Stories Archives | Page 219 of 449 | Stop Street Harassment

* SSH just launched a brand new Safe Public Spaces Mentoring Program to advice/guide and provide a small amount of money to groups or individuals who want help with an anti-street harassment initiative in their community.

* Watch Kara Lieff’s video “Meet Us on the Subway“

* Do-it-yourself anti-street harassment art!

* New studies about harassment of transgender people in Washington, DC and people in Ottawa, Canada

10 Tweets from the Week:

1. @brassiest It’s 2013 and men still think street harassment is a “compliment” and not terrifyingly creepy and dangerous behavior

2. @LadyT523 Men who act like caveman street harrass women. #T2Q #streetharassment

3. @BertLoch One stranger can take #StreetHarassment as a compliment. Another a threat that creates great unease. Point is YOU DON’T KNOW WHICH IS WHICH.

4. @empascall Since when is it okay for an old creepy ass man three times my age to blow kisses at me while I walk down the street? Fuck you!!!!

5. @lilly_GG Street harassment happens everywhere not just big cities, it happens in the mountains, the country and the suburbs as well…

6. @lov3yourself Thanks for letting me know I look nice but I don’t walk around for your visual pleasure #ShoutingBack #streetharassment

7. @mcbyrne Women should be able to bill @wmata for cab costs when they make mistakes and our safety isn’t secure

8. @mykasobering “Hey sexy, nice tits. Whoa, why are you so upset? It’s a compliment. I’m only being nice to you, you stupid bitch.” – Male proverb.

9. @Renegade_Blog Sooo, when is the last time you got street harassed? Where? Today? Yesterday? #stopstreetharassment #streetharassment

10. @sistrenista Can Black men in #CrownHeights just give me a few days without #streetharassment ?? I’m still seriously grieving one of your own #ugh

Street Harassment: Pervasive, But Not Unstoppable

July 21, 2013 By Contributor

Cross-posted with permission from JulieMastrine.com

EndSH_Flier5 — Image by Julie and her sister Amy

Street harassment is a global human rights problem, one that I’ve been working to combat for about two years now. As a Stop Street Harassment volunteer, I’m educated on the issue and work to help others identify these incidents and fight back when they occur, but I’m still left reeling and uncomfortable when it happens to me. And in the span of just one day this week, I was harassed four times by men in my area.

I’m currently living in State College, PA, a “college town” by any means. Home to Penn State University, every four years a new crop of undergraduate students take over the area, bringing with them the customs, norms and attitudes they’ve picked up from their respective hometowns. Penn State students hail from many corners of the country, whether it be a small town in Western PA, a suburb in New Jersey, or a city block in New York. I’ve met students from as far and wide as Hawaii, Florida, and Alaska.

But the fact that many of these students assert their power over women and LGBTQ persons by harassing them in public spaces — mostly by making sexual comments — speaks volumes as to the pervasiveness of street harassment globally. Each of these students come from different corners of the world, but street harassment is a societal norm they’ve all managed to pick up on. Year after year, it’s astonishing that this is an activity they all seem to know of and perpetrate, despite their varied backgrounds.

This weekend, I grabbed a book and threw on my bathing suit, heading to a nearby grassy knoll to sunbathe with my twin sister, Amy. We were able to enjoy just a few minutes of peace in the July heat when a man in a truck drove by, honking, leering and waving at us from the road. He had to have been over the age of 60, and I was thoroughly grossed out. I took solace in the fact that there was some physical distance between us, him on the road and me in the grass, so I flipped him off with a wry smile and continued reading. But that wasn’t the last of the objectification we’d experience that day.

Fast forward to 10 p.m. My sister and I were heading to a friend’s apartment for drinks when a group of three guys walking in front of us turned around, looked at us and started to slow down until they were walking next to us. Feeling my personal space violated by these strangers, I immediately tensed up and went silent.

“Hey, where are you girls from?” one of them asked.

Summer in State College is generally made up of permanent residents and freshmen getting a jump start on their classes, downing one too many Natty Lights in the process. My sister, sensing from their scrawny legs and general unease that they were freshmen, let out a groan and replied, “I graduated…sooo I’m way older than you,” hoping they’d get the hint we were young working professionals who were uninterested in their advances.

