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Scary harassment incidences in New Orleans

June 1, 2010 By HKearl

I’ve been experiencing typical forms of street harassment like catcalls etc. since I was a teen but in the last two weeks I have had multiple frightening and almost violent encounters. I live in New Orleans very close to Bourbon Street and work there but before you assume it is the location, I can honestly say I’ve lived here since August with few problems.

Last night was the worst. I chose to walk home from work on Bourbon St. specifically because it is busy and full of police officers. A man approached and attempted to make small talk as I walked. He was polite and non-threatening and I’m fairly friendly so I responded but kept walking. Then he suggested that we go some else. I explained that I had to go home. He suddenly grabbed my arm and attempted to pull me. I pushed him hard, cursing and yelling at him to never touch me again.

Out of nowhere this girl appears and lunged at me. I respond to violence with anger so I shoved her away from me. I’m guessing this couple worked as a team to either rob-or worse sexually assault-young women. It was like the female was waiting at the place the man stopped me at. Weird.

The worst part of the story is that a cop came into the scene. I immediately approached him and begged him to help me so that they wouldn’t follow me home.

His response, “Have you been drinking tonight?”

Stunned I say, “Yes, I’ve had a few I’m a dancer at a club. It’s part of my job. I’m just trying to get home.” He threatens to arrest ME for public drunkenness. I was not slurring my words or stumbling. Another man even stepped into vouch for me but the cop insisted that if I was still there when he got back I would be arrested.

A Good Samaritan luckily walked me home. My two attackers were standing a block away staring at me. I did report the incident to another police officer who was more understanding. I just couldn’t believe the first cop blew me off and treated me as the criminal. It is possible he thought it was a drunken fight between to women (if he hadn’t seen the man grab me). But still I spoke clearly and respectfully when I explained the situation.

I’ve had other less frightening versions of street harassment that also happened recently. One night my friend and I were walking and a group of guys started catcalling us. We ignored them. A few guys didn’t like our rejection so they followed us, closely, screaming obscenities. Her response was to ignore it because she feels they want a reaction. I don’t feel that I should ever have someone breathing down my neck. I told them “to back the F- off. We were not interested”. It worked, they stopped.

Another night a car full of guys began following me doing the whole catcalling routine. I wasn’t bothered until they drove the car in reverse to continue “talking” to me. They drove off finally and I went on my merry way to grab some food. On my way back those same guys passed again. They slowed down and followed me about half a block. As I tried to ignore them, and silently prayed that they aren’t going to abduct me, they ask, “Are we scaring you?”

Umm no how could it possibly be frightening to follow a single girl on a desolate street at night. Of course they knew it was frightening. Why ask if they didn’t.

I responded calmly, “No actually you aren’t scaring me. You’re annoying me. Please leave me alone now.” I looked them dead in the eye when I spoke.
I don’t understand how society considers letting men think it is ok to behave this way.

Thank you for this site.

–  Megan Kelley

Location: New Orleans, LA

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Filed Under: Stories Tagged With: louisiana, new orleans

“Need a ride?”

May 31, 2010 By Contributor

I was repeatedly yelled, bonked, barked and whistled at while running (for exercise, not for my life). I was also asked 2 or 3 times if I needed a ride. All of the people were men.

– A. Brown

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Filed Under: Stories Tagged With: harassment while running, Stories, street harassment

“Unleash your Inner Death Metal Singer! Holla Back!”

May 28, 2010 By Contributor

One day, several years ago, I thought my boyfriend was whistling at me outside of our apartment, I turned around and made eye contact with the actual man who whistled at me, a stranger. I noticed he seemed shocked and uncomfortable that I acknowledged him. I realized no one really says anything back to these men and I really wanted to start letting them know that not all women will pretend it didn’t happen. I wanted to humiliate them by acknowledging his ridiculous behavior.

A few years later I was walking in Eugene, OR on 5th and Blair with a female friend of mine when a man stopped at a light whistled at us. Fed up with men treating my friends and me like shit, I turned around, and in my best death metal voice yelled “FUCK OFF!!” The light turned green and the man followed us slowly down the street. I kept my phone in my hand in case we needed to call for help. We approached a one way street and walked the wrong way so he couldn’t follow us anymore.

I felt scared that this man might retaliate against me for standing up for myself. But mostly I felt proud of myself and hoped that I could make a dent in the frequency in which men treat women like this. I am so fucking sick of feeling confined to my home in hopes of avoiding this kind of intimidation! Unleash your inner “death metal singer” and Holla Back!

– anonymous

Location: Eugene, OR

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Filed Under: Stories, street harassment Tagged With: sexual harassment, street harassment, wolf whistling

DC metro assault

May 27, 2010 By Contributor

I live in Washington, DC and got on the metro at Farragut North and was headed to Gallery Place/Chinatown. I saw a man staring at me in the metro station and it was extremely crowded. He would not take his eyes off me and I started to feel really uncomfortable. When I reached Gallery Place/Chinatown Metro Stop he saw me getting off and decided to get off the train as well. I was pretty certain that was not his stop.

He grabbed my right arm tightly and flung me against the wall as soon as I got off the metro. He started saying very inappropriate things about what he wanted to do to me, how gorgeous he thought I was, and how he could help me with my career. He told me to get out my phone and save his phone number and he was still grabbing my arm very tightly. Finally he let me go and just stared at me as I ran up the escalator. I couldn’t believe that among all of the hundreds of people in the metro station, not one person stopped to see if I was o kay, when I clearly looked uncomfortable, upset, and scared.

I never reported it and then about a week later I was in Starbucks and I hear a man behind me say, “SURPRISE!” It was the same man that harassed me in the metro station and I cannot even explain to you how startled I was. He said, “Look, I want to apologize, I think we got off on the wrong foot last time we met.”

Every emotion flew through my body at that very moment and I screamed at him and told him how inappropriate he was and how he should know better than to grab a woman like that. I told him he had no right to do what he did and he had no business following me into Starbucks. I told him I had no interest in speaking with him and I think every person getting coffee that morning heard as well. He tried to explain that he was a “professional” and why couldn’t we just have a “professional” conversation. He said he was offended that I thought so poorly of him.

Honestly, the whole situation was unbelievable. You always have to be careful because you never know who can be watching you or following you. That man clearly knew my route to work and followed me into the Starbucks that I go to every morning. Don’t be afraid to speak out and let people know when they do something that violates you and is absolutely UNACCEPTABLE.

– ZK

Location: Washington, DC

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Filed Under: Stories, street harassment Tagged With: assault, Stories, street harassment, washington dc metro

Train bridge harasser

May 27, 2010 By Contributor

I recently graduated high school. One day I was headed to lunch with some friends and I passed under the train bridge. I made the mistake of locking eyes with some guy coming in the opposite direction. I quickly averted my eyes, but after we had passed he circled back.

“Is your name Sarah? Are you a junior at __ High School?”

I told him I wasn’t Sarah and I wasn’t a junior. My friends and I tried to walk off. He walked with us. Still assuming I was under 18, he asked for my phone number. I turned him down and we walked off very quickly.

– anonymous

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Filed Under: Stories, street harassment Tagged With: sexual harassment, street harassment

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