• About Us
    • What Is Street Harassment?
    • Why Stopping Street Harassment Matters
    • Meet the Team
      • Board of Directors
      • Past Board Members
    • In The Media
  • Our Work
    • National Street Harassment Hotline
    • International Anti-Street Harassment Week
    • Blog Correspondents
      • Past SSH Correspondents
    • Safe Public Spaces Mentoring Program
    • Publications
    • National Studies
    • Campaigns against Companies
    • Washington, D.C. Activism
  • Our Books
  • Donate
  • Store

Stop Street Harassment

Making Public Spaces Safe and Welcoming

  • Facebook
  • Instagram
  • Pinterest
  • Tumblr
  • Twitter
  • YouTube
  • Home
  • Blog
    • Harassment Stories
    • Blog Correspondents
    • Street Respect Stories
  • Help & Advice
    • National Street Harassment Hotline
    • Dealing With Harassers
      • Assertive Responses
      • Reporting Harassers
      • Bystander Responses
      • Creative Responses
    • What to Do Before or After Harassment
    • Street Harassment and the Law
  • Resources
    • Definitions
    • Statistics
    • Articles & Books
    • Anti-Harassment Groups & Campaigns
    • Male Allies
      • Educating Boys & Men
      • How to Talk to Women
      • Bystander Tips
    • Video Clips
    • Images & Flyers
  • Take Community Action
  • Contact

USA: New Year, New Challenges

January 7, 2013 By Contributor

By: Carla C. Avenia, Stop Street Harassment Correspondent and Social Media Volunteer

The year 2012 has been full of achievements for Stop Street Harassment and the anti-street harassment community.

But the new year is just a few days young, and women and activists have already had to do a lot of work.

Our first challenge arose as soon as the clock struck midnight on the 31st, when Republican politicians allowed for the Violence Against Women Act to expire, which means that domestic abuse survivors across the country will receive much less help until a new plan is in place.

The mass protests in India after a young woman was harassed and then brutally gang-raped and then died from her injuries are still ongoing. Although a most horrific case, she has not been the only victim of attackers trying to intimidate the anti-street harassment protesters. Another young protester was also gang-raped, and after police tried to convince her to drop the charges and marry one of her attackers, she committed suicide.

Back on our own soil, young men from Steubenville High were caught on camera mocking a rape victim. Parents and other responsible adults surrounding the culprits have engaged in a high-scale cover up operation rather than admit at their failings as parental and authority figures and prosecute these young men.

Just before the new year, the Department of Veterans Affairs published a study in which it is revealed that as many as 48.6% of women who served in war zones claim to have been sexually harassed, while 22.8% of them said they were sexually assaulted or raped.

As you can see from just the last seven days of news, sexual violence against women – whether on the streets, in the workplace, at school, even at home – is still endemic, everywhere. Women of all ages, social backgrounds, races, and religious beliefs are victimized every day.

We have a lot of work ahead of us this year. So what can you do?

Get involved. There are many ways to contribute to the cause!

* Submit your street harassment story and share your experience.

* Report harassers

* Learn how to take action.

* Raise awareness and participate in International Street Harassment Awareness Week, April 7-13, 2013. Go one step further and get your community or your local activist group involved.

Don’t forget to stay in touch with us via Twitter or Facebook!

Carla is a proud feminist originally from Texas, who strongly believes in creating safer spaces for women. She holds a Master’s in Local Development, and she runs her own translation company from France. She is also a travel blogger. You can find her on Twitter.

Her photo was taken by Norman Acosta.

________________________________________________________________________

El año 2012 estuvo repleto de éxitos por parte de nuestra organización, Stop Street Harassment, tales como los que Holly – nuestra intrépida coordinadora – ha detallado en nuestro blog hace unos pocos días.

Aunque el nuevo año recién ha empezado, ya se han presentado varios retos para el 2013 que tanto mujeres como activistas deberán sobrellevar.

Nuestro principal desafío se originó apenas las campanadas dieron la medianoche el 31 de Diciembre, cuando los políticos Republicanos permitieron que la Ley de la Violencia Contra la Mujer caducara, lo cual significa que las mujeres víctimas de maltrato familiar y violencia doméstica en Estados Unidos recibirán menos asistencia hasta que se instituya una nueva Ley para protegerlas.

