• About Us
    • What Is Street Harassment?
    • Why Stopping Street Harassment Matters
    • Meet the Team
      • Board of Directors
      • Past Board Members
    • In The Media
  • Our Work
    • National Street Harassment Hotline
    • International Anti-Street Harassment Week
    • Blog Correspondents
      • Past SSH Correspondents
    • Safe Public Spaces Mentoring Program
    • Publications
    • National Studies
    • Campaigns against Companies
    • Washington, D.C. Activism
  • Our Books
  • Donate
  • Store

Stop Street Harassment

Making Public Spaces Safe and Welcoming

  • Facebook
  • Instagram
  • Pinterest
  • Tumblr
  • Twitter
  • YouTube
  • Home
  • Blog
    • Harassment Stories
    • Blog Correspondents
    • Street Respect Stories
  • Help & Advice
    • National Street Harassment Hotline
    • Dealing With Harassers
      • Assertive Responses
      • Reporting Harassers
      • Bystander Responses
      • Creative Responses
    • What to Do Before or After Harassment
    • Street Harassment and the Law
  • Resources
    • Definitions
    • Statistics
    • Articles & Books
    • Anti-Harassment Groups & Campaigns
    • Male Allies
      • Educating Boys & Men
      • How to Talk to Women
      • Bystander Tips
    • Video Clips
    • Images & Flyers
  • Take Community Action
  • Contact

Women Should Not Be Harassed at UK Clinics

April 15, 2016 By Contributor

Earlier this week, author and Everyday Sexism founder Laura Bates spoke at an Abortion Rights event in Parliament on protecting women from harassment and abuse at UK clinics. She gave me permission to share the speech here, as part of International Anti-Street Harassment Week:

UK parliamentLet’s be very clear –this is not a debate about abortion. That debate already takes place, vociferously, elsewhere, from our parliament to our media to our universities to our streets.

This is not about freedom to have a conversation that is already happening widely. This is about harassment. It is about the aggressive, intimidating, upsetting experience of women being harassed at the point of access to a wide variety of different healthcare services, including reproductive healthcare.

This is not about protest, which could take place anywhere, it is about bullying women, making them feel anxious, creating a hostile and unpleasant environment for both service users and healthcare workers.

This is not a debate about abortion.

Because anybody who wants to have a real impact on abortion recognises that place to do so effectively is not at the point of access, but in and outside parliament, where policy is debated, not outside clinics where women already have the legal right to access services and should be able to do so without fear, harassment and intimidation.

The impact on women at what may be a very vulnerable, private and personal time must not be underestimated. Harassment doesn’t have to include shouting, threats or abuse to be deeply impactful and upsetting. Simply being shown some of the extremely graphic and sometimes inaccurate images protesters often hold, being filmed against one’s wishes at this private time, or being made aware that somebody is actively praying against you can cause huge emotional turmoil and distress. When a United Nations Delegation on human rights visited an abortion clinic in Alabama and experienced anti-choice protesters outside, they described it as “a kind of terrorism”.

Writing about their experiences of clinic harassment on Twitter, women said:

It made me feel like I was taking the walk of shame

It made me feel sick

I’ve never seen anything like that in real life

The protesters scared me

One woman wrote:

I used to work at an abortion clinic. Now I’d be too scared.

There is no reasonable argument that such harassment is necessary or effective, because there can be no reasonable argument that any woman reaching the point of attending an appointment with an abortion provider hasn’t already heard the arguments against abortion – because we live in a society where these arguments are everywhere. No woman grows up thinking of her control over her own body as complete and unchallenged, because we do not live in a society where that notion goes without loud and vigorous debate, and indeed, because we live in a society where our sisters in Northern Ireland, for example, are still denied such basic rights.

In fact, women are forced to hear other peoples’ opinions about abortion throughout their lives, as these Everyday Sexism Project entries show:

“While in year 10 my science teacher felt it appropriate to share his views on how he believed abortion was too flexible and should not be allowed up to 24 weeks. After telling him that I believed that it should be allowed up to 24 weeks he looked at me in disgust and told me that ‘those’ women should not be allowed to have children at all.”

“A male colleague told me men should decide about abortion law and time limits because women are too emotional and have a personal bias which is why we have 24 weeks which he says is “really late” and puts too much focus on “what the woman herself wants”.”

