Last week at the end of the work day I exited my office, and approached my car parked directly out front. In the few seconds it takes to make this walk a young male spotted me as he drove past and yelled out his window “”….f@$% you in your P@$$#!”” I couldn’t make out all of it, but it is by far the most violent of words I have heard someone hurl at me as they drive past. I was the only person on the street.

I don’t consider myself an easy target. Although it’s summer, there was nothing skimpy about my clothing. I try to dress nicely, but I’m not an attention-grabber. I consider myself average looking, and don’t think I have ever fit the stereotypical profile of someone that some people might justify is “asking for it.”  I prefer to keep to myself, and behave with dignity. By the sound of the pubescent cracks in that kid’s voice, I’d guess I’m at least ten years his elder. I highly doubt I’ve ever come into contact with him before, or that I ever will again. I was just a woman getting into her car.

At other times I’ve been an average woman out for a walk with a group of friends, or a woman waiting at a do not cross light. In some ways it is comforting that these encounters are anonymous. I can imagine that these men would not yell insults at me while they were within range of a pepper spray canister. However, it’s confusing that such an average woman can be assaulted anywhere, at any time, simply because I must walk down a street.

– BKM

Location: Lacey, WA

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I’m 54 years old.  I don’t get yelled at any more.  And it is a relief. Every time I pass a construction site I get a little lift just from knowing that I won’t be yelled at.

But the problem is worse than ever.  And I refuse to just bask in the privilege of no longer being a target.

Last year I was walking behind a young woman as we passed a construction site.  She got cat called.  I called out to her.

“Miss, are you alright?”

“Yeah, yeah, I’m fine,” she walked quickly away, humiliated.

I stopped in front of the men who had yelled at her.

“Hey!”  I yelled, over the sound of the jackhammer.

“What?”

“What the hell was that about?”

“What?  What’s going on?”  They were looking around, confused.

“Why did you yell at that woman?”

They groaned to each other.  “Why don’t you move along, lady.”

“I’ll tell you why!  I have a daughter her age!  What the hell is your problem?”

“Why don’t you mind your own business?”

“It’s my business now!  I want to see your manager right now.  I’m calling 911 and reporting harassment if you don’t get him out here right NOW.”

They chose to ignore me.  I phoned it in. The 911 receptionist was nearly indifferent.  But I made sure they saw me call it in.  And then I called the construction company and let the receptionist know that I was very unimpressed with the company.  I wasn’t able to have a direct conversation with anyone or get taken seriously about it.  But I think I gave them a tiny scare.

Optional: What’s one way you think we can make public places safer for everyone?

People who don’t get harassed need to make a stink about it and let the world know it’s intolerable.  Victims themselves cannot always stand up because they are busy saving themselves.  The rest of us who DON’T get cat-called are morally obligated to make it stop.

– Robbie

Location: Littleton, Colorado

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Every day I walk down the street to my home in London I get comments from men ranging from “compliments,” to comments about my body, to something more explicit. Every time I feel attacked, undermined, disrespected, vulnerable and furious! These men know women don’t want to hear it. It’s not a compliment, it’s a power play. It’s objectification and it’s unacceptable.

I’m not very young, very pretty or very remarkable – I’m just a normal woman trying to walk home safely and quietly. What do you do in a situation like that? Do I stand up and risk my own safety or say nothing and feel like a victim? I know other women face far worse but still, to me this is not okay!

Optional: What’s one way you think we can make public places safer for everyone?

Make it an offence, by law, to sexually harass in the street as it is in the office. But, the root is education. Let’s teach our children and teenagers it’s unacceptable and hopefully this disrespect will die out.

– Mary-Anne

Location: Harringay, Londo, UK

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My father had just retired from the Air Force and we had moved off base.  This meant I had to walk from my house to the train station, then take the train to the stop right outside of Yokota AFB.

I was fifteen.  I took the same route every day.  Then one morning, a little after six, a man stepped out a bit ways ahead of me..  He stood on the side of the road.  I could see that his pants were down.  And he began to masturbate profusely

I looked away quickly, but I had to walk past him to get to where I was going.  So I did quickly, trying my best to ignore the movements he was making, scared that he would come and it would land on me.  But somehow, I made it through.

I’ve never told anyone this story.  I remember feeling shameful, like I had done something wrong to bring this on me.

– Anonymous

Location: Japan

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