Dylan Jane Manderlink, Arkansas, USA, SSH Blog Correspondent

As a recent transplant to the rural south from Boston, MA, I have experienced a great deal of shock that comes from the geographical and cultural differences between a northern city and a rural town in the south. I have also faced differences in human experiences that have propelled me into conversations that I never thought I’d have.

One of the biggest changes I noticed in my new life is how I now felt while walking through a public space. Walking along my town’s quaint Main Street, I am greeted with warm southern hospitality and have not been subjected to catcalls, leery eyes, and unwanted attention. Now, that’s not to say that catcalling doesn’t exist in southern areas, but at least in my personal experience so far, I have not yet been exposed to it. My existence in a public space feels different now and because of that, I feel motivated to speak out about the street harassment that plagues urban environments and spread awareness of it in my new community.

As a 20-something first-year teacher, my students feel very comfortable seeking advice from me, sharing their concerns, venting about their stressors, and updating me on their lives. I have been grateful for the opportunities I’ve had to build meaningful relationships with my high school students. The connections I’ve been able to make with my students have helped us develop a common ground, despite our geographical and cultural differences. Through establishing this common ground, an important dialogue has been opened between me and my students concerning a variety of hard-hitting and sensitive issues.

Recently, one of my female students expressed frustration and discomfort with the way male students look at her and talk about her outfits and body. She asked me if I had ever experienced uninvited and uncomfortable situations like that. I told her that because of street harassment I had, especially while living in Boston.

Despite living in very different regions of the United States, the conversations I have had about street harassment with my students have helped develop a vital and ongoing dialogue about female empowerment and the unfortunate objectification of female bodies in the public and media. Most of my students were unaware of street harassment until I opened up to them about my personal experiences, the experiences of my friends, and the reality of it in our society today. Through these productive conversations and teachable moments, I have realized how important opening up a channel of dialogue amongst young people in a rural area about street harassment, gender-based violence, and the treatment of self-identified women in society can be.

Our geographical differences should not equate to an unawareness of social injustice. I believe it is our duty as civilians and social activists to generate meaningful conversations that spark change, awareness, and genuine concern for the well-being of others across our nation’s zip codes and beyond our country’s borders. Of course it’s important to note that there are many regional differences in our nation that bring about challenges, injustices, and ailments that are unique to that environment, but I think we are doing a disservice to our nation and world’s social injustices by not equalizing awareness and attention to these issues. The injustices that plague one community, affect us all.

The more we are unafraid to approach these tough but significant conversations, the more we can   rally around solutions to issues that are debasing populations and the basic humanity of people. These cross-cultural and cross-geographical conversations have the potential to defy the physical barriers that separate us and create more unity than we may have thought.

As a teacher, I have the privilege of initiating and partaking in important conversations like these everyday with my students. But I understand that some careers don’t allow this to happen as frequently or accessibly as mine. With that said, my charge to you is to fearlessly approach these conversations with people who you share commonalities with but also differ greatly from. Often, it’s through our differing human experiences that we can construct a diverse, deep, and productive conversation that has the potential to lead to solutions to some of our society’s most complex and murky problems. Despite my students not having been exposed to street harassment before, they have gained a new perspective on a societal injustice that impacts us all.

Dylan is a recent graduate of Emerson College and currently teaches 8th, 10th, and 11th grade Digital Communications and Audio/Visual Technology in an Arkansas high school. You can visit her personal blog and follow her on Twitter @DylanManderlink.

LB Klein, Georgia, USA, SSH Blog Correspondent

**Trigger Warning** for themes of gender-based violence, nonconsensual touching, adults asking children to commit violent acts

Near the end of a new Italian viral video dubbed “Slap Her: Children’s Reactions,” a man off camera asks boys to slap a girl. They refuse. Then comes the tagline “In the kids’ world, women don’t get hit.”

In theory, I would be ecstatic to see a PSA on this topic reach 12.5 million viewers, particularly one that engages young people, especially boys, in the conversation.  But “Slap Her” is not that video, it only masquerades as a PSA about gender-based violence. In reality, it doesn’t actually address the critical global public health problem of gender-based violence. Instead, it trivializes the issue while it perpetuates the exact cultural norms that perpetuate violence.

I watched this video and felt emotional, not because I was moved by the message of “Slap Her,” but because I was deeply uncomfortable. Here are three reasons why:

1. Martina is depicted as a prop, not a person.

The video begins on a light note with the boys answering questions about their names, their ages, what they want to be when they grow up, and why they want to pursue those careers.  There is significant time dedicated to helping us get to know the boys and who they hope to become.   It’s impossible not to like them and feel a connection.

Romantic music swells, and–enter Martina.  Martina isn’t asked any questions, and we are not given exposition to see her as a real person. She is literally voiceless.  We hear about her only through the boys’ descriptions of her appearance. The one adjective used to describe her (repeatedly) is “pretty.”  We don’t find out about Martina’s goals for the future.  While the boys are full characters in the story, Martina is just a prop.

