Making Public Spaces Safe and Welcoming
I fought with my husband and walked down my street and sat down at the edge of the woods near the street, trying to get a moment’s peace and stop crying. Then I hear a dude behind me saying, “You okay, babe?” And I have to tell him I’m fine, then get up and find another spot where I might be left alone.
– Anonymous
Location: Pennsylvania
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I am a very curvy woman gifted in both top and bottom areas. No matter what I wear on my way to work ranging from khakis and a polo shirt to a business casual dress that is loose fitting to slightly hugging, I always get the chicken mumbles, baboon grumbles, and all other sorts of weird and rude sounds, noises, stares, and etc. It makes me feel like a piece of meat on the food stand or at the grocery store. Basically I feel as though I am an object and not a human being.
Weird perverts have played with themselves in front of me, licked the glass where I sit on the train, and have made all sorts of catcalls. I was even called a female dog (bit**) for not responding in the anticipated way by a man, of course with his friends around. In that circumstance I was also told, and I quote, “Well I wasn’t trying to talk to/holler at your ugly a** anyway.”
It really perplexes me and makes me scared and uncomfortable to dress the way I want and to be my self. I have always been a conservative person so I don’t wear particularly revealing outfits; however these insulting jeers makes me want to just completely cover myself as I stand there and blush in shame and embarrassment which some guys seem to get off on. I’m highly suspicious walking around men especially in or near crowds of men and I buy big bags I can hide behind to protect myself as a barrier.
– T.H.
Location: Redline train in Washington DC, near 20 Mass Ave NW, near home in hyattsville MD, at grocery stores in DC and MD (PG County) , and etc
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Here’s a dose of inspiration this Wednesday:
As I’ve written about before, on July 14, 50 women and men marched against street harassment in downtown Kabul, Afghanistan. To learn more about why and what happened during the march, here’s a good news clip from an Australian station. It includes an interview with the march organizer.
To gain even more inspiration from their march, here’s an article for The WIP that I wrote about the march, which includes quotes from an organizer and participant. Here’s an excerpt (full article):
“Carrying banners and signs with messages like, “We will not tolerate harassment,” “Islam forbids men from insulting women,” and “I have the right to walk freely in my city,” on July 14, 50 brave women and men marched together from Kabul University to the Afghanistan Independent Human Rights Commission. As they marched, they handed out fliers to raise awareness about the problem of street harassment in their country.
Most of the bystanders stood shocked, openly staring as the marchers passed by. It is not common to see women and men marching together through Kabul, nor is it typical to hear people speak out on an issue like street harassment. Despite the presence of a police escort, some men even heckled the marchers and called them names. Others were supportive and took fliers or started walking with the marchers.Tabasum Wolayat, a student at Middlebury College in Vermont, said that she was both excited and nervous to participate in the march. “As an Afghan woman who is harassed on a daily basis in the public sphere, I thought, ‘it is me who has to fight for myself, my mother, and my sisters’ safety, dignity, and rights.’”She noted that her family was very supportive of her participation, but some of her female friends were not. They worried about her safety.
March organizer Noorjahan Akbar, a 19-year-old student at Dickinson College in Pennsylvania, also received support from her family. Her entire family, including her mother and father who both have health issues, participated in the march with her. A few days after the march, Akbar said it had gone better than she expected and that she feels “so much stronger” because of the outpouring of support for their efforts.
In the spring of 2011, Akbar founded the Kabul-based group Young Women for Change (YWC) to help increase the political, social, economic and cultural participation of women across the country. Through discussions at their first meetings, it quickly became clear that the sexual harassment women experience on the streets hinders their participation in all these areas. In collaboration with another group, Hadia, they decided to launch an anti-street harassment campaign that began with the march.” (full article)
I look forward to reading about what the women do next!
I’m on vacation this week. I was at Glacier National Park in northwest Montana over the weekend and now I’m en route to northern Utah to my grandparent’s cabin. Dillon, Montana, is about half way and is where we stayed the night last night. Just as I have every morning of the vacation, I got up and went running this morning.
When I was about a mile into my 7 mile run, trotting down the main road of the small town, I heard whistling. I turned around and saw two (very white) guys in their early twenties walking toward me. They whistled again when they saw I was looking at them. One of them yelled, “Mmm, I’d like to go running with you” in a creepy way.
I yelled, “Hey, don’t harass me!” at them. They were quiet for a few seconds, then one of them said, “Okay, have a nice day,” while the other one chimed in with an “I love you!” as I sprinted around a corner to get away from them.
I get harassed a lot when I go running, but usually it’s by men going by in cars and I rarely have an opportunity to respond. This time I did and it was empowering! Of course, later I thought of better things I could have said, but I’m glad I at least said something to stand up for myself and for women runners everywhere!
– Holly
Location: South Montana Street & East Sebree Street, Dillon, Montana
Share your street harassment story today and help raise awareness about the problem.
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I live in a small town and have always enjoyed walking, and as long as I can remember this enjoyment has been dampened by catcalls and harassment regularly. I learned to “ignore it” because that was “just the way some guys are.”
I was taught to stay safe, avoid walking alone in certain neighborhoods and at night. I was taught that to say anything back when construction workers or drivers harassed me would provoke them further, so I accepted these tense moments during otherwise pleasant walks in my hometown.
One of the worst memories I have of street harassment was when I was walking home from a wonderfully calming yoga class, feeling all at peace and grateful for my life and my surroundings, when I started hearing men’s voices yelling and squealing the “p” word for a part of a woman’s anatomy. They yelled it over and over, and I felt degraded and afraid. I walked as fast as I could and called a friend the minute I got home to tell her what had happened. The guys were gone and I was safe but still felt horrible. This made me extremely angry.
A few days ago I was sitting in my parked car in a public parking lot in town, with my window down while I talked on the phone with a friend. Another car pulled up beside me, and a woman got out of the passenger side and walked into the store. The man who had been driving followed, and I kept on talking on the phone. Suddenly the man appeared in my window saying, “I don’t mean to scare you or anything but you are beautiful.” I told him, “That does scare me” as he hurried away. My friend said I should not have let him know I was afraid, but it was just what came out at that moment. I did drive away immediately after, though. We joked about what I should have said. (“I have an STD”??) But in all honesty this is not a laughing matter and men need to know that we do not like it or find it flattering when we are approached by strangers complimenting our appearances.
I put a “PSA” as my facebook status to the men about it. I think some guys feel obligated to do this, or that we need it to help our self esteem. For me it is extremely offensive that a man would think he has a right to say anything about my appearance when I don’t know him, let alone when I’m on the phone alone in my car.
I’m glad this is something that is being taken seriously. Too many guys think they are entitled to harass women or don’t even see what they are doing as harassment. I dream of a day when women can go about their business in the world without having to deal with this stuff. Thank you!
– Anonymous
Location: Pennsylvania
Share your street harassment story today and help raise awareness about the problem.
Find suggestions for what YOU can do about this human rights issue.