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International Day Against Victim-Blaming

April 3, 2012 By HKearl

Study after study shows that over 80 percent of women and girls have experienced street harassment, including 99 percent of women in Yemen, where women are usually covered in public places. Girls and women face street harassment while wearing all kinds of clothes: from school uniforms to business suits, from exercise clothes to winter coats, from swimming suits to party clothes.

It is clear that street harassment is not about what women/girls wear or where they go. Instead, street harassment is about disrespect, power and control, and bad manners.

Blaming people – asking what they were wearing or saying it’s because they’re “pretty” or “provocative” takes attention away from what’s really going on. It gives harassers a free pass.

Street harassment will never end until the victim-blaming ends. I am against victim-blaming.

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Filed Under: street harassment Tagged With: slutwalk, street harassment, victim blaming

“It made me feel slightly better, but still really humiliated.”

April 3, 2012 By Contributor

I was filling up my car at a petrol station, which have been very busy lately (due to the proposed strikes).

I was minding my own business when a young guy in a car full of people shouted out, “Fatty!”

I’ve been harassed about my weight all my life, but this is the first time in the last couple of months. I felt really hurt. I put my middle finger in the air, but didn’t look back so I don’t know if he saw it. It made me feel slightly better, but still really humiliated.

– Anonymous

Location: Petrol Station

Share your street harassment story today and help raise awareness about the problem.
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for what YOU can do about this human rights issue.

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Filed Under: Stories, street harassment

SAAM 2012: “Violence against women is as American as apple pie”

April 2, 2012 By HKearl

Rep. Gwen Moore (D-Wis.) recently gave an eloquent speech advocating for the re-authorization of the Violence Against Women Act (VAWA). In addition to sharing her own stories of sexual abuse she said, “Violence against women is as American as apple pie.”

And she’s right. A December 2011 study by the Center for Disease Control and Prevention found that as many as many as 1 in 3 women have experienced rape, physical violence or stalking by an intimate partner in their lifetimes. And as more and more men come forward with their sexual abuse stories, it’s clear that sexual abuse in general is an epidemic problem.

This is an outrage. Everyone should have the right to lives free from sexual violence. This should not be an American tradition. April is Sexual Assault Awareness Month, and there are a lot of ways you can be involved in speaking out and creating change. Here are 10 ideas for 2012.

1. Believe/help survivors. Believe survivors when they confide in you. Visit the website of the Rape, Abuse & Incest National Network to find information to help you help the survivor. And to find information to help yourself.

2. Find help. If you are a survivor who isn’t sure where to turn to or how to get help, I highly recommend visiting the RAINN website. I volunteered with them for 2.5 years and applaud their work. You can find information about a phone or online hotline and information about recovery.

* Are you male? Visit the website 1 in 6 for resources specifically for you.

* Are you in the military? RAINN has a helpline called Safe Helpline specifically for survivors in the military.

3. No victim-blaming. Don’t engage in victim-blaming. For example, don’t ask about or comment on what a survivor was wearing or  ask if they were drunk or if they were out late at night. On April 3 (tomorrow), Slutwalk Toronto is hosting a day of action for the first-ever International Day Against Victim-Blaming. They say to participate, “start conversations, take a stand, and take up space on April 3rd to fight for our right to live free of violence and victim-blaming. Join us in our mission to spread the word that those who experience sexual violence are never the ones at fault.” Use the twitter hashtag #EndVictimBlaming.

4. Write your Senators. Send a quick e-mail or make a quick phone call to your Senators asking them to re-authorize the Violence Against Women Act.

5. #TweetAboutIt. The National Sexual Violence Resource Center provides a variety of resources each year for Sexual Assault Awareness & Prevention Month, including free reports and manuals and campaign materials. This year, they’re hosting a Tweet About It Tuesday every Tuesday at 2 p.m. EST throughout the month. Various people will lead the tweet-chat on a different topic each week, using the hashtag #TweetAboutIt. Read more and join in.