The off-camera male voice asks the boys to talk about what they like about Martina, to caress her, and to make funny faces at her. In the video’s climax, they are asked to “slap her, hard.”  The boys are depicted as having the agency to obey or disobey the voice, but what about Martina’s agency?  She is not asked for her consent. In fact, she is completely silent and looks nervous throughout. While the video sends a message that even young boys know that hitting a girl is wrong, it also depicts girls as lacking in bodily autonomy.  What if this so-called “social experiment” had gone the way of Milgram, and the boys had obeyed the authority figure and hit Martina? Does anyone ask her how she feels?

2. Gender-based violence is oversimplified to a slap.

This video reduces gender-based violence to a slap. In reality, abusers would rarely, if ever, (knowingly) slap a woman on camera.  Abusers are also rarely strangers.  I am NOT relieved that the boys don’t hit Martina on cue. I would be truly shocked if one of them did.

Gender-based violence involves power and control and abuse that is not only physical but emotional, psychological, economic, and spiritual.  Physical violence can certainly be a part of abuse, but it is used as one tactic to gain control and dominance.  Abuse typically escalates over time and includes dominance, humiliation, isolation, threats, intimidation, and denial.  A small percentage of men hit their partners, but they are allowed to get away with it because of the exact culture of male dominance that “Slap Her” perpetuates.

The boys say they don’t slap Martina because men shouldn’t hit (pretty) girls, and they’re “real men.”  The moral of the video seems to be that even young boys know it’s not okay to hit women, thus shaming any adult who would think gender-based violence is acceptable.  By framing the boys’ responses in this way, the video uses the exact gender stereotypes that perpetuate violence to speak out against it. Violence is reduced to a slap, and the boys are not called to question their power.  These gender stereotypes limit children of all genders and can be, quite literally, deadly for women and trans people.

The same logic that keeps these boys from slapping Martina props up male entitlement.  Street harassment is so often dismissed because women and girls should “take it as a compliment.” This video endorses Martina as a pretty thing for the boys to desire, admire, and even touch, as long as they don’t hit her on command.  That is not revolutionary. That’s patriarchy.

3. It’s not a PSA; it’s Clickbait.

I asked an Italian friend to help me wade through information about this site and video, as I don’t speak Italian beyond what I’ve learned visiting the restroom at Macaroni Grill.  It appeared so abruptly that I needed to know its origins.

“Slap Her” is not a PSA created in partnership with survivors or violence prevention organizations. Fanpage.it is a news site focused on generating clickbait. Luca Iavatore, who has been identified as the off-screen voice, is a video journalist/cultural media reporter for Fanpage.it.

There is no trigger warning. There are no resources listed for survivors, abusers, or folks who are triggered by its content. There are no links to websites to learn more about the issue. There is no call to action.  There is not context or discussion of who debriefed with the boys or Martina. In fact, there is no other information on Fanpage.it about gender-based violence. This video is generating profit for Fanpage.it, and there is no information on their site about proceeds going to benefit gender-based violence advocacy or prevention causes.  The intentions of folks at Fanpage.it might be excellent.

However, without further information, I can’t help but think “Slap Her” is a publicity stunt. The children in this video, and the viewers’ emotions, are being exploited, and Fanpage.it is pocketing advertising dollars.  It would be a truly brilliant marketing ploy, if it weren’t completely unethical. The creators of this video owe its viewers, the children who were filmed, and survivors an apology.

One small edit could have taken this video from harmful to thought-provoking. The video ends, seemingly for comic relief, with one of the boys asking the off-camera man “Can I kiss her on the cheek or on the lips?”  One line of additional dialogue could have completely changed the message to one of liberation. “Slap Her” could have simply added: “Why don’t you ask Martina?” That one line could have taken the boys’, and the audience’s, commitment to ending violence one step further by acknowledging Martina’s bodily autonomy and humanity.  Without this addition, “Slap Her” is a missed opportunity at best and a harmful perpetuation of status quo at worst.

LB is an Atlanta-based advocate and educator dedicated to ending gender-based violence, supporting survivors, and advancing social justice.  You can follow her on twitter @LB_Klein.

Diana Hinova, Sofia, Bulgaria, SSH Blog Correspondent

In an earlier post I outlined the findings from the Runners’ Survey on perceptions of safety in Bulgaria. In short, when asked about specific forms of street harassment while running, 15% of men and 51% of women report having experienced at least one form.

A lively discussion followed when the results were shared in the public Facebook group Running for fitness. Competitions. Below are some excerpts of the public discussion, in my own translation, names removed.

In my opinion there are some downright absurd interpretations, delusions and overblown comments (oh, the internet). Many runners were open to a discussion of the topic and its gender dimension, and it is encouraging to see some male runners sensitively try to understand where such concerns come from.

But please: take a look and make your own conclusions. One final word before I leave you to it – @takebackthetech is running an open video campaign on whether and how women’s voices and women’s issues around violence are silenced online.

A (man): This seems to me like a serious issue. 50% of women have been harassed in one way or another…

B (woman): Absolutely. It happens to me all the time, especially when running after dark.

C (man): I think it’s no smaller problem that it’s happened to 15% of men also?!?

