. He has the privilege to be taken aback and walk on from the harassment because it’s not seen as threatening to him, whereas, even in the commercial, his female partner makes it clear that the same interactions made her feel unsafe.

To their credit, when faced with two women who were unhappy with their commercial, Pervical Beer Company responded that they are “still growing. Making mistakes but learning.” But these kinds of mistakes don’t need to happen. These kinds of mistakes happen when there are no women at the table to say, “Hey, this isn’t actually a good idea.” Mistakes like this are an indication that companies need to diversify their staff behind the scenes so that things like this don’t happen in the first place.

It’s even more disheartening that this ad is airing during Red Sox games, as the last people that need to have the idea that street harassment is a joke reinforced is the largely male audience that watches sporting events. Intentional or not, this commercial is harmful.

We need our advertisers to do better than this if we ever hope to end violence against marginalized folks in public space. So advertisers, the next time you think you want to make a joke about street harassment, I have some advice for you: don’t.

Britni de la Cretaz is a freelance writer, feminist parent, and Red Sox enthusiast living in Boston. She has been organizing against street harassment locally since 2011. Follow her on Twitter at @britnidlc.

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Filed Under: street harassment Tagged With: beer commercial, Boston, catcalling joke, offensive ad

“Come here gorgeous”

April 17, 2016 By Contributor

I was walking home from a friends house when I was about 13 and I was in my school uniform; shirt, trousers and blazer, when two middle-aged white men came up behind me and started talking about my arse. They started getting closer to me until they were right behind me and they were trying to touch me. Needless to say, at 13 I was terrified, having never dealt with this before, and not in an area where I was familiar, and so I started walking faster, turning every time I could, but they continued to follow me.

I then ran down the street and ended up knocking into a lady walking home with her shopping bags and asked her for directions back to my school so that I would know where I was going to get home. This made the men behind me drop back and eventually I got away from them.

I then arrived on the road opposite my school and as I was walking down (it was a dual carriage way) a man in a van started yelling at me from his window and leaning half of his body out of it, trying to grab at me saying, “Come here gorgeous”.

That was the first time I was ever harassed on the street, but from the age of 11, men I didn’t know catcalled me.

Optional: Do you have any suggestions for dealing with harassers and/or ending street harassment in general?

It depends on how you feel at the time. At first I was too scared to do anything and so I ran away, but when it was boys from my school doing it, I reported it to my head of year. The next time it happened on the street I kicked the man and ran away because he had his head in my boobs. After a while you get used to having to deal with it, but the best you can do is to report it to someone who can actually do something about it.

– SKA

Location: London, UK

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Filed Under: Stories, street harassment Tagged With: school uniform, teenager, UK

“College-aged men inside began shouting rudely”

April 17, 2016 By Contributor

Walking back from a church service with my friend an SUV had it’s windows rolled down and college-aged men inside began shouting rudely.

– Anonymous

Location: West Lane Avenue, Columbus Ohio, 43210

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See the book 50 Stories about Stopping Street Harassers for more idea
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Filed Under: Stories

Because I wore a skirt that day

April 15, 2016 By Contributor

Image gy
Image by Jill Santos

I still get a nervous feeling in the pit of my stomach at gas stations when I’m alone. I would pull over constantly months after the occurrence while driving, in fear I was being followed again. I stopped wearing dresses and skirts for a while, my favorite things to wear. I was blamed for what had happened to me…

A man watched me at a gas station. I paid no attention, pumped gas in my car, and left as quickly as possible. I thought I was being my usual worry-wart self when I sensed he was following me. Through stoplights, unexpected turns, and neighborhood streets all the way to my then college campus I could see that man in his car in my mirror still lingering behind. After calling 911 and luckily having a faculty member help me, he sped away. Once when recounting this experience, it was suggested to me that this occurred because I was wearing a skirt that day and that is why he followed me after spotting me at the gas station.

So when I am out running in jogging pants and a sweater, I am getting whistled at because of what I am wearing? When I am in the grocery store parking lot in winter clothes and a scarf and getting inappropriate comments yelled my way, it is because of what I am wearing? When friends and I are hollered at when walking in the dark, it is because of what we are wearing?

He harassed me that day because of a skirt?

Street harassment is a learned behavior. How can it be addressed when we are focusing on the victim instead of the harasser?

Street harassment continues its prevalence towards anyone, wearing anything, anywhere. I cannot count the number of times I have been catcalled in my 21 years and it is disgusting at how frequent this occurs to myself and those around me. Hearing “smile, beautiful” or a whistle or “it was a compliment” just makes me cringe. Street harassment has become a social norm among cultures where this behavior is considered tolerable. Victims are the ones left to alter their actions and behaviors expecting these interactions to occur.

Although I think back often to that experience any time I feel anxiety creeping up or may feel even the slightest hesitation leaving the house in a skirt, I know now that I was the victim. I know I am not alone in the world with people experiencing street harassment daily. It may be difficult to think about your experience, let alone write it for others to read- but someone who reads it could relate it to their own experience and think “there’s nothing I could have done to prevent it from happening, it wasn’t my fault, and it wasn’t because of the way I was dressed.” At least I try to remind myself that and sharing your story could remind others too.

Jill Santos is a 21-year-old college senior, a califoregon girl. Follow her on Instagram @jiillionaire

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Filed Under: anti-street harassment week, Stories, street harassment

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