6. Wear jeans. Make a social statement by wearing jeans on April 25 as part of Denim Day in LA & USA. The day is a visible way to protest against misconceptions that surround sexual assault. Order their Denim Day Action Kit and raise awareness at your workplace, neighborhood, or community. Encourage each person who participates to donate one dollar to Denim Day to fund prevention programming. (I just ordered my kit.)

7. Work to prevent sexual abuse of Native Americans. Native American women face the highest rates of rape of any demographic: 1 in 3 will be raped in their lifetime.

* Learn more and read about the maze of injustice that keeps survivors from finding justice.

* Donate to Project Respect, an organization that works to combat sexual and gender based violence amongst South Dakota’s Native American youth. The funds will go toward creating a youth shelter/programming area and a summer mentoring program that pairs Native American teens with adolescents entering middle school.

8. Advocate against military sexual assault. Sexual assault in the military is a well documented problem, yet the military does very little to truly address or prevent it.

* Sign a petition addressed to the U.S. Senate asking them to support H.R. 3435, The STOP Act, and H.R. 1517, The Holley Lynn James Act, legislation that would require the military to do more.

* Watch the trailer for a Sundance Film Festival Award-Winning documentary called The Invisible War about military sexual assault. It will be released on June 15, 2012.

* Donate to AAUW, an organization where I work in my day job, which provides financial support to two sets of plaintiffs who are former service members who were raped or sexually assaulted by their co-workers and are bravely suing the Department of Defense.



9. Use the arts or march
.
Take part or organize arts-based initiatives or a march to raise awareness about sexual assault. Examples of initiatives include:

* The Clothesline Project, an initiative to bear witness to violence against women. Women affected by violence decorate a shirt and hang the shirt on a clothesline to be viewed by others as testimony to the problem of men’s violence against women.

* V-Day event offers several performance and film screening options for groups to implement in their community in February, March, and April. The purpose of these events is to raise awareness about violence against women and girls as well as raise money for local beneficiaries that are working to end violence. There is no theater or producing experience necessary. Visit the V-Day website to learn how to organize a V-Day event.

* Story of a Rape Survivor (SOARS) is an award winning multimedia performance you can bring to your community that entertains as well as educates the audience about sexual assault prevention. Featuring the music of Nina Simone, Maxwell, and Sade, SOARS tells one woman’s story about how she reclaimed her body, sexuality, and self-esteem after being sexually assaulted in college. SOARS is a cutting-edge theatrical experience that stars a diverse cast of women, combining photographs, dance, spoken-word poetry and music as a way to educate about healing from sexual violence.

* By wearing a white ribbon, White Ribbon Campaign members make a personal pledge to “never commit, condone or remain silent about violence against women and girls.” You can order materials to help challenge the community to speak out on the issue, learn about sexual violence, and raise public awareness.

* Organize or participate in a Take Back the Night March in your community or on campus and make a statement that women have the right to be in public and to go about their lives without the risk of sexual violence. Order a kit with resources for the event.

10. Support consent. One fun way to work to prevent sexual assault is to talk about and emphasize consent in all sexual activities. Here are two amazing initiatives you can bring to your campus or community to do that:

* The Consensual Project is an interactive, sex-positive, fun workshop during which participants can learn why consensual hooking up is hotter hooking up. College students are an ideal audience for this workshop.

* The Line is a film that explores the intersection of sexual identity, power, and violence. How do we negotiate our boundaries as sexually liberated women? How much are we desensitized to sexual violence? Through conversations with football players, educators, survivors of violence, prostitutes, and attorneys, this personal film explores the “grey area” and the elusive line of consent.

(And if you’re unsure about the connection between street harassment and sexual assault, listen to a CALCASA Prevention podcast where I talk about the connections. Briefly, some of the connections are that both behaviors fall on the same spectrum of gender violence; street harassment sometimes escalates into sexual violence; and street harassment can be re-triggering for survivors of sexual abuse.)