The guys sauntered off, but later that night, yet another group approached us on the street. It was a pack of an intimidating number of men — about 10 by my count, bleary-eyed from too many shots and walking in a triangular formation with one shorter dude leading the pack.

“Hey ladies!” he shouted in our faces as we passed.

“Ugh, dammit!“ Amy yelled back.

“Stop harassing me!” I shouted over my shoulder.

We were met with confused looks by the entire posse, clearly shocked that a female stranger on the street didn’t appreciate their scrutiny.

Three incidents of harassment in one day is enough, but a few hours later, as we headed to a birthday party, the same group of guys passed us again.

“Oh, we already tried to talk to those girls,” the pack leader said, smirking at us and then turning to his friend to make some other inaudible comments about our outfits. It would appear they’d been making a sport of harassment that night.

“Oh my GOD,” Amy shouted, even more exasperated this time. “My outfit is NOT an invitation!”

We were a few beers deep by this point and continued to yell at the men about how they should stop feeling entitled to women’s attention. But the damage had been done. During each of these instances the unwanted attention made me uncomfortable to the point that I froze up and even stumbled when it came to reasserting my power by shouting back, something I’d made a point to do as a personal rebellion against this type of behavior when it occurs (at least when I felt safe enough).

It’s also important to remember that instances like this can escalate into something much scarier and threatening. The day before my fourfold experiences with street harassment, a friend pulled me aside to spell out what happened to her on the way to work that week. On an otherwise silent 8 a.m. bus, a man sat down near her and started watching porn on his mobile device, then got an erection. Because she was going to work, she couldn’t just get off at the next stop to avoid him — she was forced to ride the entire trip with him nearby. What’s worse: he exited the bus at her stop.

My friend was able to make it safely to work despite the scare, and I encouraged her to alert the bus driver or even snap a picture and alert the police should he appear again. These incidents show that street harassment is something you never really “get used to” or accept as a compliment, as society would have women do. Each incident is jarring — annoying at the least and downright threatening and scary at the worst.

As the summer months wind down, I know this won’t be the last I’ll endure or hear about street harassment — but it sure feels good to let harassers know you’re on to their shtick and aren’t going to let them continue without knowing you’re pissed. Check out this list of assertive responses to street harassment to arm yourself if it happens to you. We may not be able to control when this problem targets us, but the least we can do is tackle it on an individual basis. Street harassment is pervasive, yes — but not unstoppable.

Julie Mastrine is a writer, PR professional, digital strategist, and experienced community outreach coordinator based in State College, PA. She’s currently a ghostwriter whose work is regularly featured in Mashable, Forbes, Business Insider, Inc. Magazine, and Inside Higher Ed. When she’s not helping clients boost their online presence, Julie volunteers in community outreach positions. She’s a social media volunteer for Stop Street Harassment and has a passion for educating others on social justice issues and organizing civic engagement efforts.

“I don’t like you, I like her”

July 20, 2013 By Contributor

So I take the train every morning to school and I noticed this guy had his phone pointed at me, and I assumed he took a picture of me since he kept looking at me and I saw he went on his picture gallery on his phone. When he noticed me looking at what he was doing on his phone, he put his phone in his pocket. The next day, he was at my train stop again, and I always take the train at a specific time, and I guess he does too or I’m not sure if he is stalking me now. Ever since, I see him everyday and I told my friends and he still keeps looking at me and my friend confronted him and she said in Spanish (he was Hispanic),

“What are you looking at?” (Que midas) He replied, “I don’t like you, I like her” (No me gusta tu, me gusta aya).

Excuse my Spanish but that’s what happened and now I’m permanently traumatized. Every time I see him he points his phone at me now and one time I saw an Asian wearing only under wear on his home screen. He is disgusting and a pedophile but I don’t have evidence to report him??? I even switched my ways getting to school, but the train is easiest and fastest for me to get to school. If he ever goes beyond this, I will call authorities and I even said that to him.

HE EVEN SITS NEXT TO ME ON THE TRAIN AND HE WHISPERED SOMETHING TO ME BUT I CANT SPEAK FLUENT SPANISH! So creepy!

– Anonymous

Location: Los Angeles, CA

Share your street harassment story for the blog.

