Stop Street Harassment

Making Public Spaces Safe and Welcoming

More than 45 minutes of stalking

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I was walking down the street in downtown Toronto, and a guy in front of me walking in the opposite direction stopped to oogle me and seemed to mouth something like “Wow” (I was wearing my headphones and walking very quickly, so I ignored it.) After 10 minutes of walking, I reached a bookstore and used their facilities on the second floor. Immediately after leaving the restroom, the same man who I encountered 10 minutes ago was outside and blocked my path, saying, “Wow, what’s your background?”

I got out of his way and said, “I have to go. Bye” (I’m usually not this polite, but I was just taken a back by his creepiness/stalking).

I spent another 20 minutes downtown, browsing in various stores, etc. Then I walked another 10 minutes to a nearby mall. I spent about 10 minutes in one store, I tried something on, then I purchased it. Then, as I was exiting that store, who do you think I found right outside? Creepy stalker guy.

I try to bolt away, he proceeds to run after me, trying to hand me his number. I yell to him, “NO! F*** OFF!” He then backs off. I walk home, but am paranoid that this creep may be following me still and find out where I live.

Oh yeah, and someone else harassed me on my way back home.

– anonymous

Location: downtown Toronto

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“Can’t Even Drive With My Windows Open”

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I have shared multiple stories here now, each incident taking place in Massachusetts, either in or near Boston. Brockton, East Boston, Lexington, and now, Revere.

It was a fairly nice day when I was driving on the Lynn Way towards Boston, driver’s window open. I had my music on and wasn’t bothering anyone when an older looking black Honda drove up in the lane next to me. Three or four guys, probably teenagers or in their early twenties began to stuck to their heads out of their own windows and stare at me, and it was clear they wanted me to make eye contact with them. I denied them this, and instead rolled up all my windows and
continued to drive like nothing was happening.

Then, they began to stick their hands out of their windows and point at me, which had me starting to feel terrified. what the hell did that mean? Why were they pointing at me? Probably to get my attention, of course. I refused to bat an eyelash at them. They, however, refused to quit acting like idiots and didn’t stop until they finally turned off towards Point of Pines, Revere.

I know harassment is everywhere, but I’ve had too many stories in MA alone, so I urge all MA ladies to report their stories. Clearly the men here aren’t getting the message.

The boys were driving a Black Honda, MA plate number 6WE-590.

– anonymous

Location: Revere, MA

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Hey sugar

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I was yelled at from the street, asked if I wanted a ride, called pet names like “doll” and “gorgeous.” I was wearing a loose tshirt and jeans, with my hair up and no makeup. Ladies, it’s not about what you’re wearing. Pervs will be pervs.

This afternoon, I was biking. A guy followed me on his bike yelling things at me, until thankfully i lost him or he gave up. I ignored him. I was scared of what he could do.

Another time a man asked me if I wanted a walk to my car, and tried to give me his number so I could ‘visit’ him sometime. The man was in his 50s. I am 18.

How come being a woman is somehow equivalent to “wants to be harassed/cant say no/open for sex” in a creep’s mind.

This needs to stop. Now.

– anonymous

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You’d better not be following me!

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I was shopping in Wal-Mart the other day, minding my own business. I noticed a man staring at me and watching me as I shopped. A self-defense manual I read states clearly that women in particular are wise to be aware of and know who is watching them. So, I looked back at him, without comment, made a mental note of this person and went about my business shopping. This encounter was at the front of the store, near the entrance.

I made my way to the back of the store. A short time later, I see the same man turn the corner and walk down the aisle I was in. He approached me and said, “How are you doing, baby?” I looked him in the eye and said, “Are you following me? You’d better not be following me.” He got really rattled at that and said, “Oh no, no…” and walked away quickly. As he left I said, “Maybe I need to call security!”

I never saw that guy’s face again.

Most of you who shop at Wal-Mart know they are pretty huge. It’s not like a tiny little family market where you are likely to keep running into the same person. I don’t know if he had been watching me to see what aisle I turned down, but his appearance once again was deliberate to me. All I know is I felt trouble when I saw him again, especially after experiencing those initial uncomfortable stares.

Like so many other women who post here, I am tired of being forced to deal with these intrusive, immature, entitled males who think they have the right to follow a total stranger, who is a woman because they feel like it. Too often, we are forced to confront second-rate masculine energy, a far cry from a truly empowered male energy that considers carefully his actions toward women and how he may come across. Daily, we are dealing with men who only think about themselves and their base desires, not whether they are making their female “target” feel unsafe. I have a lot of anger at how men have contributed to my feelings of a lack of safety in public. I’m always watching my back-I carry mace and whistle at all times.

One last thing: I’m tired of being expected to follow some sort of conservative dress code as a way of avoiding unwanted attention from men. It plain does not work. And it’s making me and other women responsible for how men behave. I have experienced catcalling by men in public wearing full winter gear: gloves, hat, coat, boots-no skin showing whatsoever except for my face. So don’t tell me to watch what signals I’m sending. If women’s dress could change men’s behavior, no woman wearing a burqa would ever be raped or assaulted-but we all know that they are, no matter what they do. Its time men started asking themselves what signals they are sending. I’ve had it with being held responsible for the undisciplined behavior of men. I will not take responsibility for their reactions to me.

The vast majority of men can walk around without a shirt on without fear of female violence acted out towards them. But if I have the audacity to wear a low-cut shirt or a tube-top, I’m the bad girl who deserves to be raped and harassed? This is crap. Men are responsible for their nasty, threatening, hateful behavior towards women, not me and my outfit that I have every right to wear.

I have one question for harassing men: What is it about women’s breasts and bodies that make you incapable of acting like a decent human being?

– LS

Location: Denver, CO

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Assault in Nantes

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These are two stories, but they occurred in the same city — Nantes, France, in the Pays de la Loire province.

Story 1– I was waiting for a tram in the middle of a sunny afternoon in April. I planned to take the tram from Commerce (the center of town) to Petits Ports-Facultes, where my French university was located. As I waited for the tram, a man came up to me and rubbed his hands and arms all over my breasts. At first shocked, I started screaming and he ran away. There were easily 100+ onlookers who did nothing. It was terrible.

Story 2– Also in Nantes, I was taking the evening bus circuit from town (Commerce) to my host family’s home (near Montbazon). A strange man had followed my friends and I after dinner, but I wasn’t worried — it was only around 8pm and there’s no way he could be THAT harmful, right? He followed me onto the bus, and partway through the ride home I noticed that he was masturbating, on the bus, and staring at me with frightening and disturbing desire. Every time I moved as if I were getting off the bus, he would stand, and I knew I would be followed if I decided to stop. He moved to sit behind me, and, while he reached to touch my hair, I immediately moved to the front to sit behind the driver. I missed my stop and soon, the masturbating pervert and I were the only people on the bus. Fortunately, as the stop cycled back, a Nantes transport police officer boarded the bus. I told him what was happening, and he was dismissive. “See if he gets off first. If so, you’re fine. If not, we’ll arrest him back in the center of town.” The officer did nothing — not even talk to the man. Eventually, the man ‘finished’ — staring at me all the while– and got off the bus. I finally passed by my stop, got off the bus, and vomited on the side of the road.

– anonymous

Location: Nantes, France, in the Pays de la Loire province

Share your street harassment story today and help raise awareness about the problem. Include your location and it will be added to the Street Harassment Map.

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