D (man): And I worry that I startle people when I’m running in the park… haha. There’s no way to eliminate these obnoxious guys. If you encounter them, signal to the nearest fellow-runner! He will help you. After all not many women run after dark. Ladies, I suggest you run with a friend! Thank God I’m a man!

E (woman): That percentage among women seems exaggerated to me. I mean I take it many of them are just lying.

F (woman): Why would they lie ???

E (woman): Hahaha why do you think? For attention and to be popular. I’m at the gym right now. No one ever bothers me and in the gym.

There’s no unwanted attention. There are subconscious signals for attention, and poor selection of the place and time for sports. Well I’m not going to the local gym at Lavov most with the arabs and the gypsies. I’m not making sexy eyes at every man and I’m not “fearing rapists”. I’m not picking crappy clothes. Things like that.

G (man): Imagine someone has recently started running. They’re not sure what they’re doing to begin with, let alone look convincing to others. Usually it shows and maybe this contributes to malicious interest. People who have ingrained training habits since childhood probably don’t have this problem, but there are others too.

H (woman): [E], unfortunately no one is 100% safe. I’ve been assaulted twice (luckily with no consequences apart from the fright) and both times it was daylight and in populated areas. I wasn’t dressed provocatively, nor did I look insecure.

F (woman): I agree with [H], just didn’t want to argue with [E] because that’s a lost cause. Both assaults on me happened in daylight during the summer. […]

C (man): If the goal was rape, then that sounds really scary, not that getting mugged is a picnic, but…

If this is really the case and you encounter these guys so often … I don’t know, but somehow we have to bring attention to this matter. It may already be known, but not acknowledged…

Diana has a Master’s in Public Policy from Georgetown University and works as a consultant to INGOs. Follow her on Twitter @dialeidoscope or letnimletni.blogspot.com.

 

България: Да си тичаща жена – обществен отзвук

Според Анкета на тичащите за усещането за безопасност (виж тук), 15% от мъжете и 51% от жените са срещали уличен тормоз по време на тичане в България.

Данните провокираха разгорещена дискусия в публичната група във Фейсбук Бягане за здраве. Състезания. По-длу са някои от коментарите в публично достъпната доискусия, имената са премахнати.

Според мен има някои направо абсурдни реакции, илюзии, и преувеличени коментари (е, това е интернет все пак). Други бегачи са по-открити за обсъждане по темата и ролята на пола в нея. Окураващо е, че някои бегачи мъже се опитват наистина да разберат причините за подобни протеснения.

Но моля: прочетете и си напрвете свои изводи.

А (мъж): Top of Form

АА Това на мен ми изглежда като огромен проблем. 50% от жените са били закачани по един или друг начин…

Б (жена): Абсолютно. И на мен ми се случва постоянно, особено като бягам вечерно време

В (мъж): На мен ми се струва не по-малък проблем, че 15% от мъжете – също ?!?

Г (мъж): Aз пък се притеснявам, че понякога бягайки стряскам хората в парка…  haha Няма начин такива нахални субекти да липсват. Ако видите такива подайте сигнал на най-близкия колега-бегач!Той ще ви помогне. Все пак не са много бягащите жени в тъмното. Госпожиците, съветвам, да бягат с другарче! Господи благодаря ти че съм мъж!

Д (жена): За мен този процент при жените изглежа завишен.
Т.е. приемам че доста от тях просто лъжат .

Е (жена): Защо им е да лъжат ???

Д (жена): Хахаа а защо според теб ?
За внимание и за да се правят на интересни .
В момента съм в залата . Сама . Никой никога не ме закача и в залите .
Няма нежелано внимание. Има несъзнавани знаци за внимание , и лоша подборка на местата и времето за спорт . Е няма да ида в кварталната зала на Лъвов мост при арабите и циганите .
Няма да гледам прелъстително всеки мъж .няма да се “страхувам от насилници ” .няма да подбирам кофти дрехи . Е такива неща .

Ж (мъж): Предтавете си, че човек тича от скоро. Той самия още не е сигурен какво прави, камо ли да изглежда убедителен за околните. Обикновенно това личи и може би създава повод за злонамерен интерес. Хора с изградени спортни навици от деца едва ли имат този проблем, но има и други.

З (жена): [Д] , за съжаление никой не е застрахован. Мен са ме нападали 2 пъти (за щастие без последствия като изключим страха) и и 2та пъти беше през деня и на места, на които има хора. Нито съм била облечена предизвикателно, нито съм изглеждала неуверена.

Е (жена): Съгласна съм с [З] просто не исках да споря с [Д], защото там каузата е загубена. И моите две нападения са били по светло и през лятото. Едното на пътя след табелата Стара Загора, а другото в града по път, по който минават сравнително малко коли и който води до парка. Добре, че бягам сравнително бързо както вече казах…. Радвай се [Д], че не са те нападали…..

В (мъж): Какво значи нападали са ви? Искали са да ви оберат или нещо по-лошо? Ако целта е била насилване, това звучи доста страшно, не че обира е нещо незначително, но …

Ако на истина е така и ако такива индивиди са толкова често срещани … не знам, но трябва по някакъв начин да се привлече внимание към проблема. Ако и той да е негласно известен …