“In my 1st year at University I remember a young man standing up and announcing: “I would never date a woman who has had an abortion, this is disgusting, these kind of women are damaged goods.”

“My husband said that a women should be able to decide to take her top off for men if she wants to that she should have control over her own body but that a woman should not be able to have an abortion because that is murder”

“I was watching a discussion of abortion on a political panel show. There was one woman who kept trying to speak up while the men around her loudly spoke against abortion. She even tried to start sentences like ‘well since this is an issue that particularly affects women…’ but the man next to her said ‘hold on a second, let me finish’. The show went to commercial and moved on to a new subject before she got to speak at all.”

Across society, the voices we hear least in debates about abortion are those of people who have actually had one. Women are shouted down in these conversations because a lot of these conversations are driven by thinly veiled misogyny. The sexist idea that bearing children is a woman’s sole purpose and responsibility. The patriarchal notion that society has a greater right to dictate what happens to a woman’s body than she does herself. The misogynistic idea that women’s lives are less important.

That’s why it is so vitally important that at the point when a woman is accessing the reproductive healthcare which is her legal right, she is, in that moment, at the very least, able to do so safely, without harassment, bullying, shaming or intimidation.

This is not a debate about abortion. It is about harassment, misogyny and bullying.

Share

Filed Under: anti-street harassment week, public harassment Tagged With: abortion, bullying, everyday sexism, harassment, laura bates, parliament, UK

Healing after Assault Abroad

April 14, 2016 By Contributor

This article is cross-posted from Wanderful with permission from the author for International Anti-Street Harassment Week.

Trigger Warning: Assault

As non-male travelers, we live uniquely gendered experiences. No matter where we are, women’s safety is an ever-relevant topic. Thanks to technology, we are more connected to information about traveling to different parts of the world.

From deciding to go to Israel to attending protests abroad, safety matters to all of us. But how do we prevent or avoid smaller, more targeted crimes, like assault or petty thefts?

I had never been assaulted until I came to Nicaragua, the safest country in Central America.

I have traveled to several different countries and put myself in much riskier situations, so I did not expect to be assaulted at knife point in the morning as I ran up the huge hill.

I was wearing headphones, as I do on my typical morning runs, but I had no electronics with me. I wear headphones to avoid catcalls, so men will think I can’t hear their sexual and lewd comments.

trail-660x440Image by Unsplash user Paul Jarvis.

My attacker pulled out a knife and felt through my pockets. He knocked me to the ground and kept searching them, hoping to walk away with an iPhone. Ten seconds later he realized I had nothing of material value on me. He walked away with nothing, and I was physically fine, but I had the emotional consequences to deal with.

As soon as I came home, I felt extremely unsafe. Instead of my post-run feeling of accomplishment, I was petrified. I didn’t know what to expect after an event like I had just experienced.

Still, I vowed not to let this experience stop me from living and exploring this beautiful country. Just as I didn’t expect to be assaulted in a country where I feel relatively safe, I didn’t expect to recover immediately.

I did realize the importance of taking steps to heal, so I learned what to do after an experience like mine.

Here are the steps I took to help me recover from the assault:

1. Report the crime.

After being assaulted, I immediately called my Peace Corps Security manager and reported the crime. The hardest part of it all was admitting what had happened. I have never said the words,

I was assaulted at knife point.

I described the attacker as much as I could, and after reporting the assault, it was easier to process what happened.

If you find yourself the victim of an assault, reporting the attack to the police is also a good option. Even if the assailant is never caught, reporting helps others become aware of safety issues.

2. Write about it.

As soon as I reported the crime, I wrote down exactly what happened, to further acknowledge it. Writing has always been a form of therapy for me. After a few days, I wrote a powerful letter to my attacker in order to quell the thoughts of what I should have or could have done.

I don’t really believe in the concept of full closure, but psychologically engaging my attacker in a final dialogue and forcing him to listen to me made me feel as if I was able to process everything that happened to me and to gain some form of closure.

3. Don’t do it alone.

As an introvert, I usually thrive on alone time, but not after an assault.