En la India, protestas masivas han congelado el país luego que una joven fuera sometida a un ataque bestial en el cual fue torturada y violada en banda. Aunque éste ha sido uno de los ataques mas terroríficos, la joven en cuestión no ha sido la única víctima de agresores decididos a intimidar los y las manifestantes que denuncian el acoso sexual en las calles. Otra joven también ha sido victima de una violación en banda, y al ir a declarar los hechos y presentar cargos ante las autoridades, la policía misma intentó convencerla de retirar los cargos y contraer matrimonio con uno de sus agresores. Poco después, se suicidó.

Volviendo a nuestro propio territorio, jóvenes alumnos de Steubenville High fueron filmados burlándose de una joven, víctima de una violación. Los padres y funcionarios escolares dentro del entorno de los agresores intentado encubrir el hecho en vez de admitir públicamente sus falencias en sus respectivas funciones, y hacer lo correcto enjuiciando a los autores del crimen.

Asimismo, a fines del mes de Diciembre, el Departamento de Asuntos de Veteranos publicó un estudio en el cual se reveló que el 48,6% de las mujeres que han prestado servicios en zonas de guerra sostienen haber sido víctimas de acoso sexual, mientras que el 22,8% de ellas declaran haber sido agredidas sexualmente o violadas.

Como se puede deducir a través de las noticias de los últimos siete días, la violencia sexual contra  la mujer – sea en la calle, el entorno laboral, la escuela o hasta en el hogar – todavía es un problema endémico a nivel mundial. Mujeres de todas las edades, entornos sociales, razas y religiones siguen siendo víctimas de la violencia sexual día a día.

Tenemos mucho trabajo para hacer este año. Y seguro que te preguntas… “Y yo ¿qué puedo hacer?”.

Fácil: involúcrate. ¡Existen varias maneras en las que puedes contribuir a nuestra causa!

* Envíanos un relato de cualquier instancia de acoso sexual en las calle que hayas sufrido. Anímate a compartir tu experiencia.

* Denuncia a un acosador.

* Infórmate sobre como actuar frente a una instancia de acoso sexual en la calle.

* Únete a nuestra campaña de sensibilización y haz frente al acoso sexual: participa de nuestra Semana Internacional de Sensibilización Sobre el Acoso Sexual en la Calle, del 7 al 13 de Abril, 2013. Y ya que estás, ¿por qué no ir un poco más allá e involucrar a tu comunidad o a un grupo activista local?

Y claro está, puedes mantenerte al tanto de todas nuestras novedades a través de Twitter y Facebook.

Carla es una feminista Tejana, dedicada a la causa de crear espacios seguros para las mujeres. Obtuvo su Máster en Desarrollo Local, y es la dueña de su propia compañía de traducción basada en Francia. También relata sus aventuras internacionales en su blog de viajes. Síguela en Twitter.

Share

Filed Under: correspondents

“Yeah, I meant what I said”

January 5, 2013 By Contributor

I was leaving work and heading towards the bus stop, and as I crossed the street this random man, who made commentary at other women who walked by, said, “Hey, pretty mama” at me. Without missing a beat, I said, “I’m not your fucking ‘pretty mama’,” which caused him to say, “Day-um!” in shock. I’ve had a long day and am tired, and am not in the mood to cater to harassers.

As I waited to cross another street the man stopped to stare at me from where he was, still in shock, while I stared back with a “Yeah, I meant what I said” look. He gives up and continues on wherever he was going. Maybe he’ll learn that no one needs to hear his commentary about women who are trying to go about their days.

– Anonymous

Location: I Street NW & 15th Street NW, Washington, DC

Share

Filed Under: Stories, street harassment

Vulgarity Outside Starbucks

January 2, 2013 By Contributor

I was walking on U Street NW just exiting the Starbucks when a large/fat man in his late 30s was riding his bike on the sidewalk approaching my direction. He said the following to me, “If you let me take you home, I’ll let you ride my tongue for 5 hours.”

It was horrifying, disgusting, in daylight and made me feel creeped out. I screamed at him, “You’re not supposed to ride your bike on the sidewalk, you dork! And go fuck yourself asshole.”

He yelled something to me inaudible when he got to the corner and kept riding his bike onward.

– Anonymous

Location: U Street NW between Starbucks and Vida, Washington, DC

Share

Filed Under: Stories, street harassment

“I was so scared and embarrassed I cried the rest of my way home

December 30, 2012 By Contributor

I was heading home from work, and was walking down the footpath, when a group of young adults pulled there car to the side , and the guy in the passenger seat pulls down his window and yells out, “Hey there, the biggest set of tits I’ve ever seen,” he then starts laughing.