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Filed Under: Resources, street harassment Tagged With: a long walk home, april, CDC, clothesline project, denim day, gwen moore, native american youth, project respect, rape, sexual abuse of boys, sexual assault, Sexual Assault Awareness Month, slutwalk toronto, take back the night, the invisible war, V-Day

“This harassment led to my mum withdrawing an offer on a house we were going to buy”

April 2, 2012 By Contributor

** Trigger warning **

I am 18 years old and attending sixth form. One day, as I left my college at about 4.45 p.m. I saw a young male (around 14) walking towards me. He said something but I couldn’t hear what, as I had earphones in. As we became level, he shoved my chest, slightly groping my breast as he did so, then kept walking. I turned round and gave him the middle finger, then continued on my way to the train station.

A couple of minutes later I could just about hear something behind me. I looked round, to see that he was following me and saying things. I kept listening to my music and walking, trying to ignore him, thinking he’s just a kid, I’m only 10 minutes away from the station, it’s still kind of light. I thought I was relatively safe.

When I stopped to cross a road, he caught up to me. I took out my earphones and asked him “Do you have a problem?” then walked off angrily. To my surprise he replied, “Yeah I do actually.”

I kept walking, only to be followed by him, repeating behind me, “Do you have a problem?” mimicking me.

My face burning, I walked on, him still behind me, talking. I ignored it as best I could.
At another crossing, he caught up to me again. I sarcastically asked him, “Are you going to follow me all the way home?” knowing my mum would be at the train station to pick me up, along with my sister whose train was arriving in 5 minutes.

His reply made me shudder, especially coming from someone so young, “Yeah, I’m gonna rape you.”

I didn’t know how to respond, but now being just two minutes’ walk away from the train station I decided to walk on.

He followed me still. As I approached the train station I felt him hit the back of my head – not hard, more to get my attention, so I decided not to indulge him and just kept walking.

Unfortunately this was a mistake.

I entered the carpark of the train station and he shoved me hard, causing me to fall onto a parked car to my left. I got up and he kicked me in the leg so I tried to hit him back but he mostly deflected it. Though he was slightly shorter than me (I’m very short at 5’1″ but was wearing shoes with a slight heel), he was bigger. I managed to walk on a few more steps, knowing that just around the corner, at the far end of the carpark, was my mum. However he pushed me again, this time against the back of a van. He held me there and tried to kiss me, but I managed to get free. He held onto my arm as I walked away but (to my surprise) I was slightly stronger and pulled him along a little, before pulling free and walking very quickly down to my mum’s car.

I collapsed into the car and told my mum what had happened. The boy actually walked past my car and looked in at me for about a minute, before walking onto the train platform and out of sight.

At first I was too shaken up to do anything but I called my boyfriend and he convinced me to call the police.

I told the local police what had happened and they sent an officer over to my house. She took a statement from me, and also took the clothes I was wearing as he had touched me so there may be trace DNA.

An investigation was launched and it turned out that someone matching the description I gave had been harassing multiple other girls from my college, and some of them had come forward and given statements too.

This was just over a month ago, and last week I was asked to do an ID parade. Unfortunately, it was so long ago and he had been wearing a hat, and I was unable to identify him in the ID parade. The good news is that some of the other girls apparently were.

Hopefully they will catch him, as he has been repeatedly making girls in my area feel uncomfortable and unsafe.

This harassment led to my mum withdrawing an offer on a house we were going to buy – thankfully – as it was on the road that this boy is suspected to live on. The idea of living there terrified me, and luckily we have now bought a house on the nicer side of the town.

The incident unsettled me as it occurred on a route I take almost every day at the same time, and I hope I don’t encounter him again – it worries me every time I walk that way.

The most worrying thing is that this was someone around the age of 14, perhaps even younger. Still a child. If they don’t catch him now, I worry what will happen when he is older – bigger and stronger, and actually able to carry out his threats of rape.

– Milly

Location: Wellington, Telford, England

Share your street harassment story today and help raise awareness about the problem.
Find suggestions
for what YOU can do about this human rights issue.

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Filed Under: Stories, street harassment

“Who slaps someone…for a phone number?”

March 30, 2012 By HKearl

The DC Women’s Theater group put together an amazing showcase of monologues for the very last event of International Anti-Street Harassment Week. Here are six of the monologues. They’re each about two minutes and they’re all very powerful.

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Filed Under: anti-street harassment week, street harassment Tagged With: dc women's theater, monologues, street harassment

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