I immediately called my friends, who came right away to keep me company. I told them that I felt like I’d gone through a break-up, and they reassured me that I was feeling as if I’d broken up with my feeling of safety. They had undergone worse attacks than I had in their lives, and we talked about things that we wouldn’t have normally broached in conversation. I was so reassured because I wasn’t alone.

A few of the people who supported me did so from afar. I reached out immediately to a few people with connections to Wanderful for online articles and resources. One of those was Leanna. I felt comfortable reaching out to her because she had been assaulted and was not afraid to write about this personal issue so publicly. She inspired me to be open about healing and to let others know they are not alone.

Delia reminded me that, although I wasn’t physically harmed, this was a traumatic experience and that I am more than worthy of self-care.

4. Be okay with your recovery time.

The first day was the worst. I had an insane amount of flashbacks. My mind kept replaying every little thing that had happened and how I felt in those 10 eternal seconds of my attack. I didn’t know when the flashbacks would stop, but I decided to be okay with it. I was also okay with crying at random times because I knew it would pass. I knew I needed to give myself the time I needed to process what had happened.

5. Talk to a therapist.

After my assault, I spoke to a therapist every day for three days. She helped me to come to terms with what happened and to process it further. I don’t usually seek out therapy, but I knew I couldn’t do this alone and that I needed to have a better idea of what to expect. Calling a therapist is still awkward for me, but I know that it is worth it. I don’t enjoy appearing weak, but I know that the short-term discomfort of reaching out for help far outweighs feeling too ashamed to reach out in the first place.

My therapist let me know that my flashbacks were a normal, bodily response and that, with time, they would decrease.

If you can’t afford a therapist, there may be a therapist in your area that offers their services on a sliding-scale. There are also online therapy options and help that you can find in books.

6. Be vulnerable.

Avoid listening to social stigmas of feeling “ashamed” that this happened to you. It wasn’t easy for me to write a descriptive blog post about my experience. The hardest part was clicking “publish,” but it was worth it.

I broke the silence about assault. Friends and acquaintances reached out to me, offering words of solidarity and comfort. I reminded myself that vulnerability is not weakness. We fear being vulnerable because we fear rejection, but I have learned to push past this fear and embrace my vulnerability.

Hopefully, you will never need to heal yourself after an assault. But you may encounter a friend who could really benefit from your support. If you do need this list, know that what you experienced is not your fault. Repeat that a hundred times to yourself if you need to.

Further Resources:
Post-Harassment Self-Care by Autostraddle
Traveling Is Healing for Me, a story by male PTSD survivor C. David Moody
Traveling with PTSD Discussion Forum

Do you have any other advice for fellow travelers about recovering from an assault? Share them in the comments.

Char Stoever was born in Mexico and grew up in Moses Lake, Washington. While at Wellesley College, she gravitated toward learning French and enjoyed being in language classrooms the most. After studying abroad and traveling in France, she realized how empowering it was to be a woman traveler. After graduating, she tutored at-risk high schoolers in San Antonio, Texas. She then taught at Brooke Charter School in Boston. In August 2014 she began her 27-month Peace Corps Nicaragua service as a TEFL Teacher Trainer. As the LGBTQ volunteer coordinator, she has led safe space trainings for Peace Corps Staff. She does social media marketing for the Peace Corps Nicaragua Gender and Development Committee,  and is an editor of Va Pué, the volunteer-run magazine. She also does social media work for Soma Surf Resort Nicaragua.

Share

Filed Under: anti-street harassment week, Stories Tagged With: assault, Nicaragua, running, traveling

“Mostly I felt objectified”

April 13, 2016 By Contributor

I was walking through a shopping center parking lot. I wanted to cross to the sidewalk, and a car slowed to let me pass. An elderly man with a guitar case shouted to me, “Come on girl, come on girl!” as if to hurry me along, and he sounded and looked amused. It felt very demeaning, as if he was talking to a dog. I hurried past and kept walking fast, and I crossed another street and took a route through a housing development because I noticed he seemed to be going in the same direction as me. I was not necessarily afraid of being molested, but it did make me nervous. Mostly I felt objectified, and that made me resentful.

By the way, I was wearing ripped-up but not revealing jeans, a loose black T-shirt, my hair was very plain and I had no makeup on.