Although I had my headphones in I could still hear him but pretended not to. They then drove of. I was so scared and embarrassed, I cried the rest of my way home, and it wasn’t like I was wearing a low cut top, I was in my work uniform (buttoned up shirt). This kind of behaviour is disgusting and I feel as though I can’t walk that way anymore.

– SK

Location: Broad daylight

 

Share

Filed Under: Stories, street harassment

Pakistan: “Yet Another Harassment Story”

December 26, 2012 By Contributor

Saniya M. Ali

This is cross posted with permission from Saniya M. Ali’s blog.

I’ve had to face street harassment on a regular basis since the age of 11. The lewd stares, the cat calls, the whistling, a gang of whispering men turning around and smirking at me, a group of  boys coming up to my parked car to drop their number, the not-so-accidental graze a sweaty man would make against me in a crowded market…

I thought I’d seen it all. I thought that this was as bad as it would get for me. Begrudgingly, I had even come to accept it as a collateral damage to my outings. Every time it would annoy me, every time I would ignore it and carry on. So it struck me with surprise that I could come across something that I wasn’t able to brush off.

So here we are, my three girlfriends and I at our favourite burger place for dinner near my university. Our orders arrive and we are busy burying ourselves into food after an entire day of starving. The place is filled with people and I am halfway done with my food when I notice a man sitting in the opposite booth staring at me. He is accompanied by a friend; they must be in their early to mid-thirties. I feel uncomfortable with the way he’s looking at me and I use one of my friends, who is sitting opposite to me with her back to the Staring Man, to shift out of his line of sight. I tell her about the Staring Man and instruct her not to move from her place.

Barely 10 seconds later, he slides to the other end of the booth to continue his leering. I shift again to avoid being ogled at. This is when it starts to annoy me.

A**hole.

I curse him silently, wishing I had the guts to go up to him and tell him to stop. I remembered reading online that asking the harasser to end his behaviour by spelling it out to him may help put a stop to it.

But this is Pakistan. I’m not supposed to talk to a strange man! Will it work? Or will he interpret it in the opposite way? What if it gets worse than just staring?

I don’t have long with my thoughts. Staring Man stands up and gives me a long stare with that eerie smirk of his. I immediately bow my head to cover my face with my open hair. I feel like I must shield myself. I must prove an obstacle to his game. He walks away to get drinks and comes back. I keep my head down.

My friend asks if I want to switch places so that my back is towards him. I say no. The truth is, I don’t want to get any closer to Staring Man. My friends move closer together, though, so his view is completely blocked. They are now uncomfortable as well. The mood is heavy and we’re silent.

I scan the restaurant. There are plenty of non-staring males. There’s one who seems my age having dinner with a couple of his female friends.

Should I ask him for help? But what will I tell him? He’ll just scoff at me for overreacting. Forget it.

Staring Man whispers something to his friend who then gets up, turns around, and takes his time staring at me before he goes to get his drinks.

What the hell is their problem?

When he returns, he slinks to the other end of the booth, turns around again and then stares at me. I catch him staring but he doesn’t look away. He simply keeps on looking with an indescribably unnerving stare, with a sneer on his face.

Rage boils inside of me. I’ve had enough. Why can’t I have a nice night out with my friends and eat in peace? Am I some kind of an animal in a zoo? I want to go up to them and yell at them. I want to plant a slap on their faces. I want to tell them to give me some respect. But I do none of those.

I jump out of my seat and run out of the restaurant. I can’t stand to be in their sight for a second longer. I run away from those two men, hating them for ruining my nice dinner, hating myself for not doing something about it. I blink away tears of anger, before anyone notices.

One of my friends follows me and we seek refuge in a shop next door. The shop has a glass front so I climb the first floor and hide in the back corner so that they don’t see us, if they happen to follow us. I’m scared and in a really bad mood.

They don’t come.

Thank God.

Fifteen minutes later, my other two friends join me and informed that Staring Man and Sidekick left as soon as I did. That’s when I remember that they had no food on their table. Why were they still sitting then? Nevertheless, I breathe a sigh of relief knowing that they didn’t follow me into the shop. Maybe they left. Slowly, I return to my good mood and we spend a good 40 minutes in the shop. We laugh, we shop, we take a few pictures and then we leave to find a rickshaw back to university.

We exit the shop and have only walked a few paces that a car drives by near us and stops. Out comes the Staring Man, his friend sitting behind the wheel.