“It’s not harassment to tell someone they are sexy.”

July 19, 2013 By Contributor

I know this might not be as bad as other people’s stories but I got hassled in the street this morning. Some random drunk man (yes it was 11 a.m.) started shouting, “Oi sexy!” over and over.

At first I didn’t think he was talking to me as it is a busy inner city street but them he adds ,”Yeah you in the white skirt,” (which was full length by the way. Not sure why I feel the need to say what I was wearing but it’s seems woman have to justify that they were not being provocative.).

At this point I sped up, still ignoring him. His female friend laughed out loud and said, “Shane, that’s sexual harassment.” You could tell by her tone that she was joking though. He replied with more shouting directed at me. “It’s not harassment to tell someone they are sexy. Is it sexy? Oi!”

Luckily I had to turn off at that point so I lost them in a crowd but the whole thing made me feel really uneasy and uncomfortable. I wish I had had the courage to tell him and his friend that yes actually it is harassment to heckle someone in the street like that. I feel silly for being so upset about it, especially as I’m not a young girl, I’m almost 30 and not used to this kind of thing.

– Vic

Location: Norwich, UK

Share your street harassment story for the blog.

USA: Unwanted and Unnoticed

July 18, 2013 By Correspondent

By Sara Schwartzkopf, Colorado, USA, SSH Correspondent

Like most women my age, I’ve experienced my fair share of street harassment. I remember the first time being when I was 14, as I was walking back to my school after lunch break. While I was waiting to cross the street, a man pulled up in a truck, rolled down the window and proceeded to make it perfectly clear that he was leering at my chest. He didn’t say a word, just gave me a suggestive eyebrow raise and a creepy smile before driving off. I remember shuddering, walking back into school and mentioning it to friends who seemed to think it a positive that an older man had “complimented” me.

I remember that instance, not so much because it was extraordinary, but because it was the first time I had a perfect stranger make clear to me that he felt entitled to make his opinion about my body known. It was also the first time that I wondered if this really was a compliment, or if my initial reaction was right that there was something deeply wrong about that encounter.

Since then I’ve had plenty of different interactions with strangers in public places. I’ve heard and witnessed people’s unsolicited opinions on my body when I was overweight, when I was a teenager, when I was out running, when I was with my mother, traveling, hiking, kayaking, walking, shopping, riding public transit, driving in my car, or simply out with friends in public. It’s a very rare occasion indeed when I count these interactions as a positive. It’s also very rare that these comments happen when I’m with a man, and I’ve noticed many of the men in my life are unfamiliar with what street harassment is.

Now both of those things are worth unpacking. As women, we’re frequently told that we are our bodies. Our self-worth becomes inherently tied to how attractive our bodies are. So when a stranger voices their opinion on our looks, it’s implied that we should take that as a compliment (or in some cases as valid criticism). The thing is we are a lot more than our bodies. We don’t need, or particularly want, random people’s opinions on how we look when we’re trying to get any myriad of things done.

The other part of not finding these interactions to be positive is that they frequently don’t come across as compliments so much as demands for attention. Ignoring a harasser on the street at night is often followed by the fear and sometimes reality of being followed. Telling someone to leave you alone sometimes escalates to insults and outright threats. I’ve heard thoughts that men who harass are just at a loss of how else to approach without getting rejected. I don’t think I buy this. I can’t believe how inept a man would have to be to think that yelling, “Nice ass!” at a passerby would net him a better response than, well, almost anything else.

The other thing is why I don’t get harassed if I’m around a man. I can only guess this: men don’t fear what I will do when they shout things at me in public. I am a woman, which means ideally I will smile when they tell me to and say thank you when a comment is offered. Regardless of whether I need or want this validation, I’m expected to take it and move on. Yet if I’m with a man it’s considered disrespectful to him, to address me. There’s a fear and a boundary line there that other men don’t cross. I think this goes a long way to explaining why most of the men I know say they’ve never seen street harassment, or even understand what it is. To them it’s an invisible problem.

Sara is a recent graduate of the University of Denver where she majored in Sociology, International Studies, and minored in Japanese. She has previously written on issues relevant to the Native American community at Le Prestige Du Monde, pulling heavily on her experiences as a mixed-race Kiowa and Chickasaw.

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