Optional: What’s one way you think we can make public places safer for everyone?

I don’t have a good solution; but I think the older generation should be taught somehow that talking to random women disrespectfully is not okay. Maybe it was in their younger days, but times have changed.

– Anonymous

Location: Ventura, CA

Share your street harassment story for the blog.
See the book 50 Stories about Stopping Street Harassers for more idea
.

Share

Filed Under: Stories, street harassment

“We have to engage everyone in the conversation.”

April 13, 2016 By Contributor

I was walking with my girlfriend down Connecticut Ave in DC and we were holding hands. Three times within one block, we walked by men who were well into their 50s (we are in our 20s), and every one of them made a comment and stared at her, looked at her up and down. They said things to me like, “Wow aren’t you a lucky guy!” or just simply saying “wow” or whistles as we walked by.

This made me mad. Not because other men were taking glances at my girlfriend. It made me mad that she had to go through that. I was sad and frustrated with a world that says that’s okay. I wish she didn’t have to feel objectified and reduced to just an object that “I was lucky to own.” I wish she could have just walked down a main street and just be herself, without worrying about men staring at her body.

Optional: What’s one way you think we can make public places safer for everyone?

Awareness is key. A lot of men don’t think that street harassment is an issue. They don’t see it happen so they don’t think it’s real. We have to engage everyone in the conversation.

– Anonymous

Location: Washington, DC

Share your street harassment story for the blog.
See the book 50 Stories about Stopping Street Harassers for more idea
.

Share

Filed Under: male perspective, Stories, street harassment

300 Afghan Students, Teachers Speak out Against Street Harassment

April 10, 2016 By Contributor

“Harassing women and girls does not make you a man.”
“Harassing women and girls does not make you a man.”

To commemorate International Anti-Street Harassment Week, Free Women Writers, an Afghan blog for social justice and gender equality, called on people around the country to send photos with messages about the harassment of women and girls in public spaces. Within the first week, dozens of powerful pictures were sent to the blog via Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, and Email.

The photos and the messages were inspiring, but Star Educational Society (SES), a private learning center with branches in several provinces in Afghanistan, went beyond that and engaged hundreds of students and teachers in speaking out against street harassment.

In three different branches located in Kabul, SES organized class discussions about street harassment in which men and women spoke about the problem and efficient ways of fighting with it. Then students and teacher wrote and took pictures with signs about street harassment. The pictures and slogans were published in the center’s newspaper to encourage further debate.

“With this campaign we not only stand against the negative perceptions that exist about Afghan men, but we also redefine masculinity and stand firm to build a better community,” said Ali Reza Yasa, Chairman and Chief Executive Officer at SES.

"Good men don't harass women. They support them," some of the signs read.
“Good men don’t harass women. They support them,” some of the signs read.

12498485_590868481066724_833176978_n12789989_10153830915469471_1781306621_oUsing Free Women Writer’s campaign, SES not only created a meaningful debate about street harassment in their centers but also allowed students the opportunity to feel agentic by raising their voices. According to Yasa, one of the most encouraging outcomes of the campaign was that girls, who usually do not want to take photos due to fear of violence or harassment, participated with enthusiasm and passion.

“We are so glad to have been part of this initiative. The culture of street harassment has to end. Let’s hope for a better Afghanistan, one we all deserve,” Yasa said.

 

 

Noorjahan Akbar is a human rights advocate from Afghanistan. She runs Free Women Writers, a blog about gender equality and social justice in Afghanistan. 

Share

Filed Under: anti-street harassment week Tagged With: Afghanistan, Free Women Writers, SES

« Previous Page
Next Page »

Share Your Story

Share your street harassment story for the blog. Donate Now

From the Blog

  • #MeToo 2024 Study Released Today
  • Join International Anti-Street Harassment Week 2022
  • Giving Tuesday – Fund the Hotline
  • Thank You – International Anti-Street Harassment Week 2021
  • Share Your Story – Safecity and Catcalls Collaboration

Buy the Book

  • Contact
  • Events
  • Join Us
  • Donate
  • Facebook
  • Instagram
  • Pinterest
  • Tumblr
  • Twitter
  • YouTube

Copyright © 2026 Stop Street Harassment · Website Design by Sarah Marie Lacy