Oh my God, I thought they left!

We panic and run to the nearest security guard we can find.

“Uncle, aap humein please rickshaw la dein gay? (Uncle, can you please get a hold of a rickshaw for us?),” I ask.
“Aap main road pay jaein gi tou aap ko mil jaey ga. (You’ll find one if you go on the main road.)”
“Asal mein humaray peechay koi aa raha hai. (Actually, there’s someone following us).”

He is much more cooperative now and asks us to wait right there. He leaves us with a couple of other security guards. I am allowed to feel safe barely for a moment before paranoia hits us all.

“What do they want from us?”
“Were they waiting outside all this time?”
“Should we tell the police?”
“What’s the police going to do?”
“Are they going to follow us?”
“What if they stop our rickshaw as we’re on our way back?”
“STOP IT!”
We fall silent, each of us now privately thinking of worst case scenarios.

I wish I’d brought something that could be used as a weapon. Why didn’t I bring my scissors? (I have taken them a couple of times as safety measures.)

Staring Man is standing a few feet away from us, lurking in the shadows. He’s still looking at us with that frightening stare of his. I just want to go back and reach safely.

Finally, we get our rickshaw and we tell the driver to take us from the main road – no shortcuts. We want to be surrounded by people and stay in the light so someone can help us if things get to their worst. Maybe it will deter them in the first place from doing anything of the sort. I don’t want to think what sort. I just need to get back.

The car comes in front of our rickshaw and tries to stop it while we’re on a narrow road.

Please, don’t let this happen!

Fortunately, we slip through a gap. But we’re not fortunate enough for long.

Staring Man brings up his car adjacent to our rickshaw and rolls down his window to talk to the driver. Our rickshaw slows down.

“Yeh larkiyan aisay he ghabra rahi hain. Inko yeh kaghaz day dein. (These girls are getting scared for no reason. Give them this paper.)”

Our terror bursts forth.
“Rickshaw mat rokein! (Don’t stop the rickshaw!)”
“Uncle, aap chaltay rahein! (Uncle, keep moving!)”
“Day dein yeh kaghaz unhein, day dein! (Give them this paper, give it!),” Staring Man screams.

“Kaghaz mat lein! (Don’t take the paper!)”

But he has already taken it. One of my friends grabs the paper and throws it back at Staring Man, outside the rickshaw. They speed off, cackling, pleased with themselves.

We arrive back at our university. Our nice night ruined. We went out for dinner, and came back terrorised. I narrated the entire story to one of my male friends and the conversation ended a little like this:

“Tum aisay baal khol k gai hui thi? (You went with your hair open like this?)”

I had gotten a haircut earlier the day the harassment happened.
“Umm…haan. (Yes.)” I said, puzzled.

“Tou phir tou peechay parna he tha us nay. (Then it’s obvious he would have followed you).”

I am flabbergasted. It was my open hair that provoked him? It’s my fault that he stalked and terrorised my friends and I? Is the man himself to no blame? The fact that he harassed me while I was doing nothing but simply having dinner with my friends is my fault. I am to blame for his misdoings. He is not wrong for being the harasser, but I am guilty of the crime of simply being there.

This was a wake up call to me regarding the extent to which people have internalised the notion of victim blaming. I have read about it, I have argued against it, but never have I had to face it like this before. My own friend was blaming me! I suddenly thought of other women who have faced sexual harassment, who have been raped, and how they must be blamed by society for bringing it onto themselves. I cannot begin to imagine what they must feel.

I wish I could end this on a more optimistic note, but I cannot. I keep imagining scenarios where I face my harasser and heroically save myself and other women from his harassment. I wonder how that must feel, but I’m suppressed by my own fears. Nonetheless, I know what I must do.

I must not stay silent.

The rest I’ll figure out on the road.
Share

Filed Under: Stories, street harassment

« Previous Page
Next Page »

Share Your Story

Share your street harassment story for the blog. Donate Now

From the Blog

  • #MeToo 2024 Study Released Today
  • Join International Anti-Street Harassment Week 2022
  • Giving Tuesday – Fund the Hotline
  • Thank You – International Anti-Street Harassment Week 2021
  • Share Your Story – Safecity and Catcalls Collaboration

Buy the Book

  • Contact
  • Events
  • Join Us
  • Donate
  • Facebook
  • Instagram
  • Pinterest
  • Tumblr
  • Twitter
  • YouTube

Copyright © 2026 Stop Street Harassment · Website Design by Sarah Marie Lacy